does anyone else feel weird having possessions?

[howcanigo]

having things feels just wrong. i wish i could get rid of all of my posessions tomorrow. everything feels so cluttered. even when its not. i think they're kind of proof that i'm here. all of the things kinda feel like a weight.

i wish i could get rid of all of my shit except for some clothes, my electronics and some hygiene stuff. i dont want the weight of owning things anymore. it'll all be stuff for my family to get rid of when im gone and for me to just have to idly look at while im here. i feel disgusting just looking at all of the shit i have. i don't even know what i'd do with all of it. and i wonder if i'd regret getting rid of everything. everything feels so busy but i can't get the motivation to clean everything and get rid of shit. and then i feel bad about even wanting to get rid of all of the things. it feels wasteful and like im not acknowledging the privilege of having shit and a place to put it.

 

[WAITING TO DIE]

having things feels just wrong. i wish i could get rid of all of my posessions tomorrow. everything feels so cluttered. even when its not. i think they're kind of proof that i'm here. all of the things kinda feel like a weight.

i wish i could get rid of all of my shit except for some clothes, my electronics and some hygiene stuff. i dont want the weight of owning things anymore. it'll all be stuff for my family to get rid of when im gone and for me to just have to idly look at while im here. i feel disgusting just looking at all of the shit i have. i don't even know what i'd do with all of it. and i wonder if i'd regret getting rid of everything. everything feels so busy but i can't get the motivation to clean everything and get rid of shit. and then i feel bad about even wanting to get rid of all of the things. it feels wasteful and like im not acknowledging the privilege of having shit and a place to put it.

Yes, I got rid of the vast majority of my possessions ages ago.
I now live a minimalist lifestyle and only own what is necessary ( except my tablet ).

 

[howcanigo]

Yes, I got rid of the vast majority of my possessions ages ago.
I now live a minimalist lifestyle and only own what is necessary ( except my tablet ).

how'd you go about doing that? were there any kind of 'steps' or did you just not have much to begin with?

 

[WAITING TO DIE]

how'd you go about doing that? were there any kind of 'steps' or did you just not have much to begin with?

I did it gradually, over a period of 6 months. I never had a lot of stuff to begin with, but I had things that I just never used.
I either gave them away to people who needed them, or took them to a charity shop.

 

[MyChoiceAlone]

i live in another country. had most of my stuff in storage but they kept raising the rent. one day, i said f it and lost everything with a keystroke. now and then, i think of the things i had and wonder what i did but i know i'd never see them again anyway. kinda miss my guns atm lol.

 

[cursedcure]

yeah, i'm getting rid of most of my shit, so that my loved ones don't have to deal with too much after i pass. owning too much is tiring, and i'm always messy, so the less i own the better to diminish clutter

 

[Jan1193]

I'm sorry for you have to feel like this. I feel exactly the same yo he honest. My mother past away in november last year, and I had yo endure with all the possessions, mine and her. The first months I had energy to organize, clean and all that I could, and then give yo family and near people from here and me. But that's feels like a fuckin shit right now because I still having a pandemonium in the house, and all now is dirty and abbandoned. Don't have energy for a lot of things. I feel so full of shame for having my mother house like this...

 

[howcanigo]

I'm sorry for you have to feel like this. I feel exactly the same yo he honest. My mother past away in november last year, and I had yo endure with all the possessions, mine and her. The first months I had energy to organize, clean and all that I could, and then give yo family and near people from here and me. But that's feels like a fuckin shit right now because I still having a pandemonium in the house, and all now is dirty and abbandoned. Don't have energy for a lot of things. I feel so full of shame for having my mother house like this...

i lived through a childhood with a mother who was a moderate hoarder (probably level 3/4 out of 5), whenever she wasn't drinking she was buying and sometimes she would do both to fill the void. we STILL have storage units filled with shit. so i know that pain well. i think thats where some of my problems with having things comes from, i constantly worry i will become her, as well as people having to deal with my shit. in actuality i just have a room and closet of stuff and its not even filled but it feels like a lot. i cant imagine being back in a house filled with stuff again. maybe you could look into getting storage units to make it more manageable?

 

[Jan1193]

i lived through a childhood with a mother who was a moderate hoarder (probably level 3/4 out of 5), whenever she wasn't drinking she was buying and sometimes she would do both to fill the void. we STILL have storage units filled with shit. so i know that pain well. i think thats where some of my problems with having things comes from, i constantly worry i will become her, as well as people having to deal with my shit. in actuality i just have a room and closet of stuff and its not even filled but it feels like a lot. i cant imagine being back in a house filled with stuff again. maybe you could look into getting storage units to make it more manageable?

