![Abbadab](/data/avatars/l/26/26172.jpg?1705045660)
Abbadab
Member
- Feb 9, 2021
- 13
I'm a relatively sane adult as well as a sexually dominant woman with many fellow femdom friends. I've also been in multiple LDRs.
Any relationship destined to last, let alone happily, is a two way street. That doesn't mean it's literally transactional, but it means both of you are providing love and care for one another in a way that's emotionally sustainable for both parties. Caretaking even for the most functional of disabled people is unbelievably brutal mentally and physically and is completely different from even a 24/7 BDSM dynamic. Even if a person has the finances to pull it off, doing it for decades on end completely breaks a person. If understanding this doesn't make your heart break for your girlfriend, then she deserves a million times better.
Also, you can be with someone in an LDR year after year, but until you've been with them in a long-term domestic situation, you have no idea what you're getting into. I'm saying this as someone who has fallen into this exact trap.
Yes, your parents should've loved you unconditionally, but that's not how adult love works, and no matter how stunted/hurt you are, your actions now have the consequences of an adult's. I'm in the same boat (see my name), but now it's my job to heal and end the generations-long cycle of suffering.
As others have pointed out, there's no way to truly mentally revert. Even if there was, the best case scenario for you would be your girlfriend sacrificing everything she ever could have had in life and becoming a husk of a person to babysit you. The best case scenario for her, which I'd find more likely, is that she'd gtfo. Even the biggest doormats put their foot down eventually.
Any relationship destined to last, let alone happily, is a two way street. That doesn't mean it's literally transactional, but it means both of you are providing love and care for one another in a way that's emotionally sustainable for both parties. Caretaking even for the most functional of disabled people is unbelievably brutal mentally and physically and is completely different from even a 24/7 BDSM dynamic. Even if a person has the finances to pull it off, doing it for decades on end completely breaks a person. If understanding this doesn't make your heart break for your girlfriend, then she deserves a million times better.
Also, you can be with someone in an LDR year after year, but until you've been with them in a long-term domestic situation, you have no idea what you're getting into. I'm saying this as someone who has fallen into this exact trap.
Yes, your parents should've loved you unconditionally, but that's not how adult love works, and no matter how stunted/hurt you are, your actions now have the consequences of an adult's. I'm in the same boat (see my name), but now it's my job to heal and end the generations-long cycle of suffering.
As others have pointed out, there's no way to truly mentally revert. Even if there was, the best case scenario for you would be your girlfriend sacrificing everything she ever could have had in life and becoming a husk of a person to babysit you. The best case scenario for her, which I'd find more likely, is that she'd gtfo. Even the biggest doormats put their foot down eventually.