Discussion Does everyone here have a shitty life or are some of us just sick in the head? I know it can be both.

[whenwillthepainstop]

I feel like a bad life is a huge reason why people want to CTB, is that the case for EVERYONE though? Think about it, if you had everything you ever wanted even if it's impossible or something in this current universe, imagine having the life you dreamed of. Would you still want to die? I think most peoples lives aren't good enough so it makes sense why people want to end it, I'm not saying that's a good thing just stating an observation. I want to die bc my shitty life gave me mental illness.

 

[Jisatsu]

I think a lot of my upbringing and trauma I've experienced in my life has set me to be how I am today. I've always had depression but because it was untreated for so long it caused me to gain more mental issues through my life.

I feel that most people are molded into how they are by the environment and society they've been raised in and that impacts how they turn out.

 

[Wolf Girl]

Money would fix most of my problems. It reminds me of Squid Game where the players have the option to vote to end the games, but people keep voting to continue playing death games for money rather than return to the real world and their crippling debts.

 

[Manfrotto99]

My abusive upbringing and trauma and role as the the family scapegoat has resulted in a shitty life that has led me to CBT. Ie. It has caused me to go through life with severe low self esteem and the belief that I am not good enough for anyone and anything....which simply created a life that has reflected that and led me into continous rejection and financial poverty. Confidence gets us a long way in this life. Some people do break free of their family roles, especially if they have money, looks, charm, extroverted personality, talent, intelligence or some combination of that which is regarded and considered favourable by society. I dont think it takes much really. But some of us lack it all and stand little chance. I think all we can do then is either accept our lot or CBT. I think It's just survival of the fittest.

Money would fix most of my problems. It reminds me of Squid Game where the players have the option to vote to end the games, but people keep voting to continue playing death games for money rather than return to the real world and their crippling debts.

I'm the same, money would stop me from CBT. Money is considered a finite resource that every single on of us fights and contends for over others. I think the ones who are disadvantaged are usually prayed on and sent further down so that others can have more, though the extend of this would depend on what else they may have to offer society or the family unite, that compensates or contributes to resources and power.

 

[Pale_Rider]

Sometimes a shitty life can even cause a broken mind.

 

[whenwillthepainstop]

I think a lot of my upbringing and trauma I've experienced in my life has set me to be how I am today. I've always had depression but because it was untreated for so long it caused me to gain more mental issues through my life.

I feel that most people are molded into how they are by the environment and society they've been raised in and that impacts how they turn out.

I experienced that too! It's so difficult because some people are truly sick, nothing could've saved them but I know if my life was different years ago, I would've had a chance at being happy.

Sometimes a shitty life can even cause a broken mind.

Yes, you're right. This is what happened to me.

 

[FadingSnowFake]

Shitty life, or more a series of events which were too much for my mind to deal with.

 

[Manfrotto99]

Sometimes a shitty life can even cause a broken mind.

Yes my story.

 

[Pale_Rider]

Yes my story.

Me too.

 

[SoulCage]

What even is a good life? What is what I always wanted?
I have achieved things that I wanted. They were good in theory but... Bad in practice. It fucked me up. I hate wanting things because I don't know what they will actually get me. Everything is a risk, because it's impossible to predict it.
"What I always wanted" - maybe I just want the concept. I want security. I don't want pain. I don't want to be tired. But I don't know how to achieve that with real means.
It's impossible.

 

[battensankakumaru]

I feel like a bad life is a huge reason why people want to CTB, is that the case for EVERYONE though? Think about it, if you had everything you ever wanted even if it's impossible or something in this current universe, imagine having the life you dreamed of. Would you still want to die? I think most peoples lives aren't good enough so it makes sense why people want to end it, I'm not saying that's a good thing just stating an observation. I want to die bc my shitty life gave me mental illness.

although i dont have everything i want, i am just sick in the head. I've been spoiled rotten at a young and have faced no hardships that weren't made by myself which is probably why im afraid of dying. I feel so disgusting that I wanna get over my fear of death so I can catch the bus bc of how good my life is. ik I dont belong here yet I still come back when I wanna find the courage to end it all

 

[whenwillthepainstop]

although i dont have everything i want, i am just sick in the head. I've been spoiled rotten at a young and have faced no hardships that weren't made by myself which is probably why im afraid of dying. I feel so disgusting that I wanna get over my fear of death so I can catch the bus bc of how good my life is. ik I dont belong here yet I still come back when I wanna find the courage to end it all

I understand the feeling of not belonging but you don't need to prove your suffering here. Don't beat yourself up over feeling this way even if you don't think your life was "bad enough".

 

[Daphne]

I wanted to believe I could change my hard luck through the power of intention like therapists and self-help gurus preach.

I realized that's a sham and sometimes a person is going to continue to lead a hard life because they may be disadvantaged in some way, like being poor, or being without good looks/smarts/talent/charisma/confidence and there's few opportunities to turn that ship around. Then they feel resigned at some point and don't have the energy yo keep swimming upstream.

Working hard with nothing to show in return is a fool's game.

 

[NeoN0va]

Shitty life it is. The amount of trauma ive had to go through during my entire life was just too much to handle myself, and soon enough my mind started to just collapse.

 

[WrathfulGloom32]

I hate all the evil in the world and how it beat me down to it's level; so shitty life I guess.

 

[fallendevil]

I think it's both

95% of my issues are caused by my neurodivergence, I am fundamentally incorrect. There is always a wall of disconnect from the world that I feel so deeply, and it won't cease until I die.

