avalanche.
fast words, deliverance
- May 20, 2024
- 286
sometimes i just want everything to crash down on me so i can give myself more of a push to die. but sometimes i just want myself to be happy. now my life is going great with pretty much everything i wanted but i still feel the same. i still want to die and everyday feels like a chore. everytime i laugh with the people i love, it merely feels like a distraction from how i truly feel. i don't know why i feel this way and i hate myself for it. i feel so guilty for taking advantage of such a good thing and ruining it with my need for death. i want life to work out so so badly but its like my body won't let it. suicide becomes more realistic and practical day through day.
