Do you think your past bullies are still evil?

[noname223]

The people who bullied me. The most evil ones yes I could very well imagine that. I made the mistake to search for them on the internet. It hurts to see them flourish. But I cannot change it. I could imagine some were socio- or psychopaths. Maybe their families were evil and treated them badly which caused their evil behavior. The worst bullies came from affluent families. A friend of mine met one of them and he gained a lot of weight. Which is very ironic because he bullied me for being overweight. And I am very thin now.

There was a German Youtuber called "Juliensblog". He acted like the dumbest asshole on this planet. He made rap battles and bullied all the participants, insulted them and mocked them. He made fun of the holocaust, joked about people who committed suicide and showed gore on his channel. (I think).
I think he said he experienced abuse when he was younger. Suddenly, he completely disappeared he had 1 million subscribers. Due to his behavior he had issues with his job. Roundabout one year ago he gave his comeback. And well...he is now very obese (he made fun of people because of that a lot.) It seems like he has money issues and is really desperate. His bullying community is now bullying him.

I also experienced abuse and bullying and it influenced me badly. But I never was such an asshole as him. Many people say he deserved it. My theory is he had a psychosis. The medication often causes severe weight gain. Has he learned his lesson? I don't know. Many say his videos are trash and he is so pathetic to return in such a way.

I think the advantage of trying to be a good person is. It is easier to find people who want to be good either. And these are usually the better partners or friends.

There was a member from Argentina (he had his real face as profile picture and was stalked because he had a Youtube channel) who confronted his past bullies and told them which assholes they were. I would never have this courage. I think they might make fun of me still.

 

[Rational man]

The victims of bullying are not a fault. The bully is often dysfunctional, sociopathic and lacking empathy. Often, the bully is not fully aware of their destructive force but harbours deep seated, life- long pain which they attempt to deflect on others. I know this because my family abused me at many levels, both physical and emotional..I have witnessed their downfall, their inability to receive or give love in their loneliness and deluded world..All but one is dead and although I.will always carry the scars of their abuse, I experienced one thing that they never did,.that is love..Im sorry about your situation.

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

I had maybe like one bully in 3rd grade. I don't really think he was evil, just kind of snarky and dismissive of all my achievements. I had a romantic rival that a girl I liked preferred over me but I don't really care enough to find out what he's up to either. Other people have said bullyish remarks to me in the past but I've let those slide since they aren't wrong.

I think I am and have been the worst bully to myself but it's not like I ever do anything about it which means I'm still evil.

 

[lovelesslifeless]

yes.

 

[FireFox]

yes.

These bullying arseholes know 100% what they are doing. I am so sick and tired of society making excuses for these builles.

In this day and age it is well known bullying is one of the factors of youth suicide but people still do it because they don't care about other people's feelings.

Look at Donald Trump he has spent his life bullying his way through everything and ended up being president. That is how most bullies are.

Bullies are the police officers harassing the minorities and marginalised in their neighbourhoods, the arsehole boss, the narcissistic boyfriend or husband ( wives or girlfriend) or that authority figure that likes making life difficult for everyone.

 

[ijustwishtodie]

These bullying arseholes know 100% what they are doing. I am so sick and tired of society making excuses for these builles.

In this day and age it is well known bullying is one of the factors of youth suicide but people still do it because they don't care about other people's feelings.

Look at Donald Trump he has spent his life bullying his way through everything and ended up being president. That is how most bullies are.

Bullies are the police officers harassing the minorities and marginalised in their neighbourhoods, the arsehole boss, the narcissistic boyfriend or husband ( wives or girlfriend) or that authority figure that likes making life difficult for everyone.

Thank you so much for this comment. It's true and I really needed it. Some people bully others because it's simply how they are. Some people are massive psychopaths and gain satisfaction at exploiting others and making other people miserable. It's just how human beings are tbh. They prey on the weak to feel good about themselves. I hate humanity so much. I hate other humans. And I hate bullies too. I get so angry when thinking about bullies because they ruined my childhood and they've ruined other people's lives too.

