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I didn't know you had a romantic relationship, congrats.
Oh I thought it meant having a lot of emotional pain due to the lack of a relationship though in my case it was failed potential relationships that amplify the pain above loneliness for me.
Suspected so, you shan't disturb the sacred polls in this way! This would go into "loneliness, real".Oh I thought it meant having a lot of emotional pain due to the lack of a relationship.
Okay I changed it but what if other people's romantic relationships are also causing me pain?
That's "negative self-talk/relative social positioning" (in combination with "loneliness, real").Okay I changed it but what if other people's romantic relationships are also causing me pain?
Sounds like you're handling that pretty well emotionally, but it's tough to tell in writing of course. I don't have an income but barely any expenses since I hibernate in mom's basement. Stopped drinking, gaming, so only buy food and protein in small, inexpensive amounts. Phone (very low cost, since don't use social media or call ppl) and gym, also.
Honestly, I can take a lot, but it is very exhausting. I have lived practically 20 years with anxiety, depression, impulse phobias, etc ... If I am holding on for so long it is to exhaust all the options but, honestly, if it were not for the escape valve that alcohol is for me and that I am really close of relatives, I would have already done it. I'm honestly running out of everything, when I can't take it anymore, I will. Having SN in my possession gives me the peace of mind of being able to do it at any time. It really is a relief. If it didn't have SN, it would have to jump from somewhere. I already have a few accessible places, but I don't want my remains to trample someone. Or they have to do a corpse survey on a misshapen, bloody mass.
Sounds great to have the exit point that readily available. I'd personally find it tedious and annoying to have to fast, take antiemetics, antacids or whateverthefuck else like 48h before the actual SN or whatever is recommended. Even with N I believe antiemetics are needed, but maybe that's a simpler process. My current method is the meme-partial in the woods (that I spent my entire time here roasting), I'm constantly trying to figure out ways to make it full-suspension but shit's fucked. I don't think I have it in me to jump, tbh, the highest I've jumped is 7m into water on a school excursion haha, and that wasn't easy for me. Well, I was 13 or something, but still, not a natural daredevil.
I would jump into a drunken state, which is when I am least afraid. I know it is not recommended but I couldn't do it any other way. I was lucky to get SN although N would be better.
Oh, yeah, I just cry and get suicidal lol. Anxiety, fear and anger will surely destroy someone's health eventually (but so will just existing
).
Yes, yes. But that would not result in emotional pain directly. If someone was not affected by one of the factors listed or some equivalent factors they'd be fine with the existential shit. Maybe I'm guessing too much again, lol.
Understood and I greatly appreciate what you're saying...
Think I'd need a second brain to grasp that. Seems like an extra bad pain-source since it will never go away.
Once, in a very bad anxiety attack, my left arm fell asleep and I had pain in my chest. I took 2 aspirin and went to the ER. While I was going I took 2 xanax. In half an hour the pain was gone As the emergency room was saturated, I left. Indeed anxiety seems somewhat "mild" but it is very screwed up. I already talked in another thread about anxiety attacks on the freeway. Finding an exit to park while your hands are shaking, your heart is pounding and your pupils dilate, making your vision worse while avoiding collapse is really exhausting.
