goodSmelly
Member
- Dec 24, 2023
- 15
I don't know what I was expecting to feel. the only thing I can describe it as is a grime acceptance. I would have already done it if not for my goal of completing my memoir/elaborate note.
I've had suicidal ideation for the majority of my life. I'm 25 and my earliest memory is when I was from 8-10.
the ideation comes in peaks and valleys, however, especially in the last three years the peaks have eroded away and the valleys have grown substantially. i have two moods; horribly suicidal and empty. no joy, no anger, no excitement.
on of the things a former friend said to me is that "I need to be kind to myself". ctb is the nicest thing I can do.
I've had suicidal ideation for the majority of my life. I'm 25 and my earliest memory is when I was from 8-10.
the ideation comes in peaks and valleys, however, especially in the last three years the peaks have eroded away and the valleys have grown substantially. i have two moods; horribly suicidal and empty. no joy, no anger, no excitement.
on of the things a former friend said to me is that "I need to be kind to myself". ctb is the nicest thing I can do.
