You absolutely do not want to rush anything - that's when mistakes happen and you might end up with all of the problems you have now, but compounded with possible physical damage from the attempt.
For example if that cord or your anchor breaks after, let's say 10 minutes. You would be still alive, and most likely a vegetable for the rest of your life with severe brain damage.
This very well could be the biggest decision you make, and it's a very final decision - it should not be rushed.
I hope you find peace in whatever you do.