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I

Its like that

Member
Dec 15, 2021
23
Ive been suffering from chronic insomnis for over 3 years and its so fuckin bad that im literally fighting for my life every night. Ive taking medication that only helps for a few days, ive called the ambulance on many occasions and lost my mental faculties a few times over this bullshit. The only reason i wanna ctb is because im drying from this crap. My body is breaking and im starting to think my case is fatal. Fuck that, i dont wanna die some slow painful suffering in silence shit death. Im literrally drinking myself drunk to knock myself out. Im doing all i can to survive, but not sleeping chooses to take my life. I cant wait for my SN to get here. Im not doing another year on this god forsaken planet. A body that refuses to sleep is killing me day by day. Id rather go my own way through poison. I deserve much more than this fate. Its unbearable.
 
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fox_wannabe

fox_wannabe

Enlightened
Jul 7, 2021
1,112
Sorry that you go through all of this
 
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J

Julgran

Enlightened
Dec 15, 2021
1,427
Ive been suffering from chronic insomnis for over 3 years and its so fuckin bad that im literally fighting for my life every night. Ive taking medication that only helps for a few days, ive called the ambulance on many occasions and lost my mental faculties a few times over this bullshit. The only reason i wanna ctb is because im drying from this crap. My body is breaking and im starting to think my case is fatal. Fuck that, i dont wanna die some slow painful suffering in silence shit death. Im literrally drinking myself drunk to knock myself out. Im doing all i can to survive, but not sleeping chooses to take my life. I cant wait for my SN to get here. Im not doing another year on this god forsaken planet. A body that refuses to sleep is killing me day by day. Id rather go my own way through poison. I deserve much more than this fate. Its unbearable.

I'm truly disheartened by your story. I would be interested in knowing if you are taking anything else to soothe you when going to sleep - such as alcohol - because that can definitely have a negative effect on sleep.
 
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Snake of Eden

Snake of Eden

“Ye shall be as gods..🍎 🐍”
Jun 22, 2021
2,473
Insomnia is one of the worst things that I bet is responsible to many suicides out there. It is literal hell on earth not to be able to take a decent daily break from this hideous purgatory. Please try and find something that would help you sleep even if you will end ip ctb at least dont suffer until then
 
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cambrai33

cambrai33

Traveller
Nov 3, 2021
386
Chronic insomnia was the incubator that put my mind in the place it is now, I completely get how you must feel and I wish I knew of a solution that would at least lesson the symptoms for you
 
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gottago222

gottago222

paranoia bae
Dec 21, 2021
275
i know your pain OP. when there are too many hours in the day to go crazy i legit want to die too
 
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Crazy4u

Crazy4u

Enlightened
Sep 29, 2021
1,318
Lack of sleep is terrible for your body and mind. It makes you tired so quickly the entire day. Are you taking any supplements or medications for insomnia?
 
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Misery99

Misery99

Student
May 12, 2020
164
I can't sleep either. It's so frustrating 😥
 
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I

Its like that

Member
Dec 15, 2021
23
Lack of sleep is terrible for your body and mind. It makes you tired so quickly the entire day. Are you taking any supplements or medications for insomnia?
Thank you. Ive been on so many diff kinds. Anti psychotic and normal sleeping pills. They wear of after 3 days or so. Im so fuckin tired of it. Like God kill me quick.
Lack of sleep is terrible for your body and mind. It makes you tired so quickly the entire day. Are you taking any supplements or medications for insomnia?
Ive been on a couple yes. They seem to wear off after a bit of luck. Last night i drank 2 huge bottles of guiness and some EnJ brandy just to knock me out. Im fightin for my fuckin life every night. Im going to the doctor now again to try some new stuff
Chronic insomnia was the incubator that put my mind in the place it is now, I completely get how you must feel and I wish I knew of a solution that would at least lesson the symptoms for you
Thanks
Insomnia is one of the worst things that I bet is responsible to many suicides out there. It is literal hell on earth not to be able to take a decent daily break from this hideous purgatory. Please try and find something that would help you sleep even if you will end ip ctb at least dont suffer until then
Thank you very much for understanding. Im trying out another medicine today.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
42,486
That sounds very awful what you have to go through. It can be horrible being trapped in this human body as it can torture us. Nobody should have to suffer like that. Whatever happens, I wish you the best.
 
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Sunset Limited

Sunset Limited

I believe in Sunset Limited
Jul 29, 2019
1,352
Same here. I tried everything. Sleeping pills, passiflora, atarax, melatonin, dark room, vagal stimulation... I never prefer benzos or other addictive shits like barbiturates. Finally I am using mirtazapin. It works. I take 7.5 mg of it before go to the bed. Sometimes I wake up after 4-5 hours than taking 3,5 mg another dose and continue to sleep.

Still it is not a natural sleeping but thanks. Better than nothing. Living with insomnia about 7 years. I wish you can sleep well mate.
 