 

[FireFox]

The victims of bullying are not a fault. The bully is often dysfunctional, sociopathic and lacking empathy. Often, the bully is not fully aware of their destructive force but harbours deep seated, life- long pain which they attempt to deflect on others. I know this because my family abused me at many levels, both physical and emotional..I have witnessed their downfall, their inability to receive or give love in their loneliness and deluded world..All but one is dead and although I.will always carry the scars of their abuse, I experienced one thing that they never did,.that is love..Im sorry about your situation.

@Rational man When I was builled at school I noticed my builles had awful parents who passed on their behaviour to their offspring . At school I was a victim of misogynistic harassment and bullying by this black boy who hated black girls.

This boy hated me for being a black girl and relentlessly terrorised me at school. He also terrorised other black girls in the school. His mother told him not to date a black girl because a "black girl might bully him"

His mother who is a black herself has a low opinion of black girls and women and she raised a misogynist piece of shit son.

I was so glad this arsehole got expelled.

I have plenty of examples of my builles having parents who are horrible human beings and passing on their behaviour on to their kids.

 

[pollux]

No. In fact we're in good terms now. Though I suppose the bullying never really got serious in my case (as I think I said before here). But overall pretty much all bullying in my school stopped at 9th grade or so

 

[FireFox]

Thank you so much for this comment. It's true and I really needed it. Some people bully others because it's simply how they are. Some people are massive psychopaths and gain satisfaction at exploiting others and making other people miserable. It's just how human beings are tbh. They prey on the weak to feel good about themselves. I hate humanity so much. I hate other humans. And I hate bullies too. I get so angry when thinking about bullies because they ruined my childhood and they've ruined other people's lives too.

@ijustwishtodie You deserved so much better , I hated secondary school because of the bullying I experienced. Older people look me as if I am crazy when I say I don't miss secondary school. I have more exciting and better times when I left school.

When people say "bullying is a part of life" I get mad because this is why bullying exists. Bullying will stop when these arseholes get punished to the max yes. I strongly believe people should be jailed if cause someone to kill themselves or attempt suicide because of bullying.

Jail these arseholes and they will learn to behave. Jail them young because this soft approach is not working anymore.

 

[EvisceratedJester]

These bullying arseholes know 100% what they are doing. I am so sick and tired of society making excuses for these builles.

In this day and age it is well known bullying is one of the factors of youth suicide but people still do it because they don't care about other people's feelings.

Look at Donald Trump he has spent his life bullying his way through everything and ended up being president. That is how most bullies are.

Bullies are the police officers harassing the minorities and marginalised in their neighbourhoods, the arsehole boss, the narcissistic boyfriend or husband ( wives or girlfriend) or that authority figure that likes making life difficult for everyone.

Most bullies don't realize that they are bullies, just like how most abusers don't realize or think of themselves abusers. People have a tendency to rationalize their actions and not take the time to reflect on them. Along with that, children in particular haven't developed the self-awareness to understand the full extent of their actions. They are usually still at the stage where they view morality from a simplistic perspective, seeing people as either good or bad and usually seeing themselves as good. Their actions of aggression and mistreatment towards their peers are usually reflections of them trying to fit into their school's social hierarchy, along with other potential issues that might be impacting them (abuse, poverty, family dysfunction, etc).

People in general rarely tend to acknowledge the actual bad things they have done to others and, in a lot of cases, only feel guilty over things that they know deep down inside aren't really their fault. We tend not to be as self-aware as we think we are. An abusive partner doesn't see themself as abusive, a police officer sees themself as the good guy, and a shitty boss sees themself as just someone just trying to do their job. We are taught that there are good guys and bad guys and everyone wants to think of themselves as a good guy. They want to be hero or the victim. The thing is, on a scale from the worse people to ever exist to Jesus, everyone leans closer to the worst people because even the worst people are complex and human.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that most people are evil and most people are also good. Even the worse people out there had good aspects to them and that's because people are complex. We are too complicated to be written off as either good or bad and this is an important thing to try and keep in mind.

Dehumanization is a disease. It works to divide us and leads to people being harmed. This type of mentality is what has led to prisoners being abused, people being discriminated against, and even genocide. Everyone views the people they don't like as being some sort of evil entity. Everyone likes to think that they are the little guy getting bullied and picked on by others and, rather than fighting against the systems in place that has lead to the problems we face today, we instead take that frustration and anger out on others whose ideals are just reflections of them growing up in the same world that we did. I'm not going to pretend as though I have never done this before and I'm not going to pretend as though I still don't catch myself doing this because even I'm guilty of it. I just find this type of view to be unproductive.

