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brokensea

brokensea

Arcanist
Aug 4, 2022
405
I feel so sad today. I feel like I didn't want my life to turn out this way.

I have always felt alone in this world. The world just never made sense. I don't understand why so many of us have to suffer. I don't understand why there are so many horrible people who break you and abuse your trust and shatter you. The parents who are supposed to love you, your friends, your partner. They all hurt you. Life feels utterly pointless. Even your jobs abuse you.

I've just taken step after step in this world leading to just an empty road and a dead end and my life feels completely meaningless. It feels so empty and utterly alone. Even when I thought I wasn't alone it was just something to hurt me with to remind me that I am alone when I ultimately was let down again.

Your only option of escape is meeting some brutal end where you will be leaving people in pain. So you're trapped by guilt and it's like a nightmare you can't escape.

I don't want this life. It's not worth it. I just want to be free of it all.
 
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jodes2

jodes2

Hello people ❤️
Aug 28, 2022
7,736
Sorry you feel so stuck 🤗
 
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makethepainstop

makethepainstop

Visionary
Sep 16, 2022
2,029
I feel so sad today. I feel like I didn't want my life to turn out this way.

I have always felt alone in this world. The world just never made sense. I don't understand why so many of us have to suffer. I don't understand why there are so many horrible people who break you and abuse your trust and shatter you. The parents who are supposed to love you, your friends, your partner. They all hurt you. Life feels utterly pointless. Even your jobs abuse you.

I've just taken step after step in this world leading to just an empty road and a dead end and my life feels completely meaningless. It feels so empty and utterly alone. Even when I thought I wasn't alone it was just something to hurt me with to remind me that I am alone when I ultimately was let down again.

Your only option of escape is meeting some brutal end where you will be leaving people in pain. So you're trapped by guilt and it's like a nightmare you can't escape.

I don't want this life. It's not worth it. I just want to be free of it all.
Feels like that for many of us here, and like you some are torn between living in pain, and achieving pain relief. Much love to you, I cannot think of anything to make such a decision easy. I
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
42,463
Life really is such a terrible concept, as there is so much unnecessary suffering and endless pain that exists and of course it's all very pointless. It can certainly be awful feeling trapped here when all that you want is to be gone. Your feelings of wanting to leave it all behind are understandable. At least in my case, I see nothing to be gained from staying here, instead there are only more ways in which to suffer. I wish you freedom.
 
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Nirrend

Nirrend

The important is not how long you live ...
Mar 12, 2022
400
I feel so sad today. I feel like I didn't want my life to turn out this way.

I have always felt alone in this world. The world just never made sense. I don't understand why so many of us have to suffer. I don't understand why there are so many horrible people who break you and abuse your trust and shatter you. The parents who are supposed to love you, your friends, your partner. They all hurt you. Life feels utterly pointless. Even your jobs abuse you.

I've just taken step after step in this world leading to just an empty road and a dead end and my life feels completely meaningless. It feels so empty and utterly alone. Even when I thought I wasn't alone it was just something to hurt me with to remind me that I am alone when I ultimately was let down again.

Your only option of escape is meeting some brutal end where you will be leaving people in pain. So you're trapped by guilt and it's like a nightmare you can't escape.

I don't want this life. It's not worth it. I just want to be free of it all.

Time can be really hard like you are describing them here... but, sometimes, mood and events can fluctuate to make days less worse, I guess ?

We understand your pain and the way life is leading us can make us feel really scared, tired, sad.

You truely deserve love sweet @brokensea, I'm sorry for what your going through ❤

Sending love ❤❤❤
 
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brokensea

brokensea

Arcanist
Aug 4, 2022
405
Time can be really hard like you are describing them here... but, sometimes, mood and events can fluctuate to make days less worse, I guess ?

We understand your pain and the way life is leading us can make us feel really scared, tired, sad.

