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Thatdude

Life is temporary, death is permanent
Sep 26, 2019
469
When I was 4. I tried to bash my head into the ground.

Later when I was in my teens I tried shooting a flare off in my mouth, but it seem like it was broken. I tried weed killer, but other than hurting my throat it didn't do anything. I tried blowing up myself with gas cans. But it turns out lighting the mouth doesn't have the flames go inside. I can go on, but I remember the bulk of my failures.
 
Tonight634

Tonight634

Member
Aug 24, 2020
90
I remember the first time. March 1996, downed about 70 prescription pain killers with a bottle of vodka, it wasn't over a bad soundtrack lol, but just a very difficult 25 years of life (at that point). I died twice, but sadly was brought back to life, and spent a week in hospital reversing all the effects the medication was doing to my organs.
What was it like to be dead?
 
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M

MariV

Arcanist
Sep 13, 2020
487
i really admire the courage of you people here who cut your wrists. if ctb takes balls, doing it that way even more. i wish things were different and your determination could be used some other way. but well life is how it is
 
RC90

RC90

Experienced
Sep 13, 2020
297
Cuando tenia 12, comence a tener pensamientos suicidas, a los 13 conoci a un chico que vivia en mexico, asi que tuve una relación amorosa a distancia, hasta que me termino alos 15, dejamos de hablar, luego de eso empece a tener relaciones con un chico que "me gustaba", quede en embarazo y lamentablemente tuve un aborto, cuando cumpli 16 realice mi primer intento de suicidio, me corte las manos y piernas y me tome 10 tabletas de paracetamol, y de Ibuprofeno entre otras, funciono, me llevaron a la clinica, y me hicieron lavado de estómago.
Ahora tengo 18 años, me di cuenta que el chico al que me gustaba se suicido el 27 de enero del 2020, se tiro a los rieles del tren, y lo corto a la mitad, por eso me corte las venas y me desangre en el mes de enero, me han internado 3 veces en una clinica mental, tomo pastillas para la depresion y bipolaridad, solo espero que para este fin de año, pueda tomar el autobús.
Que triste tu história
i really admire the courage of you people here who cut your wrists. if ctb takes balls, doing it that way even more. i wish things were different and your determination could be used some other way. but well life is how it is
I took 20 stitches on my attempt. Now have some scars that I have to hide all the time.
 
D

DeadBirdSaysGoodbye

Member
Sep 21, 2020
20
My first time I was 12. I took a bottle of vitamins- I was a kid I thought it would kill me to get me out of all the abuse. I took them before school ended up being really sick at school. Admitted what I did- and who showed up to get me at school? my father the one I was trying to get away from.

The first time I used a method that could have taken me out- I was 17. I had a daughter at 16 with an abusive man. He was more evil than my father. My brother came to my apartment grabbed my daughter and ran with her. I didn't know anything about laws back than. Like that was kidnapping and I could call the police to get her back. My mom thought I was trash- and she married a younger man. He wanted kids and she couldn't have anymore. So she sent my brother to my apartment to take my daughter. My dad for the first 15 yrs and 2 months of my life beat me and told me how worthless I was and he wished I was an abortion. He died when I was 15 yrs and 2 months old. About 6 months later I met my daughters father who used me as a punching bag and called me horrible names, he was worse than my father. I think we were together about a yr and a half we split up because he put a gun to my head for the 2nd time. I was done being abused. Anyway, After being abused by my dad, my daughters father, being bullied in elementary school, now my mom thinks I'm worthless, my daughter is gone- I cut my wrists. My roommate came home to find me bleeding and called the cops. I end up in a psychiatric hospital. They were going to let me out - even though I had moved out at 16 I was still a minor at 17. I'll never forget sitting with the psychiatrist and in walks my mother. Who says I don't think she is ready to come out yet. Due to being a minor my mother had all the rights to say keep me longer. I stood up punched a hole in his closet door in the room and screamed she took my daughter! she can't give my step dad kids and took mine she wants me here longer so I can't get my daughter back. My mom was notorious for getting puppies and kittens when the cuteness wore off she would get them new homes. While I was in the hospital she got bored of my daughter and gave her to her father- yeah that guy who choked me, punched me, mentally tortured me and put a gun to my head twice... anyway she destroyed me daughters life and mine... hmm 2 or 3 more attempts after that.. but that was my first one that could have taken me out.

Incredibly awful. I'm so so sorry.
 
D

DeadBirdSaysGoodbye

Member
Sep 21, 2020
20
I was about 9 or 10 and tried to jump out of a first story window at after school club. Looking back it was odd that nothing happened after that incident. I just got pulled from the ledge, went home and had dinner.

9 or 10 - just so young. Heartbreaking.
 

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