It makes me think of liberal girl-boss feminism. These people, rather than having discussions on the complexity of the patriarchy and how it impacts all of us, instead make the issue into this simplistic man vs woman ordeal. As a result, you get this whole "man = bad", "woman go girl boss = good", and "all women suffering equally", type of bullshit. In reality, the patriarchy also impacts men, women being masculine doesn't solve anything and even plays into patriarchal ideals, and not all women suffer equally under the patriarchy. Women of colour, disabled women, older women, and queer women have many unique struggles that conventially attractive young white women don't go through. Hell, some women even go out of their way to advocate for this particular system specifically because, due to how it intersects with other systematic issues, they have something to lose if it goes away. By simplifying the whole thing down to "man = bullies", you end up getting nowhere and you may even end up worsening things. It's easier to more accurately address systematic issues when you everyone as flawed and complex humans trying to get by in life, rather than viewing others as just evil bullies. This isn't Cool Cat Saves the Day.

Spoiler: In conclusion,

This was another episode of "EJ's rants about something while not having a single clue as to what point she is trying to get at". This entire post is basically just my own stream of consciousness that you have been tricked into reading, thinking that you would get something out of it, or not, as I say stupid shit all the time and you probably expected this to be on the same calibre of vague idiotic slosh like most of my other posts. I have no clue what I was even to get at with the last posts especially, lol. Either way, I wasted your time and you are never getting it back so I win.

 

[CatLvr]

Most bullies don't realize that they are bullies, just like how most abusers don't realize or think of themselves abusers. People have a tendency to rationalize their actions and not take the time to reflect on them. Along with that, children in particular haven't developed the self-awareness to understand the full extent of their actions. They are usually still at the stage where they view morality from a simplistic perspective, seeing people as either good or bad and usually seeing themselves as good. Their actions of aggression and mistreatment towards their peers are usually reflections of them trying to fit into their school's social hierarchy, along with other potential issues that might be impacting them (abuse, poverty, family dysfunction, etc).

People in general rarely tend to acknowledge the actual bad things they have done to others and, in a lot of cases, only feel guilty over things that they know deep down inside aren't really their fault. We tend not to be as self-aware as we think we are. An abusive partner doesn't see themself as abusive, a police officer sees themself as the good guy, and a shitty boss sees themself as just someone just trying to do their job. We are taught that there are good guys and bad guys and everyone wants to think of themselves as a good guy. They want to be hero or the victim. The thing is, on a scale from the worse people to ever exist to Jesus, everyone leans closer to the worst people because even the worst people are complex and human.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that most people are evil and most people are also good. Even the worse people out there had good aspects to them and that's because people are complex. We are too complicated to be written off as either good or bad and this is an important thing to try and keep in mind.

Dehumanization is a disease. It works to divide us and leads to people being harmed. This type of mentality is what has led to prisoners being abused, people being discriminated against, and even genocide. Everyone views the people they don't like as being some sort of evil entity. Everyone likes to think that they are the little guy getting bullied and picked on by others and, rather than fighting against the systems in place that has lead to the problems we face today, we instead take that frustration and anger out on others whose ideals are just reflections of them growing up in the same world that we did. I'm not going to pretend as though I have never done this before and I'm not going to pretend as though I still don't catch myself doing this because even I'm guilty of it. I just find this type of view to be unproductive.

It makes me think of liberal girl-boss feminism. These people, rather than having discussions on the complexity of the patriarchy and how it impacts all of us, instead make the issue into this simplistic man vs woman ordeal. As a result, you get this whole "man = bad", "woman go girl boss = good", and "all women suffering equally", type of bullshit. In reality, the patriarchy also impacts men, women being masculine doesn't solve anything and even plays into patriarchal ideals, and not all women suffer equally under the patriarchy. Women of colour, disabled women, older women, and queer women have many unique struggles that conventially attractive young white women don't go through. Hell, some women even go out of their way to advocate for this particular system specifically because, due to how it intersects with other systematic issues, they have something to lose if it goes away. By simplifying the whole thing down to "man = bullies", you end up getting nowhere and you may even end up worsening things. It's easier to more accurately address systematic issues when you everyone as flawed and complex humans trying to get by in life, rather than viewing others as just evil bullies. This isn't Cool Cat Saves the Day.

