
CameronFrye
There’s nothing there
- Feb 20, 2022
- 79
I don't know why but I'm always hoping for colder weather and become more depressed as it gets warmer. It's strange because I do feel some relief from more sunlight and more time outdoors. However I feel my overall depression worsens if that makes sense.
My theory is this goes back to when I was younger. I grew up in an area where sports were everything. As soon as Spring came along all my friends disappeared into their sports lives. They either had practice, private training, or games daily after school and all day on weekends because of how competitive it was. And when school ended they spent summers traveling the country competing. Multiple of my neighbors even got full scholarships to play sports at top colleges. My brothers were a part of this and I'd have to spend my free time watching them practice/play. Meanwhile I was not athletic at all and never made a sports team and never got to participate.
During the winter the other kids had much more free time and we'd play videogames, watch movies, and have fun together inside and I was happier as a result.
As we got older they eventually preferred to spend all their time around their athletic friends as they developed stronger and stronger bonds with them over the years due to all the time they spent together. Also as a social hierarchy developed the athletes were at the top, and I became someone who would lower their status. Some of them even ended up bullying me.
We all graduated awhile ago and I don't interact with them anymore and I have a much different life, but I still get a feeling of dread as the weather gets warmer.
Does anyone else feel their depression worsens this time of year?
My theory is this goes back to when I was younger. I grew up in an area where sports were everything. As soon as Spring came along all my friends disappeared into their sports lives. They either had practice, private training, or games daily after school and all day on weekends because of how competitive it was. And when school ended they spent summers traveling the country competing. Multiple of my neighbors even got full scholarships to play sports at top colleges. My brothers were a part of this and I'd have to spend my free time watching them practice/play. Meanwhile I was not athletic at all and never made a sports team and never got to participate.
During the winter the other kids had much more free time and we'd play videogames, watch movies, and have fun together inside and I was happier as a result.
As we got older they eventually preferred to spend all their time around their athletic friends as they developed stronger and stronger bonds with them over the years due to all the time they spent together. Also as a social hierarchy developed the athletes were at the top, and I became someone who would lower their status. Some of them even ended up bullying me.
We all graduated awhile ago and I don't interact with them anymore and I have a much different life, but I still get a feeling of dread as the weather gets warmer.
Does anyone else feel their depression worsens this time of year?