Discussion Everyone says our loved ones suffer with intense grief, but eventually everyone gets over it. So in the end, CTB. Shouldn't be controversial

[botanist_dude]

What do you think?
I sometimes visit the r/suicide bereavement sub and lots of posts talk about getting over the grief. So that got me thinking... Choosing to CTB isn't really that bad or shouldn't be considered so terrible: it's a personal choice to end our own lives and our loved ones seem to be eventually ok.
So I think that choosing to CTB shouldn't be so taboo.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

I mean I'm evil enough to not care much at all about how my friends and family are going to feel after my suicide. It is this very same evilness and selfishness that mandates my suicide in the first place because if I'm left to stay alive I will inevitably hurt so many innocent people in much worse ways than just by leaving them bereaved. I've even remained unfazed by other people's threats to kill themselves in the event I kill myself. Go ahead. Throw your life away for someone evil enough to not give a damn about the consequences of throwing his life away.

 

[ijustwishtodie]

I agree. And besides, most people have to go through grief to begin with irrespective of whether their loved one dies by suicide or dies by a natural cause. That's the price to pay for procreating to begin with. If you didn't want to feel grief over your offspring killing themselves... maybe you shouldn't have had a child to begin with

 

[botanist_dude]

I mean I'm evil enough to not care much at all about how my friends and family are going to feel after my suicide. It is this very same evilness and selfishness that mandates my suicide in the first place because if I'm left to stay alive I will inevitably hurt so many innocent people in much worse ways than just by leaving them bereaved. I've even remained unfazed by other people's threats to kill themselves in the event I kill myself. Go ahead. Throw your life away for someone evil enough to not give a damn about the consequences of throwing his life away.

I kinda envy you my friend. I wish I was this cold. Kudos

I agree. And besides, most people have to go through grief to begin with irrespective of whether their loved one dies by suicide or dies by a natural cause. That's the price to pay for procreating to begin with. If you didn't want to feel grief over your offspring killing themselves... maybe you shouldn't have had a child to begin with

Very true

 

[Ash]

I don't know anyone who has ever managed to "get over" the death of a loved one. Learned to live with, yes. Accepted, yes. As we have no choice. Death is a certainty. But it's not easy for those are left behind and it's no good pretending otherwise, no matter how terrible we ourselves feel.

 

[UKscotty]

Getting over it is not the same as being OK or becoming uncaring to it.

Suicide is always tragic to people left behind, accepting this is part of our own journey to CTB.

It's OK to care about how those left will feel. Not caring about other people is a psychopath or sociopath trait.

 

[acephale]

I think suicide is better choice, and they can understand it.

 

[Forever Sleep]

They may not get over it but we may just as easily never solve the problems that blight our lives. So- it can be just as much about putting it to them- are you really ok with us living like this? If so- that's pretty cruel too.

The ideal of course would be if it were easier to talk about in the open. Without fear of being incarcerated or some extreme reaction. If we could prepare people and at least try to get them to see it from our point of view- surely that would help.

It's really hard to judge how things will affect people though. You'd hope they would at least acknowledge that a person would need to be in extreme distress to end their suffering. You'd at least hope they could feel relieved that we did put an end to that. I do believe that if you truly do love someone, you don't want to witness them suffering.

 

[FuneralCry]

If one wants to voluntarily end their own existence then that's their personal decision, it's not about other people anyway. Honestly I don't get why people bring life here in the first place when they are so anti-death as we are all just going to die anyway. it's disgusting how they impose existence even know existing is nothing more than meaningless suffering and call people "selfish" if they want to free themselves from this hellish and meaningless imposistion they never could have consented to. These people are the selfish ones instead, suicide is a human right anyway no matter what they say, what about all the intense suffering procreation causes.

 

[errorsinmypast]

I agree, it's more a case of learning to live with the loss then being ok with it happening. I've lost my sister to ctb, and somedays it brings me to my knees, hell typing this is making me cry but I have to get on with it or lose my kids, house, job

 

[etherealspring]

I mean I'm evil enough to not care much at all about how my friends and family are going to feel after my suicide. It is this very same evilness and selfishness that mandates my suicide in the first place because if I'm left to stay alive I will inevitably hurt so many innocent people in much worse ways than just by leaving them bereaved. I've even remained unfazed by other people's threats to kill themselves in the event I kill myself. Go ahead. Throw your life away for someone evil enough to not give a damn about the consequences of throwing his life away.

i relate to this too. tho its more like im too tired to care anymore

 

[Praestat_Mori]

Loved ones, friends, relatives, closest family will eventually get over if with time when they don't suffer form other problems that are unsolvable for them. Life will go on for them as it goes on after a natural death.

It's the ever unsolvable problem. Either we are suffering for many decades with our unsolvable problems or someone else suffers and griefs for some time and eventually goes on living their lives.

 

[Ironborn]

Imagine making someone suffer for decades because you don't want to feel grief or sadness.

I see it as someone escaping their prison, if someone I knew finally caught the bus I would grieve that they were gone from my life but moreso be happy and glad they finally achieved their freedom.

Nobody really cares about suicide until it affects them and suddenly it's the most important thing in the world.

 

[Orange Cat]

People don't get over it when someone close to them commits suicide.Not if they really care about them. It's not the same thing as a natural death. They blame themselves thinking that if they did something different they would have been able to prevent it (whether that's really true or not).

 

[Roadrunner]

I feel terrible remorse for my loved ones after I succeed. Probably one of many reasons I'm still alive and suffering mentally. I'm glad they don't live with the anxiety and depression I do. Because they don't, I know they'll never understand. I've always felt that anyone that has been lucky enough to not suffer with the pain in the mind is unable to fully understand how it feels. I hope they get over it. If anyone lives long enough they eventually have to mourn the lose of a loved one. Hopefully they get over it as well as most. I just cant live with this torture in my mind much longer. The meds numb it, but with no increase in happiness. Anyway, sorry for the ramble. That's just how I feel about the subject.

 

[willitpass]

People don't get over death. Many are able to learn to move on while still carrying that burden, but they don't get over it. And sometimes grief is deadly. Some people are never able to move on, especially when it was a sudden, unexpected, tragic death like suicide of a young person. Many people who tell themselves that their loved ones won't care are telling themselves that as a coping mechanism. They will care. They will grieve. If they're lucky and well equipped with coping skills, they'll even eventually carry on, but they will never stop thinking about you and wondering what they could have done or what life would be like with you there. Very few people truly have not a single person in their life who would be effected by their death, even if it's a waitress at a coffee shop you frequent or a therapist you've been seeing for a few years. Nearly everybody has someone who will grieve you. And if that someone is a loved one, that grief will be heavy. The question comes down to if you have it in you to carry on for them or if it has become too much for you to bare to stay alive for others any longer.