Does anyone else have NO life? And literally scrolls their phone or laptop all day to make up for lack of social fulfillment?

[jesse]

Yeah, I have no life. I work from home and rarely interact with anyone to do my job. I spend most of my free time watching streams. This is one of the few places I "talk" to anyone. When I try to escape my circumstances I always fail. Either because I run out of mental/physical resources very quickly or because I'm too scared, stupid, or incompetent. It's like I don't control my own mind sometimes. So... kinda just floating on, trying to distract myself from how much I hate myself, since experience shows I can't do seem to do anything about it. I am the definition of a loser, so it seems. I'll probably try to get a life again when I save up enough energy, and fail again shortly there after. What a life this one is. Could be worse I guess.

 

[Graytaichi]

Me too. I wake up 9am surf SS to evening ,take my dinner Surf SS then sleep. Wake up do this over and over again

 

[Cosmic dust]

I actually have a job, I have worked for the past 10 years, my coworkers are very nice and friendly, there is small talk, jokes, sometimes coffee breaks or even little parties, but people are there for work, its no place for socializing, most of the time we are focused on lonely tasks and everyone already has their own families and social circles, no one there is really interested in a proper relationship with me, in taking it out of the workplace, there is no sense of belonging there.

I live with relatives, but they are no better, I barely talk to them despite living in the same house. We have very different ages and interests, they are boring and very judgmental, I don't trust them at all to talk about my life.

I have like, 3 distant friends, that very rarely talk to me and when them do, its over phone messages, one invites me to hang out 2 or 3 times a year at best, another keeps talking about hanging out, but that never happens. I don't even remember when it was the last time I talked to them, sometimes we go weeks or months without talking.

My life is pretty much waking up, going to work and coming back to my home at night, to waste alone the little free time I have left and sleep. My free time is wasted mostly on tv shows, movies, books and browsing internet forums, like SS, to make up for the lack of social fulfillment.

I used to think that one day I would find the right people and things would change, now that just sounds naive.

 

[stellabelle]

Ha! I'm even more minimal than that. I've only VERY recently posted here.

And everything else is… NADA.

Sad.

Well.

Oh well.
Life.

What a waste of time.

 

[onlyanimalsaregood]

Yes, me.

 

[wanttogetonthebus]

Literally me.

 

[theloserestloser]

Yup that's my life. I get my social needs through Discord but it's obvious they only barely tolerate me there.

 

[whatevs]

Well but you need to take into consideration who you are as well. I have become aware that I am a very strange person that will find hard to have a sustained relationship no matter what and generally doesn't really like or respect other people.

Loneliness can be just part of who you are, unfortunately. The main thing is whether we can live with that or not, those that have been born this alienated.

 

[Cosmic dust]

Well but you need to take into consideration who you are as well. I have become aware that I am a very strange person that will find hard to have a sustained relationship no matter what and generally doesn't really like or respect other people.

Loneliness can be just part of who you are, unfortunately. The main thing is whether we can live with that or not, those that have been born this alienated.

One could argue that you became like this because of loneliness and other life experiences. I don't think anyone really borns alienated.

 

[whatevs]

One could argue that you became like this because of loneliness and other life experiences. I don't think anyone really borns alienated.

It was a dramatic expression, I meant that you are born fated by mental illness or what have you (conflicting traits) to become alienated. For me it started to really show at teenage years, so it's been a long while. I guess as a kid I wasn't alienated, but that's it. Been feeling outside and uncomfortable/against/contrarian/antisocial ever since.

 

[DeprivedofLife666]

I'm mainly on my electronics whenever im not sleeping or forced to do something, I hate leaving the house and my depression is so bad that I don't have the motivation to do anything productive.

This is me too. I'm 31 and my grandparents are literally keeping me from having a life. I hate being forced to "help" them because they don't need help, they are not old and crippled or disabled in any way, just like to boss me around and forces me to ride to the grocery store with them. Fucking sucks. I wish I could get my own place.

 

[Negrathecat]

I have one person I call my friend and a partner who supports me. My relationship with family is terrible, I rely on social media and without it I would just find myself starting at the walls.

 

[noaccount]

Here are some things I try to do in the internet hole:

- See if I feel okay taking a minute to ignore the screen and pay attention to what's going on with my body, but I often don't, due to living in a culture of exploitation that dehumanizes people. On the occasions I do find I'm ok to do so, stretch, check out acupressure points, maybe do some core exercises, maybe follow along with some tai chi videos.

