Venting Emotionless what about you?

[Miss clefable]

I'm not afraid rather if i ended up like that it would only spell trouble for me in the end such as "a long painful experience"

Can I ask would you hurt someone

 

[Nephis]

Can I ask would you hurt someone

If they were to get in my way was the answer that went through my head so yes?

 

[Nofaith]

Also i have checked myself before i show at least 4 of the "symptoms" that someone with ASPD has

If they were to get in my way was the answer that went through my head so yes?

But you wouldn't just for fun?

 

[Miss clefable]

If they were to get in my way was the answer that went through my head so yes?

Even if it was minor incident

 

[Nephis]

But you wouldn't just for fun?

I think your still thinking of a psychopath i do things that benefit me hurting people needlessly could land me into problems i don't want last thing i need is to be put in the same room with a therapist

 

[Nephis]

Even if it was minor incident

Whatever would benefit me in the end after all i'm trying not to be put into a mental hospital

 

[Pointlessabyss]

Most people on this forum will most likely CTB due to them hating the lives they have such as social, academic, and career problems or at least that's what it seems to me. however i have seemingly no issues in those areas i used to be bullied yes but after a while i became cold and indifferent to even that if i am suffering then i'm suffering due to extreme apathy meaning (if i'm right) my emotions are either crippled to beyond repair or i simply just can't feel many of them. Over the years i have learned to be able to fake my emotions by observing others and copying specific parts and using them to adapt to my social surroundings in short i'm a actor wearing a mask while also playing his lines from a recorder hidden in his pocket in order to do his performance (hope you understand the metaphore). But i'm tired of that i hate seeing people be so happy while i can't even feel that i can only put on a mask that has a smile plastered onto it, for that reason i wish to die. in a way it's strange or just perhaps rare after all the main reasons for suicide tend to be the one's listed above or at least those are the ones you would have expected but tell me are you the same? i'm sure many here put on a mask to hide the feelings they wish for others to not see. But what about the people who put on that mask with nothing but a empty hollow body? I haven't be able to experience emotions well for about 8 years now or rather if i have it's been one occasion of sadness, a few of envy, and then one of hate. BUT for this entire essay on why i wish to end it all is not because of the fact i'm emotionless rather what will become of me because i am, you see i wan't you to wonder what will become of a person who has no empathy for humans or animals what could possibly happen to that person? whatever reason you most likely came up with is probably my reason for dying as well.

~Thank you for reading this far for my rant as this also serves as a perspective or maybe an idea for some on how I live

Hey, new here but I can relate to so much of what your saying! I have nothing wrong in my life as far as I can tell, I feel emotionless and get little to no satisfaction out of life anymore. Hence my being here to get the knowledge and resources to end it as peacefully as possible.

There's a few websites out there called self/modern awakening which I use to read a lot as it relates so much to my feelings of the pointless existence! Which I had accepted all them years ago.

I think a lot of people go through that stage but can ignore it / place a purpose on themselves to live.
I don't think you ll turn into a psychopath or anything as long as you still have morals and can tell between what's wrong and right. You ll just exsist with the acceptance and you ll either struggle on like I have for the last 8 years, but everyone has a breaking point!

Just thought I'd let you know your not alone with your way of thinking!

 

[Nofaith]

I think your still thinking of a psychopath i do things that benefit me hurting people needlessly could land me into problems i don't want last thing i need is to be put in the same room with a therapist

Not at all, some personality disorders mean they may susceptible to.

 

[Miss clefable]

So what is it called if I have no emotion towards myself but do for others

 

[Nephis]

Not at all, some personality disorders mean they may susceptible to.

I see thank you for your information on that topic

 

[Nephis]

So what is it called if I have no emotion towards myself but do for others

Isn't that just self-sacrificing? you don't care about what happens to yourself but you do for other's and you would even hurt your-self even if it meant helping someone else out i believe that's the correct definition that i found

 

[Caustic Cardinals]

We're all bugs now,
On the so called Humon show,
screaming dieing .
wanna be vultures lapping at blood stains on the walls.