I was also an accident aka an "experiment" for my parents so I saw all of their unfortunate parenting failures and it's too late for me to recover from it.

 

[Manfrotto99]

What even is a good life? What is what I always wanted?
I have achieved things that I wanted. They were good in theory but... Bad in practice. It fucked me up. I hate wanting things because I don't know what they will actually get me. Everything is a risk, because it's impossible to predict it.
"What I always wanted" - maybe I just want the concept. I want security. I don't want pain. I don't want to be tired. But I don't know how to achieve that with real means.
It's impossible.

I guess it's subjective, but one where my basic needs are met would be a start.

 

[kopebaldy]

I live a decent life, way more comfortable than a lot of people in my country tbh. Work is tough but it pays... okay-ish.

So it's definitely my brain that is broken lol.

 

[whenwillthepainstop]

I live a decent life, way more comfortable than a lot of people in my country tbh. Work is tough but it pays... okay-ish.

So it's definitely my brain that is broken lol.

But is there a REASON it is broken? Maybe your life is decent now but was it bad in the past?

 

[kopebaldy]

But is there a REASON it is broken? Maybe your life is decent now but was it bad in the past?

Eh... my brain has always been broken, I just don't have the motivation or energy left to keep it contained.

Family was poor when I was born but gradually we got better, not wealthy or anything, we can't buy luxury shit but making enough to not be stressed ab the next meal or bill or tuition or whatever, typical living expenses.

Like I said, decent.

 

[whenwillthepainstop]

Eh... my brain has always been broken, I just don't have the motivation or energy left to keep it contained.

Family was poor when I was born but gradually we got better, not wealthy or anything, we can't buy luxury shit but making enough to not be stressed ab the next meal or bill or tuition or whatever, typical living expenses.

Like I said, decent.

Not to sound cliche but have you tried treatment? I don't just mean therapy and meds but there is so much new treatment nowadays for mental illness, I hear ketamine is very promising for suicidal thoughts. Can't speak from personal experience though as I've never tried.

 

[kopebaldy]

Not to sound cliche but have you tried treatment? I don't just mean therapy and meds but there is so much new treatment nowadays for mental illness, I hear ketamine is very promising for suicidal thoughts. Can't speak from personal experience though as I've never tried.

I appreciate the thoughts mate, but I've already decided.

Besides, living here, any form of psychotherapy is expensive as shit, my friend tried a few and said they're useless, only told him what he knows already.

Even if I can afford them and get "better", what's the point? Not like I can restart the last 30 years, I've made enough mistakes and caused enough griefs, it's better this way.

 

[Forever Sleep]

It's an interesting question. It seems simple on the face of it but, I don't think it is. Comparatively speaking, I probably don't have a shitty life. My health isn't too bad. Thanks to inheritance, I am able to live independently and I could afford to pursue the education I wanted and, more or less, eventually land the job I wanted. The things I don't have- close friendships and relationships, I have chosen to neglect.

But, I'm (obviously) not happy. I'm tired of working- even though it's what I wanted to do. I'm tired of the pressures of having to financially and practically sustain this life. Really then- it comes down to a question: 'Is it shitty to be expected to work to sustain life or, is that a reasonable expectation to put on someone?' Am I 'mentally ill' because I resent having to comply with this world?

In a weird way, I'm not so sure either apply to me. My life isn't excessively shitty- although I have a lot of shitty childhood baggage. I'm not convinced I'm mentally ill either. Not debilitatingly so anyway. I'm just tired mostly.

 

[Akashaaa]

I'm a bad apple. My parents gave me everything.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

My life is not shitty, nor am I sick in the head. I just don't like being alive.

 

[nowherelilies]

shitty life made me sick in the head ♡ no good family, no support system, no stability in life, feeling like my life is always in "transitional period" whether it's work or relationships, no good relationship experience.

 

[MF_D00M]

My home situation is quite difficult but I'm good at ignoring it. In fact I had a pretty bright lightweight life until I relapsed to all of my addictions right before my finals 2 months ago. Too much stress and isolation makes your mind think in a very strange way, ever since that moment I kept making one dumb decision after the other and now I'm on this website because I'm convinced I'll never recover the passion for life that I once had.

 

[FuneralCry]

For me ceasing to exist is actually something positive, there's no illness in not wanting to be burdened with this torturous and futile existence just to die in agony from old age, I find it horrific how a human can suffer for so long just to face the extreme torture of old age with no limit as to how much pain they can feel.

I find it so terrible how this existence was even imposed at all and I'd never wish to be conscious of anything at all, I wish to cease existing as all I want is peace from the abomination of existence, I find it so deeply undesirable to exist in every way, I'd never want to exist, I always find it a burden to exist and it's a burden so unnecessary and futile that just causes and brings so much suffering.

 

[idiotmother]

Psych drug damage and now being stuck on even more drugs. I wanted to stay alive for family but it's getting increasingly harder to do that. My legs feel restless and there's this inner agitation, anxiety and anhedonia which is just getting worse with each day. I'm such a fool, my family deserves better. About to traumatize a whole bunch of lovely people because I fucked my brain up and no one understand because they're not me. I'll be remembered as a monster for killing myself, no one will care about the inner pain and bodily torture that brought me there.

 

[unluckysadness]

Very very very very very very very very shitty life (being disabled doesn't help). Of course I have mental issues too.