- Try to shore up my communications with people I consider allies against dehumanization, including talking to people here on the basis of valuing bodily autonomy and the right to choice about life and death.

- Look up tutorials for simple songs, got an instrument to teach myself to play them.

- Go on "iNaturalist" and see what wildlife people have identified around me so I can maybe go check it out later.

 

[stellabelle]

Oh it's even worse when you're criticized for using your phone to read, express yourself, play songs, or communicate. So you switch to drawing with a pen and paper in isolation, until the rage boils and you reach the point of complete misery, have a complete fit of rage because you are so fuckin tired of "defending yourself" or "being accused" or "fucked with" or "stalked" or "spied on" or whatever.

Literally NO LIFE.

And even if I had a god damn mother fuckin job, it would be the same little "game" of bullshit because people are toxic and nothing ever gets better.

So I mean, communication device or not, nobody ever respected me or listened to me, they just snooped, ignored, picked pried and pretended to be stupid, used it to hurt me, continued the abuse, and then wondered why I grew to hate them, hate cellphones, hate social media, hate social interaction, the "professional world" and everything else.

I'll never have happiness, respect, autonomy, meaningful employment, privacy, or a good life, so who fuckin cares! Oh and if I'm not there to race to answer, oh well, just another reason to attack! $109/mo to do nothing, to stop reading, calling, communicating, photographing, with one sole exception and everything else.. HMPH! Ha. Point proven, people are selfish, the cellphone creates more problems than it solves, and nothing ever gets better anyway so, ha fucking ha, ta fucking da, tada!

 

[Josh007]

I like to think I'm the male verison of Umaru-san XD

 

[fuqed]

at 37 i have never had a life. ive always had very few friends in highschool. its hard to make an effort to be normal basically im just a sponge for negativity and i get into trouble and feel misunderstod. it would be nice to enjoy a hobby and to enjoy some activities. i've always wanted to go to community college and recently i was thinking about studying art but my drawings are poor because of having trouble learning. its not easy being around people feeling ashamed to have a severe mental illness and feeling envy for people that are better than me...i do wish i could just take a fuck it all pill and go to university somewhere where i can know myself

 

[The Eeyorish One]

I can relate. I've been unemployed for around 7 years. The only time I leave the house is to get groceries or go to any doctors appointment that can't be done online. I just sit and watch tv or play games most of the time. I never really know how to interact with people in person and I get really dysphoric since I'm trans and don't pass.

I play this online game and honestly seek social interaction from there. It's miserable how much I ended up being so dependent on this one online gaming acquaintance even though, in reality they probably won't think much of me...

I completely relate to this… I met someone from playing a game and I thought we were best friends. We talked all the time, had deep insightful convos, joked around, etc and then after a couple of years they just… blocked me on everything. Turns out they were purging their friends list and didn't feel close to me anymore (found out from someone else who was purged as I had talked to them once or twice). It was absolutely gutting as they were my only friend at the time and I thought maybe I had done something wrong. It sucks being reliant on online friendships, especially ones forged from games since you're often dropped once they stop playing the game.

 

[EndlessDream]

Hardly anything gives me joy or motivation

 

[frog_prince]

that's literally me.. my social skill is so bad because i'm a stutter and i can talk to people only when im intoxicated, but my friend told me that i might be an addict because i drank everyday, so i quit drinking and at the same time i found a company where i can work from home.. and here i am alone and depressed in my room for years.
several years ago, i met a beautiful girl and we liked each other but every single date we had was a disaster because i was incredibly nervous, and now she's happily married with kids
if you guys know rajesh koothrapali from the bigbang theory, he is the exaggerated version of me

lately i've been thinking maybe it's time for me to start drinking again to have social life and hopefully can distract my brain from thinking about ctb too much

 

[missingpeace]

I stopped working because I'm now mentally disabled, I can't listen to music or watch movies, I just do work around the house. Also just keep surfing the net for ctb info on reddit and here.

 

[WorthlessTrash]

Yes, me.

 

[Pentobarbital_Plz]

All day…weed and screens. Just tryna pass time…waiting for N… s i g h

 

[thx1138]

I have a job, but absolutely nothing going on outside of that. I keep trying to make friends or find volunteer places but it never works. I spend all my time alone and I'm so used to it because it's all I know/want.

 

[LossOfMe]

Exactly my situation. I'm a leeching NEET who spends their day watching videos/translating silly Hetalia comics/chatting with AI bots. I can't stand up anymore, so I'm just waiting for everything to crumble.