Spoiler: In conclusion,

This was another episode of "EJ's rants about something while not having a single clue as to what point she is trying to get at". This entire post is basically just my own stream of consciousness that you have been tricked into reading, thinking that you would get something out of it, or not, as I say stupid shit all the time and you probably expected this to be on the same calibre of vague idiotic slosh like most of my other posts. I have no clue what I was even to get at with the last posts especially, lol. Either way, I wasted your time and you are never getting it back so I win.
View attachment 148899

You, my dear, are a HOT MESS!

 

[eddy hendryx]

People who used to bully me back where I used to live in my home country were absolute scumbags, but I felt relieved when my grandma told me that most of them were dead or in jail.

 

[lamargue]

the term 'evil' is too constraining. a child rapist is considered evil by most, but acknowledging that fact allows us to justify the smaller evils committed by people each day. they aren't even present in the minds of those who commit them as being immoral in the first place, or containing any moral value at all

 

[Makoto]

The people who bullied me. The most evil ones yes I could very well imagine that. I made the mistake to search for them on the internet. It hurts to see them flourish. But I cannot change it. I could imagine some were socio- or psychopaths. Maybe their families were evil and treated them badly which caused their evil behavior. The worst bullies came from affluent families. A friend of mine met one of them and he gained a lot of weight. Which is very ironic because he bullied me for being overweight. And I am very thin now.

There was a German Youtuber called "Juliensblog". He acted like the dumbest asshole on this planet. He made rap battles and bullied all the participants, insulted them and mocked them. He made fun of the holocaust, joked about people who committed suicide and showed gore on his channel. (I think).
I think he said he experienced abuse when he was younger. Suddenly, he completely disappeared he had 1 million subscribers. Due to his behavior he had issues with his job. Roundabout one year ago he gave his comeback. And well...he is now very obese (he made fun of people because of that a lot.) It seems like he has money issues and is really desperate. His bullying community is now bullying him.

I also experienced abuse and bullying and it influenced me badly. But I never was such an asshole as him. Many people say he deserved it. My theory is he had a psychosis. The medication often causes severe weight gain. Has he learned his lesson? I don't know. Many say his videos are trash and he is so pathetic to return in such a way.

I think the advantage of trying to be a good person is. It is easier to find people who want to be good either. And these are usually the better partners or friends.

There was a member from Argentina (he had his real face as profile picture and was stalked because he had a Youtube channel) who confronted his past bullies and told them which assholes they were. I would never have this courage. I think they might make fun of me still.

Children don't know "right" or "wrong", they are just children. That's why we have to teach them to defend themselves. I received a lot of bullying in my childhood, a large part of my traumas come from there. But I don't blame the bullies (if they hadn't done it, others would have done it), it's my fault for never having defended myself (and here I'm talking about my personal case)...

something that surprised me when I was child was "group psychology" acting in real time. Many of my bullies were two completely different person when they were around people at school and when they were alone on the street.

the term 'evil' is too constraining. a child rapist is considered evil by most, but acknowledging that fact allows us to justify the smaller evils committed by people each day. they aren't even present in the minds of those who commit them as being immoral in the first place, or containing any moral value at all

and that is why morality, good and evil, are not subjective.

 

[WhatPowerIs]

Yes. It goes without saying.

 

[VeryShy]

I was never bullied much, except a bit in school, and I think those people are the same as they used to be.

 

[Rational man]

@Rational man When I was builled at school I noticed my builles had awful parents who passed on their behaviour to their offspring . At school I was a victim of misogynistic harassment and bullying by this black boy who hated black girls.

This boy hated me for being a black girl and relentlessly terrorised me at school. He also terrorised other black girls in the school. His mother told him not to date a black girl because a "black girl might bully him"

His mother who is a black herself has a low opinion of black girls and women and she raised a misogynist piece of shit son.

I was so glad this arsehole got expelled.

I have plenty of examples of my builles having parents who are horrible human beings and passing on their behaviour on to their kids.

