Discussion Does anyone else want to ctb because they don't want to work?

[_Kaira_]

What a GREAT question - if you had the choice, stay at home, be happy, never have to work - would you even WANT a job?

Probably not, I know someone who doesn't, and has never worked in her life (now almost 500 and she's the happiest person I know.

What a tw*t.

Personally, at least for me, I'm not happy not working. Makes me feel useless and a leech upon others. I feel unfulfilled and hate being considered lazy. Even if I weren't socially awkward and constantly feeling existential dread, I'd still have to deal with a blank resume at 23. Puts a giant stunt in any type of career path I would've ever hoped to achieve.

Also doesn't help if you were to make it to old age with no retirement plan, you wouldn't have a good time. Heh.

 

[lighthousekeeper]

Yes absolutely... I can barely do anything, I could never work

 

[StringPuppet]

This is a big reason for me. I worked 1 job but I quit soon after because I hate being in public so much, I'm just that anxious.

 

[262653]

Fuck work. I have such a hard time holding my laughter when other people urge me to find a job. As others here have eloquently said, what for? It's like if others would urge me to enter a cage trap. To think of a fellow human being so lowly... I'm not sure if they realize how absurd their demands are, or do they deliberately treat me like an idiot.

 

[RottenDeer]

Kinda. On one side, I know work is a part of life and I don't have anything against my current job. It's good. But that doesn't change that I have to slave for 50 years and more for eight hours a day.

 

[Squiddy]

Fuck work. I have such a hard time holding my laughter when other people urge me to find a job. As others here have eloquently said, what for? It's like if others would urge me to enter a cage trap. To think of a fellow human being so lowly... I'm not sure if they realize how absurd their demands are, or do they deliberately treat me like an idiot.

I hate when people tell me to get a job. I would if it weren't for my bad mental health and short term memory issues and articulation issues.

 

[FatalSystemError591]

I was pushed into working despite me being disabled by my husband now about a year ago. I've somehow held that job for a year, but at the cost of my mental health, sanity and energy, and injury to my body and routines.

Plus I was all too aware of capitalism bullshit while pushed to work. And I didn't want to spend 40 hours slaving away and not getting to be myself. I knew it would be a personality and time death, and I was right. I spend 12 hours total each day commuting and working, and I have about 3-4 hours depending on the day to spend to myself and then its back to work again. The endless cycle was what I was afraid of and here I am. Slaving away so a company can prosper. At least its a small business and I know where the money goes, to my bosses, myself, and a coworker. Not some CEO getting richer and richer while im treated poorly. My bosses treat us pretty well.

My PTSD gives me nightmares and inability to sleep, its fucked up my appetite... everything that has gone wrong seems to. As much on the surface that I love my job, the mental and physical strain hardly has seemed worth it in the almost year I've been with the company. Sadly with me being disabled, the only things I really can do are similar fields of my job where its all clerical office work.

But I work in Healthcare, and with the pandemic and COVID I'm not looking forward to dealing with the general public during our business' peak season. But silently I'm hoping that it takes me out and that I can ctb by sheer accident. Then I can't be blamed for a ctb, that it was just another thing that took lives. The only problem is that if I catch it, it affects everyone I work with and the patients we see so its a huge double edged sword. Plus the chance that I may or may not live and just suffer long term.

 

[NeverGrowUp]

Fuck work. I have such a hard time holding my laughter when other people urge me to find a job. As others here have eloquently said, what for? It's like if others would urge me to enter a cage trap. To think of a fellow human being so lowly... I'm not sure if they realize how absurd their demands are, or do they deliberately treat me like an idiot.

I laugh at the notion as well, I find the whole thing to be terribly comical. You won't give me a peaceful option out... fine you get to pay for my existence through taxes, that's what you get. What's it all done for anyways? A big house? A car with some pointless "fancy features" that you sit in traffic for hours to get to and from your slave job? I refuse to surrender my life to a meaningless hamster wheel of false "achievements" and the rampant accumulation of consumer shit that provides fleeting happiness.

In short, leave me be! Not interested, no thank you

 

[Heart Shards]

I laugh at the notion as well, I find the whole thing to be terribly comical. You won't give me a peaceful option out... fine you get to pay for my existence through taxes, that's what you get. What's it all done for anyways? A big house? A car with some pointless "fancy features" that you sit in traffic for hours to get to and from your slave job? I refuse to surrender my life to a meaningless hamster wheel of false "achievements" and the rampant accumulation of consumer shit that provides fleeting happiness.

