hereandthere13
why me?
- Sep 14, 2023
- 118
i dont really understand my issue. ive been feeling a lot better the last couple of weeks, like waaaay less emotional. i wouldnt go so far to say i'm now this happy-go-lucky gal, blessed to the see the morning light or anything.. but i'm stable. yet, even during times like these, i'm somehow still so depressed??? i'm reminded of my mental disorder pretty much every single day, over and over again. but it doesn't really matter how happy i am.. cus each time it happens, it feels like a deep stab in the gut. or maybe like a stalker watching my every move...? like, i'm constantly paranoid, wondering when the facade will drop and i'll dive head first into another episode. is it tomorrow?? next week???? 30 seconds from now??????? i can't enjoy the good moments when theres so much uncertainty on my mind.
