Forced to receive treatment

[imdonewithallofthis]

I've been dealing with anorexia for a little while now and it had gotten really bad earlier this year in January . I was hospitalized for a month and was forced to eat extreme amounts of food every single day. I was trapped in that hospital for over a month. It was horrible. I left and have just been fluctuating in weight sense. Now my parents are forcing me to go to a treatment program called partial hospitalization that's 12 hours away. It's better than the hospital but I don't want to go. I have no choice. I had refused to go but they said if I don't i have to do residential. Which I would rather drink bleach and slit my wrists then go to one of those places. You basically live in a house with other mentally ill people and eat together for months.

I was gonna try full suspension hanging but never got to order the rope. Now I'm leaving tomorrow and have nothing to try to Ctb. I don't know what to do. I only have a charging cord that's thick and long but I heard those aren't good. I doubt we have any medication that would actually kill me. And if I try , and don't succeed everything will just be so much worse. what else could I use?

 

[FuneralCry]

I'm sorry you've had to suffer in this cruel existence, I hope you find peace.