zeek

zeek

omg mokocchi
Oct 18, 2023
138
like i do like the things im into. but it always feels like i only like them because its what everyone else likes, or its whats "niche". I always feel like a poser about everything and I feel like nothing that I do like resonates with me or is unique to me. I cant find anything thats really me.
 
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carnivalforone

carnivalforone

Experienced
Sep 29, 2023
244
i was having a bit of a meltdown thinking about all the bad things about me, my looks my height my living situation, and then told myself "at least i have good music taste" but then i thought about how loathe and pink floyd and metallica and mbv and all these things are relatively common like youd say niche so im not special in that regard as well. my point is i know exactly what you mean i guess just experiment and go out of your way to find things that would only be you.
 
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zeek

zeek

omg mokocchi
Oct 18, 2023
138
i was having a bit of a meltdown thinking about all the bad things about me, my looks my height my living situation, and then told myself "at least i have good music taste" but then i thought about how loathe and pink floyd and metallica and mbv and all these things are relatively common like youd say niche so im not special in that regard as well. my point is i know exactly what you mean i guess just experiment and go out of your way to find things that would only be you.
i love loathe and mbv, ig that just adds to the problem 😭😭
 
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Abandoned Character

Abandoned Character

(he./him)
Mar 24, 2023
261
On their own, my interests aren't that unique. There are plenty of people that enjoy the things I do, but very very few people enjoy all the things that I do. I like to think about my personality as a collection of things rather than one thing or another, helps me realize that I can bring a unique perspective to the world and those around me.

I remember feeling very similar to you, "I am nothing but a chameleon" I told myself, "I am merely mimicking those around me to fit in, sacrificing parts of me that I fear would repel others." But I realize now that as a human being, I am a social creature. It's okay to want to fit in and modifying our behavior to do so. I realized that the parts of me that I was sacrifcing were still there, just muted under certain circumstances, kind of like code switching, and that wasn't necessarily a bad thing.

Frankly, any person's interests are not theirs, and one would be full of themselves to think otherwise. It's the collection of interests, experiences, and circumstances that make us interesting. That's my view, anyway, take from that what you will. cheers~
 
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W

winamp

Enlightened
May 20, 2023
1,358
yes, but in terms of survival and success that others want for me and the success I want for myself

for example I have regular hobbies and interests/topics I generally enjoy and feel unique to me in someway or I enjoy them and they happen to help me connect with others

but then I always have 1 to 3 extra hobbies that I enjoy due to the fear of not being successful after college (even though I genuinely enjoyed them without that being in the picture) or because everyone else is fearful that I won't be successful after college and put pressure on me to do so and mostly care about the money behind a major/degree rather than the interest I may have in it and enjoyment

which is understandable but I wish things weren't that way and it makes me not enjoy those hobbies as much because success and money are brought into question when others see what hobbies I enjoy or do in my free time without the thought of a future in that hobby or getting monetary gain from it

but I feel/think many may also deal with this especially after highschool and entering college
(how can this skill/hobby/interesting make me money or guarantee me success?)
 
Pachy

Pachy

The Unfortunate Son
Oct 19, 2023
13
I didn't know people felt similar. I don't think I couldn't have put it better myself. Do you feel this way about carriers too? anytime someone talks to me about getting some type of college education or finding a carrier they ask me what I like or what i'm interested in. Nothing I like I really like though. It's either a distraction or just something I kinda do to fit in or adhere to an image.
 
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vitbar

vitbar

Escaped Lunatic
Jun 4, 2023
353
I have something similar, but also different. I feel like an imposter when speaking about the things I like. As if I don't really like them enough. As if true fans will find me out. Thing is I really am into these things.
 
zeek

zeek

omg mokocchi
Oct 18, 2023
138
I didn't know people felt similar. I don't think I couldn't have put it better myself. Do you feel this way about carriers too? anytime someone talks to me about getting some type of college education or finding a carrier they ask me what I like or what i'm interested in. Nothing I like I really like though. It's either a distraction or just something I kinda do to fit in or adhere to an image.
love julie
yes i absolutely do feel the same about careers, i have no idea what i want
 
ClaudeCTTE

ClaudeCTTE

Misunderstood...
Aug 22, 2023
264
It happens to me with university careers. Since I was a child, I always had an interest in various professions, but it turned out that I liked those professions simply because people told me they paid well. Therefore, I never focused on those careers but on money, because unfortunately, I live in a place where people only care about having money and social status.

