burninghill
Arcanist
- Dec 2, 2025
- 442
It seems like no matter how hard I try, I just can't seem to get back on my feet.
I'm even worse than I was when I last attempted suicide, I'm mad, irritable and I can't even bare the thought of spending 10 minutes making pasta for dinner tonight.
I haven't been completing work for my university course despite being a very academically focussed person, I relapsed into self-harm again (I used to just cut, now I've found myself trying to deliberately become sick, not necessarily making myself vomit, just wanting to make myself feel unwell) and things in general are becoming hard to cope with. I've lost all of my friends (again) after trying to regain them post-attempt.
My friends have seen my cuts, I told them I had to disappear for a few weeks because I was recovering from two suicide attempts and nobody will forgive me. I have nobody besides my parents, who don't even know what's going on with me.
The worst part of it is that, despite feeling worse, the urge to kill myself is no longer there and I can't force it. I feel trapped and disconnected from everything around me. Nothing feels real. I want to start again
I'm even worse than I was when I last attempted suicide, I'm mad, irritable and I can't even bare the thought of spending 10 minutes making pasta for dinner tonight.
I haven't been completing work for my university course despite being a very academically focussed person, I relapsed into self-harm again (I used to just cut, now I've found myself trying to deliberately become sick, not necessarily making myself vomit, just wanting to make myself feel unwell) and things in general are becoming hard to cope with. I've lost all of my friends (again) after trying to regain them post-attempt.
My friends have seen my cuts, I told them I had to disappear for a few weeks because I was recovering from two suicide attempts and nobody will forgive me. I have nobody besides my parents, who don't even know what's going on with me.
The worst part of it is that, despite feeling worse, the urge to kill myself is no longer there and I can't force it. I feel trapped and disconnected from everything around me. Nothing feels real. I want to start again
