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imtrying

imtrying

Member
Apr 29, 2022
56
I'm not sure if I'm just crazy but right now I just want some "good enough" reason to ctb. I don't really have the words to elaborate.
 
Jrmull1993

Jrmull1993

Warlock
Jul 13, 2022
759
@imtrying

Someone actually started this thread already, it can be found here:

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/thre...g-it-will-tip-them-over-the-edge.96370/unread
 
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Reactions: Suicidebydeath
Suicidebydeath

Suicidebydeath

No chances to be happy - dead inside
Nov 25, 2021
3,345
Yes but ending it is so hard it would just result in things being worse for me.
 
D

DrWh033

Student
Dec 23, 2020
129
The reason are there and fit perfectly the concept of rational suicide, for me. ( deteriorating health and pain rendering me useless).
The thing that I need is high anger/adrenaline towards this life ( my fate, those that led me to this trauma) to do the rational thing. Seems paradoxical. But it is not.
 
Everlong

Everlong

One last chance to turn it around
Sep 7, 2022
105
It seems that is how I get most motivation these days. It's how I manage my relationships also. I've always seemed to push loved ones to find where the boundaries are. Kinda like, "Do you really love me as much as you say you do?" I push until no reasonable person could tolerate it then, "Yep. I knew you didn't." Confirmation bias of a negative bent.
 
H

Hope:-)

Enlightened
Jul 3, 2022
1,120
I did, but then it happened. Now I feel backed into a corner and see no way out. I miss not being backed into a corner.
 
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

She wished that she never existed...
Sep 24, 2020
33,377
I think that wanting things to get worse is understandable if you have a reliable method plan and the thing holding you back is the SI, as this would make it easier to actually go through with ctb. But if you don't have a method then to me the thought of life getting worse is horrifying.
 
GreyCTB

GreyCTB

Student
Aug 26, 2022
110
I think being pushed over the edge would be horrible way to go. But it's nice for practicality. I plan on going out tomorrow and I can already feel SI kicking in. I even feel guilty about CTB for the first time ever now. Like you can think rationally about ctb until you're actually about to do it, then it becomes an uphill battle where you have to pull tons of motivation out of yourself
 
H

Hope:-)

Enlightened
Jul 3, 2022
1,120
I think being pushed over the edge would be horrible way to go. But it's nice for practicality. I plan on going out tomorrow and I can already feel SI kicking in. I even feel guilty about CTB for the first time ever now. Like you can think rationally about ctb until you're actually about to do it, then it becomes an uphill battle where you have to pull tons of motivation out of yourself
Totally relate. I'm planning for 4 days time. Not sure I can go through with it but feel pushed into it.
 
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Reactions: GreyCTB
M

Muach

Member
Jan 28, 2022
54
We all have came a long way to a rational suicide; i think what is meant by something 'to push you off the edge' is to have that impulse, that energy to just do the act.

Someone on this forum said we make suicide a rocket science.

We do because we are rational, not impulsive.
 
E

Escapee

Student
Jan 14, 2023
165
We all have came a long way to a rational suicide; i think what is meant by something 'to push you off the edge' is to have that impulse, that energy to just do the act.

Someone on this forum said we make suicide a rocket science.

We do because we are rational, not impulsive.

I have made a rational decision long enough. My decisions are not by any means impulsive in fact living is impulsive to me do it when you don't want it. But lack of successful method and support from some one hold me back. I don't even want to live the next day.
 

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