I really, really apreciate your reply, it makes me feel better. Yesterday I was able to make the dishes, wash the toilet and some clothes too, that it feels a bit relief.

About the storage units, I don't know if you refers to simply boxes or maybe a... How do you name it? "Bodega" we say it, sorry. I'm from Mexico and yes, I have some plastic boxes. Maybe too many, full of things of her that I don't wanna touch it. Some of them I can desocupate it to fill with other things. In paper boxes too, haha, I hate when it sounds like a crybaby from me, it feels like a never ending issue. Desocupate units, fill it again, give all I can and then search again what more to get out of the house. Really feels with no end. Maybe if I just take care of the clothes and dust and maybe letting all the others things to the people alive when I'm gone...

 

[howcanigo]

I really, really apreciate your reply, it makes me feel better. Yesterday I was able to make the dishes, wash the toilet and some clothes too, that it feels a bit relief.

About the storage units, I don't know if you refers to simply boxes or maybe a... How do you name it? "Bodega" we say it, sorry. I'm from Mexico and yes, I have some plastic boxes. Maybe too many, full of things of her that I don't wanna touch it. Some of them I can desocupate it to fill with other things. In paper boxes too, haha, I hate when it sounds like a crybaby from me, it feels like a never ending issue. Desocupate units, fill it again, give all I can and then search again what more to get out of the house. Really feels with no end. Maybe if I just take care of the clothes and dust and maybe letting all the others things to the people alive when I'm gone...

yeah storage units in the US are big locked boxes you can rent out to store stuff you dont have space for, people use them when they move into smaller spaces like we did. the internet told me the translation to Spanish is "el almacén" which might not be right but.

i can relate to all of that, feels like its never ending. im so sorry its such a stressor in your life right now too and i hope you can get find the end of it soon.

 

[hardtruth]

My only valuable pocession which is priceless is a small bottle.

 

[Jan1193]

yeah storage units in the US are big locked boxes you can rent out to store stuff you dont have space for, people use them when they move into smaller spaces like we did. the internet told me the translation to Spanish is "el almacén" which might not be right but.

i can relate to all of that, feels like its never ending. im so sorry its such a stressor in your life right now too and i hope you can get find the end of it soon.

I supossed it. At least I can know, there's no services of storage in my contry because, between many reasons, people don't have or considerate waste money just for saving stuff that they can sabe un their homes. The most of people forgot what they really have in their personal storages, there's a rare and arcaic culture of hold all that they want or buyed some day because... We are third world. There's always hipotetic future needs that they can fix Will all that forgotten things. Even when those days never will come. The most of days I'm triying to forget it and not to blame to my mother for his hold habits; she was poor un her young and passed so many neccesities, not only in his childhood/young. But there's another days, like today that I just want to say that I hate her (even when I love and miss her with all my heart) just for letting me with a house that I can't name home wihout her, but with a lot of unnecesary things. I just want to dissapear because the angry, the shame and the grief of her gone and all her stuff, and my things. Aniway... Thank you so much for reading and answer me. How you can see, english is not my natal languaje, but I'll be glad to talk with you if you want it any day or any moment, not only about the holdering issues. I'm sure that you won't become a holder as you fear. You're not alone, friend.

 

[sensenmann]

Currently trying to get rid of most but I have too much stuff ..

 

[howcanigo]

I supossed it. At least I can know, there's no services of storage in my contry because, between many reasons, people don't have or considerate waste money just for saving stuff that they can sabe un their homes. The most of people forgot what they really have in their personal storages, there's a rare and arcaic culture of hold all that they want or buyed some day because... We are third world. There's always hipotetic future needs that they can fix Will all that forgotten things. Even when those days never will come. The most of days I'm triying to forget it and not to blame to my mother for his hold habits; she was poor un her young and passed so many neccesities, not only in his childhood/young. But there's another days, like today that I just want to say that I hate her (even when I love and miss her with all my heart) just for letting me with a house that I can't name home wihout her, but with a lot of unnecesary things. I just want to dissapear because the angry, the shame and the grief of her gone and all her stuff, and my things. Aniway... Thank you so much for reading and answer me. How you can see, english is not my natal languaje, but I'll be glad to talk with you if you want it any day or any moment, not only about the holdering issues. I'm sure that you won't become a holder as you fear. You're not alone, friend.

