Does self-harming lower SI?

[needed_]

during the last days I spent many hours reading about survival instinct / self-preservation instinct to see if I find a way to manage mine. I came across the idea that individuals who repeatedly engaged in self-harming behaviour in a way that they physically hurt themselves - e.g., cutting really deep - are more likely to "succeed" in killing themselves because they have kind of practiced overcoming their SI. what do you guys think about it? would you agree? I haven't cut myself since 2014 but before that I did it regularly and it always had to get stitched. and I remember that always before doing it I was in a very special mental state and I can see how that might be very similar to the moment I have the SN glass in my hand and have to drink it. I hope my "experience" will help me to succeed. does anyone have similar feelings?

 

[myopybyproxy]

i self harm to obut not vey deep - ner reached fascia or nerves, only yellow blobs which i think are fat. it is impossible with the tools i have to cut much deeper than that in one stroke - unless you had surgical grade scalperl to get straight to the meat in one go - and if theyre espcailyl dull cuz ive been reusing them or i didnt put as much rpesure the first time, i have to cut within the cut i just made to get it to be satisfactorilt dep.

doing a third cut inside a cut is ddiculty - partly because i cant see where the blade is or what im doing due to the blood covering everything - so i have to force myself.

but there s a curical differnt which is that my bosy knows i dont intende to die. and i know i will not, because i dont cut deep enough to hit any artiries et.c so there is no subciounsiuos panic waiting toflost to the forefront.

then again i ahve never needd any of mine stitched and of crouse i dont know your metnal state as i am not you, so only you can answer that wuestion for yourself. but i hope my input was helpful despte typos. sorry about that btw but i cant be arsed to fix them so here ou go.

 

[needed_]

i self harm to obut not vey deep - ner reached fascia or nerves, only yellow blobs which i think are fat. it is impossible with the tools i have to cut much deeper than that in one stroke - unless you had surgical grade scalperl to get straight to the meat in one go - and if theyre espcailyl dull cuz ive been reusing them or i didnt put as much rpesure the first time, i have to cut within the cut i just made to get it to be satisfactorilt dep.

doing a third cut inside a cut is ddiculty - partly because i cant see where the blade is or what im doing due to the blood covering everything - so i have to force myself.

but there s a curical differnt which is that my bosy knows i dont intende to die. and i know i will not, because i dont cut deep enough to hit any artiries et.c so there is no subciounsiuos panic waiting toflost to the forefront.

then again i ahve never needd any of mine stitched and of crouse i dont know your metnal state as i am not you, so only you can answer that wuestion for yourself. but i hope my input was helpful despte typos. sorry about that btw but i cant be arsed to fix them so here ou go.

thanks, no you're right I actually meant what you're describing. cutting not in a way that you might die from it, just deep enough that it takes you a certain amount of emotional pain to actually do it.

 

[Bedrock48]

I definitely have noticed a lowering in my SI and overall self preservation when self harming. There's 100% been times where once it gets to a certain point I stop caring about the damage I'm doing or blood I'm losing.

Not sure if it lowers my SI outside of that time though but it's something I've thought of doing before an attempt.

 

[Gray Wounds]

hmm... this is interesting. I, too, had been a self-harmer for years and my cuts were pretty deep but not deep enough to kill. My method before involved slitting the radial artery. I did not manage to hit it though it was a near miss. Now, did the self-harming made the attempt easier? In my experience, no. I treat self-harm the way people play russian roulette. If it hits a vein then "well done". If it misses, then, "try again". What I am pointing out to is the lack of assurance as to what will happen next (as well as the existence of hope that life will get better, eventually, because sh makes me feel hopeful and calm). While doing my suicide attempt, I am going for the kill and know that it will either end my life or it will cause severe damage to my physique. If I am going to be honest here, I do not think it is about survival instinct at all. In my case before, I felt so mad and considered my "dying" to be an injustice to my existence. I do not want to survive but since I never tried any option that could cause change to my situation, I thought, "what if?" And now that I have tried those "what ifs" and is still not satisfied (things just got worse) with the results, I am planning on attempting again for the... well, third, serious time. Will I finally die this time around? The answer might be a yes or it might be a no. Depending on certain circumstances (such as being found, having thwarting events).

 

[HappyForever?]

The Blue Whale Challenge involves self harm and is reportedly quite effective in inducing suicide, so I guess it does.