You truely deserve love sweet @brokensea, I'm sorry for what your going through ❤

Sending love ❤❤❤
Thank you. I just feel so alone today. Like I've been alone my whole life. Like I'm just looking through a window at a life that can't ever exist for me and I'll never have and I've been just staring at it my whole life. I've been trying to have this thing my whole life and now I just know it won't happen. I haven't felt happiness in over two years and I don't think I ever will again. I can't overcome what life has now ruined for me. All my dreams are gone forever. I feel so hopeless and sad. All I do is watch TV, work, play mindless games. I'm so alone. On rare occasions I hang out with people who I know don't really care about me. Who tire me. Most of the time I can't leave the house. It all feels so pointless. My whole life feels so meaningless. Everything I've done. It feels like it all just meant nothing. I ended up alone no matter what I tried and I'm so old now. I can't imagine just continuing to live this way.
 
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Nirrend

Nirrend

The important is not how long you live ...
Mar 12, 2022
400
Thank you. I just feel so alone today. Like I've been alone my whole life. Like I'm just looking through a window at a life that can't ever exist for me and I'll never have and I've been just staring at it my whole life. I've been trying to have this thing my whole life and now I just know it won't happen. I haven't felt happiness in over two years and I don't think I ever will again. I can't overcome what life has now ruined for me. All my dreams are gone forever. I feel so hopeless and sad. All I do is watch TV, work, play mindless games. I'm so alone. On rare occasions I hang out with people who I know don't really care about me. Who tire me. Most of the time I can't leave the house. It all feels so pointless. My whole life feels so meaningless. Everything I've done. It feels like it all just meant nothing. I ended up alone no matter what I tried and I'm so old now. I can't imagine just continuing to live this way.

I'm so sorry sweet @brokensea, your words are made of sadness and desperation, this is absolutely tragic to read..

I can only understand what you are going through, I'm living the same thing, sometimes, I realise that I'm looking at the sky since more than an hour without having done anything else.

I won't lie to you because I don't know your life and I absolutely don't want to create fake hopes.. Even if this emptiness and loneliness are unbearable today, even if I imagine that sometimes you feel like the ground is crumbling under your feet because your hopes are so low, even if you probably (as I do) tend to play, work or watch TV to entertain your mind and not to think about cruelty of life. Even if all this is unbearable for you, don't forget that you are not alone, there are many of us here going through these things and even if we are not physically together, we are linked in spirit.

Maybe tomorrow will bring you bright skies, maybe the storm is only temporary, I hope so ❤

You are not alone, we understand you and we know you are brave ❤

No matter what you choose to do, and even though all I can wish you is a life filled with happiness

We won't let you down here, by the way, even though I don't log in much and I'm sorry for that, it always makes me feel good to read the posts of the members here, because I recognise myself through them, it makes me feel the same with you 😊

Well, my sweet @brokensea, try to get through this storm by protecting yourself from the wind and lightning, because, tomorrow can be a sunny day, I sincerely wish you that ❤

Love ❤
 
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brokensea

brokensea

Arcanist
Aug 4, 2022
405
I'm so sorry sweet @brokensea, your words are made of sadness and desperation, this is absolutely tragic to read..

I can only understand what you are going through, I'm living the same thing, sometimes, I realise that I'm looking at the sky since more than an hour without having done anything else.

I won't lie to you because I don't know your life and I absolutely don't want to create fake hopes.. Even if this emptiness and loneliness are unbearable today, even if I imagine that sometimes you feel like the ground is crumbling under your feet because your hopes are so low, even if you probably (as I do) tend to play, work or watch TV to entertain your mind and not to think about cruelty of life. Even if all this is unbearable for you, don't forget that you are not alone, there are many of us here going through these things and even if we are not physically together, we are linked in spirit.

Maybe tomorrow will bring you bright skies, maybe the storm is only temporary, I hope so ❤

You are not alone, we understand you and we know you are brave ❤

No matter what you choose to do, and even though all I can wish you is a life filled with happiness

We won't let you down here, by the way, even though I don't log in much and I'm sorry for that, it always makes me feel good to read the posts of the members here, because I recognise myself through them, it makes me feel the same with you 😊

Well, my sweet @brokensea, try to get through this storm by protecting yourself from the wind and lightning, because, tomorrow can be a sunny day, I sincerely wish you that ❤

Love ❤
This was so touching and one of the sweetest things I've ever read. Thank you so much.
 
