february in alaska
wandering aimlessly
- Sep 13, 2023
- 465
Got put on a high dose of sertraline just over a year ago and it's been wild. Within a month I felt better than I ever had, and honestly despite the shit I'd seen I figured this was how normal people always felt, and that I had basically been cured
Flash forward to about five months ago and it felt like they stopped working overnight. Literally nothing, back to the deepest depression I'd been in since I was like 13 years old. Overnight. I dunno if my brain gained a tolerance for the drug or what but they don't do shit for me these days. Since coming up with my CTB plan I've forgotten to take them more and more, which I know is just fucking me up further, but I really don't know a difference.
As much as I'm predicting the replies to be a experiences of antidepressants making symptoms worse (this is a site for suicidal people, after all lmao) I'm curious if anyone has had something in particular really work for them, even for just a bit.
I feel like my own mental illness makes it hard to objectively look at the state of the word and decide if it's my time. I wish I had a way to gauge what my decision would be if I fixed all my internal shit. I don't know if that makes sense
Flash forward to about five months ago and it felt like they stopped working overnight. Literally nothing, back to the deepest depression I'd been in since I was like 13 years old. Overnight. I dunno if my brain gained a tolerance for the drug or what but they don't do shit for me these days. Since coming up with my CTB plan I've forgotten to take them more and more, which I know is just fucking me up further, but I really don't know a difference.
As much as I'm predicting the replies to be a experiences of antidepressants making symptoms worse (this is a site for suicidal people, after all lmao) I'm curious if anyone has had something in particular really work for them, even for just a bit.
I feel like my own mental illness makes it hard to objectively look at the state of the word and decide if it's my time. I wish I had a way to gauge what my decision would be if I fixed all my internal shit. I don't know if that makes sense