Method Eaten by lion?

[Old]

Ok, so what if I just piss off a lion or hippo and put my head right into their mouth.

 

[Seered Doom]

Uhhhh, that'd be one of the most unreliable methods (A) and (B) on the off chance of that able to happen, they may just put the an/mal down anyway. Not worth the method

 

[locked*n*loaded]

OR, maybe just swallow a porcupine and have all your insides just torn to shreds?

 

[J&L383]

One word:

 

[Plentiful_Despair]

Why not just smear mashed bananas on your face, point at it in front of a monkey with rabies and close your eyes?

 

[potatocube]

Or maybe lock yourself in an armor with a starving rat.

 

[CatLvr]

Or maybe lock yourself in an armor with a starving rat.

Now it's my turn.

Uhmmmmm --

 

[deletedaccount30982]

Fill up a pool with hundreds of sting rays and convince them all the sting at once. Fry yourself to a crisp.

 

[Tonkpils]

Jump into a shark or piranha tank?

 

[Tesha]

Shave off your skin, roll in salt and let parrots lick you to death while they get their essential minerals

 

[Ol Messier 87]

Might as well walk into a Thai boxing club and insult everyone's mother.

 

[KillingPain267]

Don't forget to take antiemetics and benzos first

 

[Throwawayacc3]

I'm a bit of an animal nut so here goes:

Lions your odds are not great. You must have seen how domestic cats something "play" with their "food" (mice, rats, etc). Eventually they get bored of it and go off and do something else. Lions and lionesses will only go for you if they are hungry and need to feed. Most of the time they are bored and just find things to amuse themselves.

Ok. Now Hippos. Very very high chance. The animal that kills the most people in Africa isn't lions, crocodiles, venomous creatures…. It's hippos. They don't mess around and will obliterate you even if you aren't food. Watch a video of how little pressure it takes them to crush a watermelon.

I'm not a betting person but the odds are way higher with a hippo.

Edit: ultimately humans are dumb pieces of shit and we'll all wipe each other out eventually. Birds are the evolutionary masters along with sharks rather than us stupid apes. They'll be here once we are long gone.

 

[Avril]

Nasty way to go. Why not towel + door hinge/knob + partial suspension? Shouldn't cost you $30.

 

[shadow999]

Ug it would hurt so bad like the animals would probably have no empathy for you might just get injured

 

[BoulderSoWhat]

Just make sure this is playing when it happens lol