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LaVieEnRose

LaVieEnRose

Angelic
Jul 23, 2022
4,339
Thank you. I just feel so alone today. Like I've been alone my whole life. Like I'm just looking through a window at a life that can't ever exist for me and I'll never have and I've been just staring at it my whole life. I've been trying to have this thing my whole life and now I just know it won't happen. I haven't felt happiness in over two years and I don't think I ever will again. I can't overcome what life has now ruined for me. All my dreams are gone forever. I feel so hopeless and sad. All I do is watch TV, work, play mindless games. I'm so alone. On rare occasions I hang out with people who I know don't really care about me. Who tire me. Most of the time I can't leave the house. It all feels so pointless. My whole life feels so meaningless. Everything I've done. It feels like it all just meant nothing. I ended up alone no matter what I tried and I'm so old now. I can't imagine just continuing to live this way.
What were your life circumstances when you felt happiness 2 years ago?
 
brokensea

brokensea

Arcanist
Aug 4, 2022
405
What were your life circumstances when you felt happiness 2 years ago?
Well I thought I met the love of my life and we were trying to have a baby together but he left me for another women the last year I had to have a child at my age realistically. So I feel he also took away my last chance to have a child which was my dream. I've been mostly in my home and extremely depressed since then. My life has been sad and awful before all this. My dream was to have a family and have my own happiness someday. Now it's all gone forever. I tried to jump off a building. Had plans to commit suicide soon again but I still talk to my ex and he says he will commit suicide if I do and is holding me hostage in a way. So I feel trapped in hell. All of it was all just another lie. Another fake illusion of happiness and love I had. So I have nothing and no reason to live and I will not overcome this or get over this. This was my dream to have my own child and family. I'm 44 now everything says I have a less than one percent chance now to have a baby. So I'm ready to go after a god awful life my entire existence and now this. I find no purpose in hobbies, my fake friends, I hate my job, really there's nothing left for me in this life. I haven't felt happiness at all since this happened. It's as if my whole life with my child is gone. Like my husband and child died in a accident or something it's the depth of grief I feel. My whole life and all my dreams are gone forever. This dream of knowing what it's like to have a family and being happy someday kept me going through horrible horrible things and now I feel I went through it all for nothing and should have died long ago.
 
LaVieEnRose

LaVieEnRose

Angelic
Jul 23, 2022
4,339
Well I thought I met the love of my life and we were trying to have a baby together but he left me for another women the last year I had to have a child at my age realistically. So I feel he also took away my last chance to have a child which was my dream. I've been mostly in my home and extremely depressed since then. My life has been sad and awful before all this. My dream was to have a family and have my own happiness someday. Now it's all gone forever. I tried to jump off a building. Had plans to commit suicide soon again but I still talk to my ex and he says he will commit suicide if I do and is holding me hostage in a way. So I feel trapped in hell. All of it was all just another lie. Another fake illusion of happiness and love I had. So I have nothing and no reason to live and I will not overcome this or get over this. This was my dream to have my own child and family. I'm 44 now everything says I have a less than one percent chance now to have a baby. So I'm ready to go after a god awful life my entire existence and now this. I find no purpose in hobbies, my fake friends, I hate my job, really there's nothing left for me in this life. I haven't felt happiness at all since this happened. It's as if my whole life with my child is gone. Like my husband and child died in a accident or something it's the depth of grief I feel. My whole life and all my dreams are gone forever. This dream of knowing what it's like to have a family and being happy someday kept me going through horrible horrible things and now I feel I went through it all for nothing and should have died long ago.
I'm sorry to hear all that. Children were never in the cards for me but that wasn't an active decision I made. I know it sucks when life circumstances make the decision for you. It's understandable to feel the grief you do; reproduction is a normal desire. It's not fair on your ex's part to have left you and then to impose the condition that he will go if you do.
 
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