Such an awful situation for which im sorry to hear. I can understand your comments regarding the parenting because the behaviour is shared in the family. Of course, it doesnt excuse the bullying nature but it does explain, maybe why dysfunctional behavioural patterns within the family are normalised, at least thats how I think. My family for example, were incapable of self- reflection, desperate to be loved and yet loved by no-one. I never really understood my parents silence on their upbringing but I since discovered that my grandfather cbt, my mother was abused by her father and by dad attempted suicide. None of this has anything to do with us for we are merely one of s series, inwhich the bully distorts their dysfunctional mind.

 

[sserafim]

Bullies are often successful because they're sociopaths and psychopaths, so they advance and win at life. It's another testament as to how this world is fucked up. Evil people win and get ahead

 

[ramon]

Here's a better one:

I got bullied at home, at school, at work, at relationships, you name it!

The worst part is not what they did to me. The worst part is that I became them!

So, I went about trying to make life miserable to whomever I could.

A few times I (unfortunately) got away with it and the rest I got what I deserved.

You can find out your bullies are doing great or terrible in life, yet it doesn't matter. You can look for those you hurt decades ago, apologize to them, be forgiven, and realize your victims will never change their attitude toward life because you scarred them for life (my experience with my victims).

You see, that poetic justice many of us look for will never be given to you in the systematic way a courtroom shows a victim how his/her perpetrator gets prosecuted. You never saw all of your perpetrators at home, at school, at work, or at a relationship falling in line to ask you to forgive them for that terrible thing they did to you a few minutes ago; and, most probably, you never will.

You can choose to forget about getting whatever overdue justice you're entitled to, get over it, and live whatever's left of your life the best way you can. In my case, I'd rather CTB because it becomes more unbearable by the year how any small thing in life can accidentally trigger vivid memories of the pain someone caused me or the guilt of something horrible I did to someone.

 

[mateusz432]

Yes, they are getting satisfaction while bullying, they are admired by people and they boost their ego. They have no reason to stop on their path.

 

[Plentiful_Despair]

No. In some ways I understand them now.

 

[escape_from_hell]

Some bullies that undergo hardship may self-reflect and develop a fuller range of compassion.
But nature highly rewards bullies, so it is rare.

There is also a massive genetic component that people want to deny, thinking we are all perfect little angels to be molded into even better angels from birth, and that only negative external influences can cause humans to be evil. This is complete bullshit. I strongly, strongly suspect the percentage of the population that are dark triads/bullies is increasing due to their prolific mating life and sex appeal.

 

[fatladysings]

Some posts above say that bullies don't know that they are bullies. I was bullied in my last job and I made secret recordings of them talking about me when I wasn't in the room. In one recording, one of the bullies described what to they were doing to me as "passive aggressive bullying" so they sure as hell knew what they were doing and they went ahead and did it anyway. I appreciate that not all bullies are the same as mine. But mine knew they were bullies.

 

[FireFox]

Some posts above say that bullies don't know that they are bullies. I was bullied in my last job and I made secret recordings of them talking about me when I wasn't in the room. In one recording, one of the bullies described what to they were doing to me as "passive aggressive bullying" so they sure as hell knew what they were doing and they went ahead and did it anyway. I appreciate that not all bullies are the same as mine. But mine knew they were bullies.

@fatladysings Workplace bullying is the worst I can relete your experience is exactly what I want through in my last job. I was nice to everyone at work, geniuenely cared for my work colleagues and did my best to help them with their work when assistance was needed but still my colleagues gossiped, ignored and excluded me at work. I was the youngest in the department me being 25 at the time and everyone else was older than me.

● When it Christmas at work I sent the whole department and my boss a Christmas e card and nobody said thank you this was just weeks in my job. I took time to write that card. I write meaningful messages in cards I send to people.

● An older woman who I thought was my friend at work in the office she surrounded herself around all these male colleagues in the department and excluded me from the group. Everyone knew where I was but she ignored me and so the did the other colleagues. That's when I knew everyone at work pretty much gossiping and complaining about me

● My colleagues who I saw everyday and worked on case enquiries never commented on how I was doing things and instead constantly went behind my back to our boss.

● my boss belittled me and made fun of my immaturity. His comments broke my confidence.

