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pineappleonpizza

pineappleonpizza

New Member
Nov 17, 2024
1
Hey, it's been awhile since I posted here - but I genuinely have never been more ready to CTB than I am right now. I decided to give life another go. Went to hospital x3 where I was severely traumatised and abused. Only to end up homeless and selling my body just to get by. To then being brutally assaulted by 2 guys in the span of 20minutes (one I'd been friends with for over 5 years) I had a girl declare I was her girlfriend and was abusive in every way while all of this was going on.

My family who I LIVE with didn't even contact me for the months I was in hospital and then in an unknown location for over a month… correction my mum did visit me twice in 3 months and that was to bring me clothes. I never heard from my dad or brother.

I'm home now, my family don't talk to me (genuinely) when I first got home I thought things were good between mum and I but now she's just awful towards me and genuinely hates me for some reason.

I am tired. I am exhausted.

I already have one method in mind - I've done it a few times before but almost perfected the dosage last time - ambos said 5 minutes later and they wouldn't have been able to save me. I was put on life support and obviously survived. So I know how much to increase the dosage by to make it work, but I'm scared if someone finds me and I'm given charcoal like last time, then it's all over and I have to live this bs thing we call life just for me to feel worse and hurt more and everyone be angry at me all over again.

When I was last on here I made a very detailed notes page and was able to obtain everything but the SN. I'm in Australia.

I want the SN because I don't want there to be any chance I'm brought back - I have everything else I need barre the SN - I'm not asking for a link but if someone could point me in the direction of getting SN in Australia that would be appreciated.

I need a back up plan in case one doesn't work - they can't stop both

I'm thinking of locations and I want something really relaxing and peaceful. I also don't want to cause trauma to anyone who finds me. I have a few locations in mind but right now my biggest issue is finding the SN and getting it into Australia.

I don't want to go alone, I wish I could have someone sit with me while they play with my hair but that's obviously never going to happen. So I'll be alone when I do it. I'll choose somewhere pretty
 
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