In short, leave me be! Not interested, no thank you

Hell yeah! Let those motherfuckers reap what they sow. I draw disability myself. I've spent months feeling bad, being ashamed about being a leech on society and hardworking people, but I don't feel bad anymore. If you won't allow voluntary euthanasia and you're so determined that my life is so precious, then you can pay to keep me alive.The ultimate fuck you to pro-lifers. I used to be a nice person--but the judgement of disabled people has made a part of my mind snap.

 

[BLUE1970]

Growing up I always felt I would never hold down a job, following years of substance abuse and run ins with the law I finally sobered up and entered the world of academia. After years of study, mostly in isolation, I found my perfect role...minimal social interaction, coupious amounts of time to indulge my niche interests via research and I'm paid a fairly decent salary to boot. I have been fortunate and my ASD has served me well career wise, I feel sad that others are not so fortunate.

 

[Sherri]

i work but far less, my wage was axed by 50%.

 

[NeverGrowUp]

Hell yeah! Let those motherfuckers reap what they sow. I draw disability myself. I've spent months feeling bad, being ashamed about being a leech on society and hardworking people, but I don't feel bad anymore. If you won't allow voluntary euthanasia and you're so determined that my life is so precious, then you can pay to keep me alive.The ultimate fuck you to pro-lifers. I used to be a nice person--but the judgement of disabled people has made a part of my mind snap.

They can't have it both ways right? Either life is so valuable that you'll pay to support it regardless of the "contributions" one is able to make without shaming them, or you provide them with an exit door. You shouldn't feel an ounce of shame for collecting it, working full-time is stress inducing enough for people not battling horrible conditions and you are 100% entitled to food, shelter, and a nice degree of comfort just for existing.

People who look down on you resent the fact that they aren't compensated enough for their labor, or use you as a scapegoat for the fact that a portion of their taxes goes to you. All the while billionaires aren't paying their fair share but people have been blinded by media and capitalist ethos which says they must've been "really smart" and worked so much harder to attain that level of success.

They're barking up the wrong tree and I just feel sorry for them.

 

[Rn110bg101]

The prospect that I won't be able to live with my mother forever and that I'll need to crank my life into a work soon is one of the major reasons. Even just studying is a pain at this point.

 

[Sherri]

The prospect that I won't be able to live with my mother forever and that I'll need to crank my life into a work soon is one of the major reasons. Even just studying is a pain at this point.

I feel you, it gets so hard to go to work and put a silly fake smile all day long.

 

[Heart Shards]

They can't have it both ways right? Either life is so valuable that you'll pay to support it regardless of the "contributions" one is able to make without shaming them, or you provide them with an exit door. You shouldn't feel an ounce of shame for collecting it, working full-time is stress inducing enough for people not battling horrible conditions and you are 100% entitled to food, shelter, and a nice degree of comfort just for existing.

People who look down on you resent the fact that they aren't compensated enough for their labor, or use you as a scapegoat for the fact that a portion of their taxes goes to you. All the while billionaires aren't paying their fair share but people have been blinded by media and capitalist ethos which says they must've been "really smart" and worked so much harder to attain that level of success.

They're barking up the wrong tree and I just feel sorry for them.

Yeah. They don't seem to care about my lack of quality of life, so I don't care if I take a couple of dollars out of their paycheck each week. It's usually conservatives that whine about tax dollars being spent to help the unfortunate and disabled. I guess they missed the quote by Jesus when he said, "when you help the least of these, You help me." And I only make that relevant in the fact that they spew religion as their reasoning for everything. (I'm a christian myself, but I'm not nausea induing like they are; I understand the power of choice.) So, when my conservative neighbors start inquiring why I can't get a job and why I have to live off the fat of the government (and they will literally walk up to my property while working on my garden, minding my own business) I tell them to shut the fuck up, and if they think life is so precious--they should have to pay for it, and then I say fuck you and eat fish heads and go back to my gardening.

 

[Umbrellaterm]

Definitely one of my reasons too. Fuck work and fuck the fact that we're all expected to work until we drop dead

I'm not pro life in anyway but how would society function in your opinion then?

 

[Heart Shards]

I'm not pro life in anyway but how would society function in your opinion then?

Maybe we would be better off if society didn't exist at all, since it pushes unrealistic expectations and literally pushes people to end their lives.

