Doesn’t matter

[colkatt2928]

Hate living with a passion not only am I jealous of those who die, I'm also jealous of those who live and actual enjoy things and aren't lonely and miserable, but who cares I guess cause once you're dead you won't be feeling much of anything

 

[jodes2]

There is that. How long have you felt like this my friend? Sorry you're suffering

 

[colkatt2928]

There is that. How long have you felt like this my friend? Sorry you're suffering

for a long time now, it almost feels like my whole life cause can't remember ever feeling normal, thank you for your compassion

 

[Dizzylady80]

for a long time now, it almost feels like my whole life cause can't remember ever feeling normal, thank you for your compassion

It's real easy to forget how it is to feel better. Loneliness is so painful, I'm sorry hon ❤ your pain does matter

 

[colkatt2928]

Thank you so much for understanding

 

[FuneralCry]

I personally only envy those who cease to exist, I always have done, I mean they don't have to carry the burden that is existence anymore and are free from everything. As long as someone exists they are capable of suffering and to me that's nothing to envy. I always envy those who succeed at ctb and wish that it's me, but unfortunately I'm still trapped here.

It's true that none of our thoughts and feelings really matter to us once we are gone, of course it would be impossible for them to matter as we won't be there at that point. The fact that to die solves all problems is exactly what makes the thought of it so appealing, I simply never want to have to think about any of this and I never want to experience anything ever again. I only wish for permanent non existence for all eternity.

 

[Lostblackchild]

I hate life. Boring as fuck. Would rather die then live in this shitty world. If I could speed up time and die I would. Previously purchased a rope and SN. A couple years removed from that. Still shitty life. Want to get high.

 

[NoHorizon]

Jealousy is totally understandable - everyone has a right to happiness so when you see other people happy it provokes that "well why can't I have that too?" response. I'm sorry you're suffering - loneliness is horrible.

 

[Whole-Ad]

Life is boring and I don't understand how people do it. They wake up and do the same shit everyday and even when I'm doing something new, I don't look forward to it. Purely because I don't find anything enjoyable anymore. I'm 22 and not even half way done with this life yet. I'm on 3 different antidepressants and I'm not gonna lie they have lifted my mood slightly but they haven't even nearly 'fixed' me. I'm being discharged from hospital after a year and a half in 2 weeks and I feel so guilty because I know things are gonna go back to how they were before I was admitted.