When I talk about careers I like for what they are, people tell me I'll starve to death.
After all the nonsense people said, I lost the motivation to study and became a NEET.

On the other hand, I hate having to conform to society's expectations. I don't like pretending to be someone I'm not.
Sometimes, I've even started labeling the people around me as NPCs because basically, they all dress the same, have the same interests, and follow current trends. Where I live, people love soccer, enjoy drinking beer, and always go to pray on Sundays.
Due to my interests, I ended up being labeled as a 'weirdo.'

"They laugh at me because I'm different; I laugh at them because they're all the same".
 
zeek

zeek

omg mokocchi
Oct 18, 2023
138
It happens to me with university careers. Since I was a child, I always had an interest in various professions, but it turned out that I liked those professions simply because people told me they paid well. Therefore, I never focused on those careers but on money, because unfortunately, I live in a place where people only care about having money and social status.

When I talk about careers I like for what they are, people tell me I'll starve to death.
After all the nonsense people said, I lost the motivation to study and became a NEET.

On the other hand, I hate having to conform to society's expectations. I don't like pretending to be someone I'm not.
Sometimes, I've even started labeling the people around me as NPCs because basically, they all dress the same, have the same interests, and follow current trends. Where I live, people love soccer, enjoy drinking beer, and always go to pray on Sundays.
Due to my interests, I ended up being labeled as a 'weirdo.'

"They laugh at me because I'm different; I laugh at them because they're all the same".
girls last tour 🥰
absolutely, i never really understand what i want in a career or what i want in general.
its at its worst when trying to understand what i want to make or what i want to have.
 
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NeedAnEscape

NeedAnEscape

awaiting the end
Oct 16, 2023
250
I just feel like I'm not enough of a person. My main interest is writing, but it's such an individualized, personal activity. Nobody can really see the extent of my work, so it's often not recognized. I know people who are interested in more observable talents like art, photography, and baking, who have found more success than I ever have. Everyone else in my life is also incredibly busy, while I rarely have much to do in the evenings. I feel as though I'm a lesser person, compared to them.
 
J

Jorms_McGander

Arcanist
Oct 17, 2023
478
I don't think you're getting what you need here.

Admittedly I only scrolled 8 replies.

I don't even know what your tastes are!

Take a risk mmkay? Asking "do you not identify" is like asking "which direction does the sun rise in?"

And if you conclude you're the problem or your people are the problem because the sun rises in the east? People need to be hopping on this post, because this is not somebody with complete personal agency.
'
I know I've seen all the drama you guys wrote in stone around Tantacrul and I haven't seen nor will I see his video
Guys I was 14yo when I subbed to ruinyourlife.com, I'm still alive, turns out I have a personality disorder--I am a lot more reasonable about end of life at 36 years old

I'm gonna do what was done to me, and it wasn't wrong. The thing is, when I was a kid, the diagnoses I have didn't even exist, now here I am. Do the diligence. If you do it right then bam there's a way out should you require it
 
Kattt

Kattt

Ancient of Mu-Mu
May 18, 2021
800
Things that enjoy widespread popularity, also get much more exposure. You will see them more on TV, the news, people talk about them more etc. So you're more likely to be drawn to something that you are more familiar with and that you share as a common source of enjoyment with your peers.
If it bothers you, focus on something you enjoy and spend more time investing it.
For example, if you enjoy a particular genre of music, look beyond the artists you have already heard of and find some you haven't heard before. It helps to use platforms that give space to newer artists, such as SoundCloud/mixcloud etc.
If you enjoy fashion, maybe learn to sew and make some of your own designs.
If you enjoy dancing, maybe look for classes where you can learn different styles.
Or just be content to enjoy what you do. As long as you're happy, you don't need to explain your choices to anyone.
 
itchygator

itchygator

Member
Jan 17, 2024
36
like i do like the things im into. but it always feels like i only like them because its what everyone else likes, or its whats "niche". I always feel like a poser about everything and I feel like nothing that I do like resonates with me or is unique to me. I cant find anything thats really me.
That's why I grew up a loner. I couldn't stand the idea of being a cliche follower.
 
C

cold_severance

Student
Dec 11, 2023
139
yes, something along that way. i would describe it like if a slave has something owns something it is ultimately the property of his master. its the same thing with my interests. the only thing for me that is truly my own and uncorrupted is idea of suicide and nothing else.