● When I upset an entilted A- hole customer my comments sent the department to a total meltdown. My colleagues pretty much gossiped about me and then I got reputation as newbie who upset the customer, the label never went away. I took responsibility for my mistakes but the management and Everyone else too at work gave me a hard time over it. Everyone else at work where scared of the customer's and took their BS whereas I didn't and wasn't scared to challenge their entitlement.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I wouldn't want to risk meeting them again to find out. Depends though really. Just how bad the bullying was. Were they doing it to copy others and try and fit in with a group? In which case, they may have matured. I'm ashamed to admit that I joined in with taking the piss out of people to try and remain in the group I was in at school. I feel bad about it now and I hope I'd never do it again.

I also feel like I've been in contact with a narcissist though. And, their (crazy) behaviour stemmed from that I presume. I'd never trust them to have changed substantially because- how they act is all wrapped up in who they are. Plus, they think they're in the right so- why would they even try to change? More than that, they see themselves as the persecuted victim. Some people in life, I think it's best to get as far away from as possible. I think it's way too risky to trust some people have changed. Not when they're capable of really awful things. I wouldn't be a very good parole officer!

 

[fatladysings]

@fatladysings Workplace bullying is the worst I can relete your experience is exactly what I want through in my last job. I was nice to everyone at work, geniuenely cared for my work colleagues and did my best to help them with their work when assistance was needed but still my colleagues gossiped, ignored and excluded me at work. I was the youngest in the department me being 25 at the time and everyone else was older than me.

● When it Christmas at work I sent the whole department and my boss a Christmas e card and nobody said thank you this was just weeks in my job. I took time to write that card. I write meaningful messages in cards I send to people.

● An older woman who I thought was my friend at work in the office she surrounded herself around all these male colleagues in the department and excluded me from the group. Everyone knew where I was but she ignored me and so the did the other colleagues. That's when I knew everyone at work pretty much gossiping and complaining about me

● My colleagues who I saw everyday and worked on case enquiries never commented on how I was doing things and instead constantly went behind my back to our boss.

● my boss belittled me and made fun of my immaturity. His comments broke my confidence.

● When I upset an entilted A- hole customer my comments sent the department to a total meltdown. My colleagues pretty much gossiped about me and then I got reputation as newbie who upset the customer, the label never went away. I took responsibility for my mistakes but the management and Everyone else too at work gave me a hard time over it. Everyone else at work where scared of the customer's and took their BS whereas I didn't and wasn't scared to challenge their entitlement.

You are right Firefox, workplace bullying is the worst (although I think school bullying can be severe too for some unfortunate kids).

If I had gone to the trouble of sending everyone in my department a heartfelt Christmas eCard and nobody had said thank you, I would have been devastated. It would have really impacted my Christmas. I love Christmas so much and it's supposed to be a time where people a little bit nicer to each other and nobody was nice to you at all. I'm sure it must have really put a dampener on your Christmas that year.

You say that there was an older woman who you felt was your friend but then it turned out she wasn't - it must have been awful. Its horrible when you think someone is your friend and then you find out the hard way that they aren't. It is a complete betrayal. And you couldn't even go to your boss for help because he was making fun of you. Horrible, horrible situation to be in.

You say that all this happened in your last job. Can I ask are things ok in your current job? I am aware that everything in your life can't be going well, otherwise you wouldnt be spending time in this forum, but I'm just hoping that you aren't having as bad a time in your current job as you were in your last job?

 

[sugarb]

I saw my third grade bully in highschool last year and he was pretty boring but didn't seem quite as cruel. Still definitely not a particularly kind or empathetic person but I think getting punched in the face somewhat corrected mr. playground terror's attitude long term

 

[slamjoetry]

I'm in a place right now where I can look back on all of the people who wronged me in my life, and forgive them for their actions. Or at least understand them as flawed humans. I'm the only person I know who I consider truly evil. And I'm not saying that to sound cool or edgy or whatever. I think I deserve to die.

 

[nir]

No. They had really bad home lives and were young with under-developed brains. Lashing out probably felt like normal, healthy behaviour to them.

However, I do still consider the actions they took against me to be bad. I just don't feel the same kind of animosity towards them anymore.