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WhiteRabbit

WhiteRabbit

I'm late, i'm late. For a very important date.
Feb 12, 2019
1,650
The alcohol you're drinking is making things worse, but I get it, it's a tough situation to be in. I used benzos to get to sleep. They worked for awhile but then made everything worse in the end.
 
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_Seeking

_Seeking

I'm only here for this moment
Dec 16, 2021
205
Insomnia is the worst. At one point, about 8 years ago when I was living in a different city a doctor prescribed me GHB (US brand name Xyrem), which completely knocks you out. I don't know if you are working with a doctor or can get one that will prescribe this. It's considered a last resort and wouldn't hurt to ask for it, it's approved for narcolepsy but some doctors use it off label in the US for insomnia. My insomnia eventually got better on it's own, I don't even know why but now all I take is Melatonin and on occasion a benzo.
 
Tamara Tami

Tamara Tami

Student
Sep 15, 2021
106
Same here. I tried everything. Sleeping pills, passiflora, atarax, melatonin, dark room, vagal stimulation... I never prefer benzos or other addictive shits like barbiturates. Finally I am using mirtazapin. It works. I take 7.5 mg of it before go to the bed. Sometimes I wake up after 4-5 hours than taking 3,5 mg another dose and continue to sleep.

Still it is not a natural sleeping but thanks. Better than nothing. Living with insomnia about 7 years. I wish you can sleep well mate.
be carefull mirtazapine causes brain injuries, im here cause a brain injury caused by drug damaged, i rather prefer insomnia than having a brain injury, it will makes you even more insomniac, try kratom is a super potent herb
 
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O

Onkyo74893

Member
Dec 11, 2021
94
I take 150mg of Seroquel (generic name quetiapine), for sleep. It's a drug used for sleep at that dose (and lower), it's also used as an anti-psychotic at much higher doses. But as other here have mentioned, you tend to deveop a tolerance for sleep aids, at which point they no longer work well. As others have also mentioned, drinking only helps you go to sleep, You never get a good nights sleep with too much alcohol. I don't have the self disipline to do what I know would help me sleep naturally. Get up when I wake up in the morning. I'm retired as well as depressed. I just have no reason to get up first thing in the morning.
 
GentleJerk

GentleJerk

Carrot juice pimp.
Dec 14, 2021
1,372
Insomnia is nothing short of torture. I'm truly sorry you are experiencing it on a daily basis, can't even begin to imagine how rough that must be!

A few weeks ago I suddenly couldn't sleep for two nights in a row. I lay in bed all night long with my eyes closed but not falling asleep for even one minute. By the time the sun came up on the first day, I felt unbelievably awful and could not think or function whatsoever for the entire day.

On the second day of no sleep at all, I was extremely afraid thinking my brain was not going to let me sleep ever again and had a breakdown, went almost completely bonkers. If I had to deal with that frequently I don't know what I would do.

I can't believe you have dealt with this for so long! You must have a huge amount of inner strength
 
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Death is beautiful

Death is beautiful

Warlock
May 20, 2021
792
I sleep for about 12 hours and it helps a lot to avoid reality, I can't imagine that I couldn't sleep it would be terrible
 
eternalpeace

eternalpeace

Student
Dec 19, 2021
139
I really, really hope you manage to find some relief. I have insomnia, though not as bad as you do. I tried many things, but I'm finally doing ok on my current regimen of four different sedatives, one of which is an old school sedative that Drs are hesitant to prescribe, and I was very lucky to get a Dr who was willing to let me try it. If medical marijuana is legal where you live and you haven't yet tried it, I would suggest talking to the Dr about it if it is something you would consider. When my 4 sedatives don't work, some cannabis usually does the trick, and I find it is far more effective at inducing sleep than alcohol, but that could be just me.
Thank you. Ive been on so many diff kinds. Anti psychotic and normal sleeping pills. They wear of after 3 days or so. Im so fuckin tired of it. Like God kill me quick.

Ive been on a couple yes. They seem to wear off after a bit of luck. Last night i drank 2 huge bottles of guiness and some EnJ brandy just to knock me out. Im fightin for my fuckin life every night. Im going to the doctor now again to try some new stuff

Thanks

Thank you very much for understanding. Im trying out another medicine today.
 
Ethereal Knight

Ethereal Knight

Seja um bom soldado, morra onde você caiu.
Jan 10, 2022
816
be carefull mirtazapine causes brain injuries, im here cause a brain injury caused by drug damaged, i rather prefer insomnia than having a brain injury, it will makes you even more insomniac, try kratom is a super potent herb
mirtazapine causes brain injuries? wow. I didn't know that. that's pretty serious.
do you have any referencies for that info? (I'm not confrontating, I really just want to know more about this.) thank you!
 
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MyChoiceToLeave

MyChoiceToLeave

Psychiatry Destroyed My Life
Jul 4, 2020
69
At this point Xyrem and the newer version Xywav are the only two options I have left for my total insomnia. I have a doctors appointment soon but I don't know if I can even make it and even if I do they only prescribe it for cataplexy and narcolepsy and the price per month even with insurance I think is in the five figure range still!
 

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