I'm sorry that you are in a place of despair and hopelessness, and don't want to live your life anymore. However, if this child is yours, you have an obligation to this child to provide for its welfare. You can do this one of two ways. Either by sticking around, working, and providing support to the mother to take care of your child, or you can give the mother an equivalent amount of money, all at once, that you would have had to give her over the course of the next 18 years to support the welfare of the child you helped create. There is no third option. The child is the innocent in all of this. Sorry if you don't like the answer. Man up! Who knows, maybe a beautiful baby you created will give you a reason to live. It should, I would think. You know, someone WHO NEEDS YOU. It's good to be needed.