 

[Miss clefable]

Isn't that just self-sacrificing? you don't care about what happens to yourself but you do for other's and you would even hurt your-self even if it meant helping someone else out i believe that's the correct definition that i found

I feel nothing towards myself

 

[Nephis]

I'm not sure then

 

[Miss clefable]

I'm not sure then

Well I think your lovely just been fucked over by humanity

 

[Deleted member 847]

Damn I wish I was a sociopath/psychopath. My anxiety tortures me. I care more about what others think of me than If I'm going to eat or not this month. I feel like being stuck in a reality show in which I'm forced to play the role of the biggest loser. My only choice is self termination at this point.

 

[Nofaith]

In

Damn I wish I was a sociopath/psychopath. My anxiety tortures me. I care more about what others think of me than If I'm going to eat or not this month. I feel like being stuck in a reality show in which I'm forced to play the role of the biggest loser. My only choice is self termination at this point.

Sociopaths still feel just not about others.

 

[Deleted member 847]

In


Sociopaths still feel just not about others.

So one can still be a loser while being a sociopath? Damn.

 

[Nofaith]

So one can still be a loser while being a sociopath? Damn.

We are not losers, we are lasers.

 

[Deleted member 847]

We are not losers, we are lasers.

Lucky motherfuckers. My greatest winning is surviving a day at school without having anyone bother me.

 

[Deleted member 847]

My personality is a disgusting abomination.

 

[RM5998]

Well, the armchair diagnosis would be ASPD, but it's not exactly reasonable to do that, since I'm not a psychiatrist, haven't read the DSM-V and haven't met you in person.

To some extent, I do feel that myself, the numbing of some of my emotions over time. I know I have them, they've just become somewhat inaccessible.

 

[throwaway123]

I try to supress all my emotions as much as possible. Emotions just don't help. This numbing process has left me quite emotionless you could say. It's not that I am unable to feel compassion it's more that I just don't care. Why would I? There is no meaning to life and emotions are not comparable to the laws of physics. You can die tomorrow and the sun will still shine, the earth will continue spinning just like people will continue with their lives. I also feel that to CTB you have to become emotionless in some sort of way.

 

[MachineGunDani]

U could b suppressing ur emotions to cope?

 

[user90872]

I sometimes become so hollow that I don't feel anything and I don't care about my supposed friends or loved ones. I dissociate every now and then, too. I realize that this state is troubling for majority of people experiencing it, but I don't feel it unpleasant whatsoever. Personally, I find it really soothing. It feels good not to give a fuck. By the way, I find implying that you may be a psychopath to be completely inaccurate. I think that a psychopath wouldn't be noble enough to consider whether his actions will impact other people.

 

[Caustic Cardinals]

nope I have all of the feels

 

[Nephis]

Thus far being emotionless is some what strange to say the least it's like you can never really understand what a person is thinking when they act on emotions i can only guess based upon what people say or an opinion on it this is even more hard to understand if you like me and have no empathy towards humans

 

[okyeah]

Mostly just angry and bitter these days. A little nervous too because I am committed to killing myself now and I have been a complete shut-in (besides work) for the past 2 months. I just know that this is a path that will kill my social life and any chance at having a girlfriend, future, or anything else in life completely. But it is what I genuinely want so I guess it gives me some sort of a feeling of confidence or something.

 

[Pk95]

I became kind of emotionless.. after I went through a phase of thinking , analysing about my life.. (my next step). I became completely indifferent to everything..Just faking it till the point so that no one discovers. But, when we co-exist with more people, it require more efforts to hide your pain. People are just enjoying life...When they crack a joke, you don't respond., they get suspicious after some time.. happened with me. So, I used to act that I'm completely fine,but it drains a lot of energy.So, as for me , I will not fake it for long. Hoping to ctb soon.