 

[KleinerWolf]

Yeah, me.
Working in hospitality is especially stupid.
Imagine having no higher purpose other than just staying alive, working more than 40hours a week on shitty pay, standing, waiting for that pay check at end of each week just to get by,
What's the point

 

[Umbrellaterm]

Maybe we would be better off if society didn't exist at all, since it pushes unrealistic expectations and literally pushes people to end their lives.

I completely agree and we share the same opinion, I just thought his logic was flawed.

I strongly believe the DNA is an error in nature.

 

[262653]

The way I understand it, in the modern world people mostly learn a specialty, a narrow set of things they do well enough to make others want to pay for such work. Because people usually (at least in my small circle of people) spent a fairly large portion of time working, think it's really important to find something one could enjoy more than not...

Whining and rambling: I have only interest in something that grants me immediate returns, like basics in logic, game theory, psychology, evolutionary biology, economics... everything that allows me to better understand my behavior and that of other people. I can't fathom undergoing a consistent, systematic studying and training. I can't imagine any kind of paying work I would be interested in. Also, having to do body and home maintenance, fixing things, paying bills, dealing with aggressive coworkers, employers, clients, and generally people who would hurt me in pursuing personal interests... I mean, seriously...

I've heard an interesting idea recently on YT. Figuring out all the things I do, and the motivations behind them. Figuring out what motivations are whips (do things to avoid something we don't want) and what are carrots (do things to move toward something we want). And if someone has the portion of carrots dominating the portion of whips, then chances are that person would have a high quality life, and vice versa.

I hate the fact that not doing anything brings more pain than contentment or pleasure, because of the hunger, disease, infections, muscle atrophy, and all other nasty stuff. At the same time, good things seem to require work. Such situation might be acceptable for a healthy individual with useful motivations, good genes, environment, yada yada. Knowing that such individual exists, and that my experience indicates I'm not one of them, makes me feel envy and indignation. The feeling of being treated unfairly bad (I can accept an unfairly good treatment) by the universe. Thanks to my powerful survival instinct, I'll probably have to wait until my caretakers wouldn't be able to take care of me anymore so that I would finally have face the ultimatum: work to survive or work to die.

 

[Squiddy]

So I haven't seen my therapist in a year and when I saw him yesterday, he asked me some pretty annoying questions like "are you working?" "Why aren't you working?" "You should be working" I really wanted to tell him to shut the hell up and piss off because I have my reasons for not working (my mental health and my cognition issues such as my bad short term memory and not being able to articulate myself as well). I probably could get a job, but keeping it would be extremely hard if not near impossible and I'd probably lose it within a month.

 

[Going Home]

Not my main reason, but it's a small reason of why I want to ctb. I've never actually had a job, but feel like I wouldn't be cut out to work. Between my mental illnesses, not being able to articulate myself verbally sometimes, bad short term memory and not being able to process what others are saying sometimes, I'd probably fuck up a lot. I'm definitely not cut out for life

No. I have many years work experience but my mental illness came on and I can't work a ft job with overtime like I used to. People's judgments and comments about being lazy, faking it or some other idiotic comments are enough to drive anyone to a deep suicidal emotional low.

 

[NeverGrowUp]

So I haven't seen my therapist in a year and when I saw him yesterday, he asked me some pretty annoying questions like "are you working?" "Why aren't you working?" "You should be working" I really wanted to tell him to shut the hell up and piss off because I have my reasons for not working (my mental health and my cognition issues such as my bad short term memory and not being able to articulate myself as well). I probably could get a job, but keeping it would be extremely hard if not near impossible and I'd probably lose it within a month.

Quite ridiculous on their part. Reminds me of the second appointment with my psychiatrist after she had just agreed that I have BPD and Bipolar she goes "well you don't know what you want to do that's normal... how about taking a career quiz!"
Um... what?
This unique attitude has to be seen only in this country (I'm just assuming you're in USA), where even when you try to get help they immediately want to wheel you into being "productive" and get straight to work making someone else money. My viewpoint is if these conditions are severe enough to warrant being eligible for euthanasia in certain nations, there is no way in hell I'm going to seek out employment.

The prospect that I won't be able to live with my mother forever and that I'll need to crank my life into a work soon is one of the major reasons. Even just studying is a pain at this point.

If you have qualifying mental disorders you could certainly get on some form of social welfare (assuming you're in a country that offers it) so that you wouldn't need to work. I'm not sure of your exact living situation (if its an apartment or detached home) but I've often thought about just building a tiny house on my parents land so I'm not necessarily disturbing them by living under their roof. Some people might think it's silly, but I'm sort of done caring what opinions people harbor at this point.

