Help Don’t know what to do next

[brokenxtheory]

I have tried to hard to bypass the pain. I've been using a boxcutter on my face, neck, and legs. Yesterday I gave myself the deepest cut on my leg I've ever done. The pain is too much. I'm terrified of going deeper. I'm anemic, so I bleed more.

I don't have access to anything to make this as humane as possible. My family refuses to put my cash on a card (I only has about 100 bucks in cash) so I can purchase items. I just want stuff to numb the pain (I have 2 numbing creams that I stupidly thought would work somewhat) while I do it, or something to end me faster with as little as possible. So while my mom pretends to be heartbroken, I've been experiencing the worst physical and emotional pain of my life. I'm incredibly nauseated and currently can't walk upright.

Anyone with any products or live nearby that I can give the cash to, please speak up. I'm in Jersey.

 

[FuneralCry]

That sounds like a horrible way to try and die to me, it's beyond cruel and dreadful how people cannot just easily leave this existence in peace but anyway I hope you eventually find freedom from all the suffering.

 

[brokenxtheory]

That sounds like a horrible way to try and die to me, it's beyond cruel and dreadful how people cannot just easily leave this existence in peace but anyway I hope you eventually find freedom from all the suffering.

I'm in a lot of pain. But I have no source on the outside. I'm looking for someone near me to get one of those gift cards so I can give them cash back. I need a card to buy stuff online, I want to try the nitrogen bag option (heard it's painless), but my family won't help in any way (understandable).