Venting ever get that feeling that you have everything now, but the feeling of suicide never left ?

[Buh-bye!]

so i do not really think everything' alright but things are getting normal, i am having better days.. and i think if i were to be in this place before, i wouldn't have given suicide a thought. but i just think i've lost so much that i don't wanna start over and everything just seems too pointless to me, i think i for once have a clear decision to make so i am gonna make it.

i wanna ask if there is a term for this condition when people aren't in a very bad situation yet they do not really want anything to do with life and just ctb ?

 

[UKscotty]

Only we can make the decision.

Until we CTB there is always hope of a recovery I guess.

I do believe a small minority if us are unfortunately too broken to recover in current medical understanding though.

 

[4g1vvvven]

It's probably a comforting idea that many become attached to, I can definitely appreciate why even if your circumstances improved you'd cling to the idea that you could end things.

You probably would cling to it longer if you don't feel secure in whatever improvements you've experienced

 

[Buh-bye!]

Until we CTB there is always hope of a recovery I guess.

words of truth. you don't know what may affect your mind, positively or negatively. i am maybe scared of that idea a little, that's why i stay confined to myself most of the time, i don't want any more positives to happen, i don't want, a change.

 

[CoffeeN]

The word is ACCEPTANCE. You feel like what if I start over again and then everything crashes down or when you start changing for better life , life does not let you achieve that easily.you can't accept the truth that you still can change things.Imagine you get super successful,but still suicidal, what's the point in changing your current situation. You need a reason else you can't accept change. Again I say it , have a backup cbt plan , change urself,but even after that IF shit goes down... U say to God I tried,but there r real a**holes outside, and I didn't gave up and fought till the end.amen.
What could be ur reason? I don't know...,

 

[notforl0ng]

I got the job I always wanted at the plant that created the town I was born in. Full time seniority, benefits, pension. In exchange I have to sacrifice six days a week to do the most repetitive, mindless job possible with arrogant people all around me. I make almost $70,000 a year and have a 7th grade education, it does absolutely nothing for me. Most of my family are dead, my mom committed suicide when I was 17 and my grandma just passed on Friday. Dad's a crackhead who I haven't spoken to in four years. Sometimes being successful on paper just isn't enough. I've been on a waiting list to see a psychiatrist and get diagnosed with the laundry list of things I know I have wrong with me and its been a year now. The mental health system across the globe is utterly neglected. Have some pills instead and hope it goes away or keeps you numb enough to serve society. Pretty fucked if you ask me.

 

[Linda]

I don't know if there is a term for it, but I have had a mild version of the condition you describe since I was about 16. By conventional measures, my life has gone very well, but throughout it all I would rather not have been here. I didn't feel like that so strongly that I was under pressure to ctb. It was more a matter of, if I had been given a choice to be born or not, I would certainly have chosen not, and that I will not be displeased when the Grim Reaper comes calling (whether he comes calling with my assistance or without). Although life has its good moments - and I have had many of them - basically, I have always felt that life is more hassle than it is worth.

 

[Buh-bye!]

I got the job I always wanted at the plant that created the town I was born in. Full time seniority, benefits, pension. In exchange I have to sacrifice six days a week to do the most repetitive, mindless job possible with arrogant people all around me. I make almost $70,000 a year and have a 7th grade education, it does absolutely nothing for me. Most of my family are dead, my mom committed suicide when I was 17 and my grandma just passed on Friday. Dad's a crackhead who I haven't spoken to in four years. Sometimes being successful on paper just isn't enough. I've been on a waiting list to see a psychiatrist and get diagnosed with the laundry list of things I know I have wrong with me and its been a year now. The mental health system across the globe is utterly neglected. Have some pills instead and hope it goes away or keeps you numb enough to serve society. Pretty fucked if you ask me.

honestly man, it's too fucked up. props to you for holding it together with urself.

I don't know if there is a term for it, but I have had a mild version of the condition you describe since I was about 16. By conventional measures, my life has gone very well, but throughout it all I would rather not have been here. I didn't feel like that so strongly that I was under pressure to ctb. It was more a matter of, if I had been given a choice to be born or not, I would certainly have chosen not, and that I will not be displeased when the Grim Reaper comes calling (whether he comes calling with my assistance or without). Although life has its good moments - and I have had many of them - basically, I have always felt that life is more hassle than it is worth.

words of wisdom