 

[MrOptions]

Not my main reason to CTB. But one of them. I work because I'm alone in a apartment. It keeps me busy and pays the bills. My daughter is 1000 miles away. Going through my second divorce now in my mid 40's. All I can say is life a bitch to coin the phrase.

In the end we all die. Why not sooner than later?

 

[kovkay]

Quite ridiculous on their part. Reminds me of the second appointment with my psychiatrist after she had just agreed that I have BPD and Bipolar she goes "well you don't know what you want to do that's normal... how about taking a career quiz!"
Um... what?
This unique attitude has to be seen only in this country (I'm just assuming you're in USA), where even when you try to get help they immediately want to wheel you into being "productive" and get straight to work making someone else money. My viewpoint is if these conditions are severe enough to warrant being eligible for euthanasia in certain nations, there is no way in hell I'm going to seek out employment.

My psychiatrist told me to get on disability and forget about ever working. I just came out of psychosis and into the worst depression. Out of the fire into the ice, so to say. The social worker at the hospital had no idea how to apply. She called them, they didn't pick up and she was like "ok well it's ok, we'll call tomorrow" and never did. I tried applying for disability myself but got denied. Apparently, there are lawyers and stuff which I could use, but at that point, I could barely get out of bed. Seemed like you had to basically beg for money. Well, maybe just advocate for yourself, but I had nothing to prove to anyone - all I wanted to do at that point was die.

I got hired though, and the supervisor was very understanding of my issues, as she had bpd and depression so she would let me stay home when I felt particularly low. They fired me after I got hospitalized though. I think it wasn't all due to my hospitalization. I was a poor worker, made a lot of mistakes and didn't fit in with the other people, due to my stunted and slow behaviour and issues with speech due to the antipsychotics.

My point is, sometimes there is no support for either of the paths you can take when living with a mental illness. No support in finding and securing employment and no support in getting disability, so you're just kind of in this limbo. Too sick to work, too "capable" to get money from the government. I wish I got some kind of access to an employment agency that helps people with mental issues find work. I had no idea those existed until 2 months ago which is 2 years too late.

 

[yeahwellso]

My psychiatrist told me to get on disability and forget about ever working. I just came out of psychosis and into the worst depression. Out of the fire into the ice, so to say. The social worker at the hospital had no idea how to apply. She called them, they didn't pick up and she was like "ok well it's ok, we'll call tomorrow" and never did. I tried applying for disability myself but got denied. Apparently, there are lawyers and stuff which I could use, but at that point, I could barely get out of bed. Seemed like you had to basically beg for money. Well, maybe just advocate for yourself, but I had nothing to prove to anyone - all I wanted to do at that point was die.

I got hired though, and the supervisor was very understanding of my issues, as she had bpd and depression so she would let me stay home when I felt particularly low. They fired me after I got hospitalized though. I think it wasn't all due to my hospitalization. I was a poor worker, made a lot of mistakes and didn't fit in with the other people, due to my stunted and slow behaviour and issues with speech due to the antipsychotics.

My point is, sometimes there is no support for either of the paths you can take when living with a mental illness. No support in finding and securing employment and no support in getting disability, so you're just kind of in this limbo. Too sick to work, too "capable" to get money from the government. I wish I got some kind of access to an employment agency that helps people with mental issues find work. I had no idea those existed until 2 months ago which is 2 years too late.

Can I ask what your mental illness is?

 

[kovkay]

Can I ask what your mental illness is?

Schizoaffective

 

[WornOutLife]

When I was 17, my school forced me to do an internship in a real estate agency, it was then that I realized that I hated working and wanted to ctb because of it. I felt like a slave of the system.

I suffered a lot for years. I used to go to interviews, get the job but quit the following day. I did it like 10 times lol.

However, I was studying to become a teacher during those years and fortunately, one day, I got my degree and started teaching. It changed my life.

Working is not a reason to ctb anymore for me.

I really agree with those people who say that when you find what you love, you don't realize you're working.

Still, I know many people have to deal with so much that they can't quit their "normal jobs" and have no choice but to do hard physical labours or annoying office jobs.

Anyway, if you don't like your job or don't want to work at all, and want to ctb because of it, I hope you can find your passion. It doesn't matter if you're not "rich". Money will come sooner or later. I couldn't even pay my rent some years ago and now I can save some money!

 

[imsorrythatimhere]

One of my reasons. I'm genuinely just irresponsible and too lazy

 

[Squiddy]

Schizoaffective

I also have Schizoaffective along with a few other disorders