Makes sense, probably a big cultural difference. Here you can find them all over. They're really popular.
I get the resentment towards her even though you love her, i have the same problem with my mom. thank you for your messages! my direct message is open to you <3

 

[LonelyKitten]

I've actually done this. Got rid of most everything but the bare basics.
It felt cathartic, but now I do miss the stuff I had, and it makes me sad to know it'll never return.

I used to hoard really badly because "I might need x thing in this 1 in 10000 situation that'll totally come up", then I changed to purposely collecting stuff I like...
It's just so expensive.

I kind of want to have nothing and be free, but also recognize how important many tools can be, how much time or money can be lost by lacking them.
I guess it can go in any direction - if you feel secure enough that you'll have access to what you need (ideally with a secure income) it's a lot less scary to lose things.

 

[LaVieEnRose]

No, my demon and I get along quite nicely.

 

[howcanigo]

I've actually done this. Got rid of most everything but the bare basics.
It felt cathartic, but now I do miss the stuff I had, and it makes me sad to know it'll never return.

I used to hoard really badly because "I might need x thing in this 1 in 10000 situation that'll totally come up", then I changed to purposely collecting stuff I like...
It's just so expensive.

I kind of want to have nothing and be free, but also recognize how important many tools can be, how much time or money can be lost by lacking them.
I guess it can go in any direction - if you feel secure enough that you'll have access to what you need (ideally with a secure income) it's a lot less scary to lose things.

exactly that. i bounce between the feeling of i need to get rid of EVERYTHING and i need to keep EVERYTHING because it cost money and also maybe i'd need it! ive regretted donating certain items before, usually clothing, but rarely do i. im not quite sure what to do about it.

i think in the meantime i will just very rarely buy new things, and if i do it'll be things i need or very badly want lol.

 

[cryvinglightning]

i use retail therapy and shopping as a way to cope, because at least new stuff feels good. i'm making plans to decide who will get what when i ctb though.

 

[howcanigo]

i use retail therapy and shopping as a way to cope, because at least new stuff feels good. i'm making plans to decide who will get what when i ctb though.

i do that to a certain extent too!!! really just a way to distract myself, especially with vanity items like makeup and clothes and hair products. sometimes feels like i can buy myself into being a new person.
that's a good plan. maybe i'd organize it better before i go.

 

[cryvinglightning]

i do that to a certain extent too!!! really just a way to distract myself, especially with vanity items like makeup and clothes and hair products. sometimes feels like i can buy myself into being a new person.
that's a good plan. maybe i'd organize it better before i go.

every now and then there's this feeling of "reinventing" yourself. even if it doesn't last long, it's a rush.

 

[MelancholyDolly]

Yeah, I try not to think about it since I'm a collector. I have a lot of really expensive cute rare dolls, clothes, plushies etc. Ofc I could give it all away after I ctb but I hate everyone so no way in hell am I giving my precious belongings to any human ಠ⁠︵⁠ಠ I'd leave my everything to my cat but I don't want to die before him tbh. Maybe I should just ask to get buried with all of my stuff like a pharaoh or some shit lol but then what if grave robbers gets it!! Jeez this is why I hate thinking about this... (⁠´⁠;⁠︵⁠;⁠`⁠)

 

[howcanigo]

Yeah, I try not to think about it since I'm a collector. I have a lot of really expensive cute rare dolls, clothes, plushies etc. Ofc I could give it all away after I ctb but I hate everyone so no way in hell am I giving my precious belongings to any human ಠ⁠︵⁠ಠ I'd leave my everything to my cat but I don't want to die before him tbh. Maybe I should just ask to get buried with all of my stuff like a pharaoh or some shit lol but then what if grave robbers gets it!! Jeez this is why I hate thinking about this... (⁠´⁠;⁠︵⁠;⁠`⁠)

that is so super fucking cool! i would get the dolls enshrined LOL. always wanted to have a collection like the one you've described.

 

[MelancholyDolly]

Aww thanks XD Maybe I can hide them somewhere like Antarctica and leave a bunch of clues so it can be a huge treasure hunt. You should go for it! Collections are fun they start off slow but it's nice to own something you wanna show off lol

 

[achb]

I feel this, but somewhat differently? My friends are always telling me I need more stuff (my room is bare, gray, and undecorated). However, everytime I take a step back and look at things, I end up throwing more away.

It feels like I still have too much stuff despite the fact that I truly don't. I am this close to throwing out half of my wardrobe and giving away my dresser because I don't really need it. And I want to take down my bed frame. I already moved my mattress to the floor because it feels more right like that. It just always feels like too much and the emptiness just feels so much more comfortable. Which is sad because I very much enjoy the cozy cluttered kind of aesthetic.