Discussion Do you think that people who oppose people attempting suicide have actually attempted it themselves in the past?

[Mistiie]

Every time I've ever talked to someone who says suicide is inherently a negative aspect of life, I've followed that up with the question of if they've ever felt so bad that they've felt suicide is the only option, and almost all the time, they've said "No."

The only time anything different happened was someone saying they contemplated it, sat on the edge of their balcony, and then got off and stopped considering it. That was the extent of it, and they'd not struggled since.

Has anyone actually had one of those seemingly unicorn-like experiences with people where they both don't want you to commit suicide and have actually been suicidal before? Because to me, it seems as though the only people who give a shit are the ones who don't know what it's like to struggle so much in life and don't understand how freeing the process is.

 

[tinyghost]

my husband has had a suicide attempt but is extremely staunchly against suicide and he thinks death is the worst thing that can happen to someone. his attempt totally renewed his will to live.

 

[Ligand]

There are tons of very vocal anti-suicide advocates that have made serious suicide attempts themselves. Conversely, there are plenty of people who have never even been depressed that seem to accept suicide as a reasonable decision under certain circumstances.

I honestly haven't noticed a very strong correlation either way. Formerly depressed people may be slightly more sympathetic on average, but even that is inconsistent.

 

[the_summoning]

Yes my coworker attempted before he moved back to the state. He used pills (no idea what kind) and survived and wound up getting his stomach pumped. He's the only person IRL who I've ever been open with about not only my depression and suicidal thoughts but that I was also researching methods. Of course he's staunchly against me committing suicide and said that he regretted it and never wanted to do it again.

 

[riamu]

i've always thought that people who are vocally anti-suicide are just afraid of death tbh. like they can't imagine themselves wanting to die so they force their viewpoint onto others

 

[Mistiie]

i've always thought that people who are vocally anti-suicide are just afraid of death tbh. like they can't imagine themselves wanting to die so they force their viewpoint onto others

This is exactly what I think this comes from. Either that or the idea that someone is just so flagrantly opposed to life, such that they would even abandon family members, pets, and everything around them to not feel anymore, is just such a foreign and alien concept that they can't do anything but oppose it, because it just doesn't make inherent sense.

 

[Weltall]

...4.8% of adults aged 18 and older in the United States had serious thoughts about suicide in 2021...

Stastically, just about 5% of the adult US population is affected by CTB thoughts--so about 1/20 people.
Realistically, that number is probably a bit larger due to the still-existing stigmas behind mental health problems.

There are tons of very vocal anti-suicide advocates that have made serious suicide attempts themselves. Conversely, there are plenty of people who have never even been depressed that seem to accept suicide as a reasonable decision under certain circumstances.

I honestly haven't noticed a very strong correlation either way. Formerly depressed people may be slightly more sympathetic on average, but even that is inconsistent.

Ligand kinda nailed the point I was going to make. There are people on both sides of the demographic that can have polar opinions despite their experiences or backgrounds.

i've always thought that people who are vocally anti-suicide are just afraid of death tbh. like they can't imagine themselves wanting to die so they force their viewpoint onto others

This is exactly what I think this comes from. Either that or the idea that someone is just so flagrantly opposed to life, such that they would even abandon family members, pets, and everything around them to not feel anymore, is just such a foreign and alien concept that they can't do anything but oppose it, because it just doesn't make inherent sense.

By biology response (SI), humans don't want to die. Were hardcoded by our genetics to not want to die:

• Involuntary breathing and autonomic bodily processes.
• Fight or flight response.
• The need to reproduce.
• Complex emotions to generate bonds with other humans (and living/non-living things).

So, in an unconscious way--yes, humans are afraid of death.
But humans are intelligent beings, and we don't have to think about: breathing, release of adrenaline to muscles, or our hormones affecting our emotions.

So the things that humans can easily correlate to is: appreciating all 5 senses, familial bond, being happy, and finding love.
For them, they feel that a person who wants to CTB is depriving their self of those experiences.

 

[Orange Cat]

There are people who have made past suicide attempts and later become anti suicide.
I don't think it is really that strange. Surviving a close brush with death for any reason ( not just suicide)can change someone. It can help them to see the bigger picture and their problems in perspective. It can also cause them not to take things for granted and appreciate life more - especially the small things.

Also depending on their method, they may have a permanent injury as a result of the attempt and regret it. They may be trying to warn other people not to glamorize suicide because a failed attempt can have serious consequences.

 

[Spiritual survivor]

I've attempted before but some healing took place and it's calmed down but I still think about unaliving myself sometimes. The reason I think about it is just not wanting to deal with having to work and pay bills. If I was wealthy I doubt I would want to exit. I'm just not wanting to deal with my older years impoverished and alone trying to survive. I'm not really pro life or pro death. It depends on the individual circumstances.

 

[Scythe]

Plenty of idiots out there who has been there and still opposes suicide under any circumstance. Believing it got better for them, so everyone else can recover too. Plenty of people who are suicidal that still call up the authorities on you if you attempt. At least from what I've heard. What a group of morons. There are ppl who doesn't oppose it though, pretty sure the founders of SS believed in body autonomy. Some health care professionals too, hence why there's euthanasia.

 

[tiredcat]

i used to be one of those people. what was going through my head was "i don't want people to suffer the way i was." which is kinda selfish?? idk.

the feeling is horrible. but i've learned for some it's peaceful. finally being able to let go. plus, most of the people i opposed it from were people i knew very well and had deep connections to. though we see goodbye threads on here everyone is anonymous, there may be some sort of connection but for most not as deep as it could be for, let's say, someone who's been married to this person for 5 years.

people are selfish so ofc they'd want the love of their life to stay with them. they'll try and find every single resource they can. goes for mothers and fathers too (although too many parents had their children without seriously thinking about what it comes with and are pretty shitty lol)

and people here could say "well i would let them because if they're suffering that bad i want them to be in peace." which is valid, but honestly sometimes those sentiments can be interrupted wrong, especially if the suicidal person in question is pro life themselves. they would probably want someone to tell them they want them to stay, like someone cares.

i understand both points of view. and honestly im not one to criticize either, but now i know there are cases where it's only fair to let someone go. especially when it comes to chronic illness and disability. not to say i everyone one of those people couldnt live happily in some way though.

i respect everyones decision to ctb here because i want to trust that they've done their best, gave life their best shot.

all opinion tho, still respect everyones choices (:

 

[Jinxyxx]

I myself have been very suicidal my whole life but i am still strongly against suicide. Im starting to change my views because im realising some people actually dont have a nother choice. Or they tried everything and it just doesnt work. So yeah, i know how hypocritical it sounds. My opinion is that suicide is wrong and extremely selfish but i am planning to do it myself.

 

[AnonymousL]

Every time I've ever talked to someone who says suicide is inherently a negative aspect of life, I've followed that up with the question of if they've ever felt so bad that they've felt suicide is the only option, and almost all the time, they've said "No."

The only time anything different happened was someone saying they contemplated it, sat on the edge of their balcony, and then got off and stopped considering it. That was the extent of it, and they'd not struggled since.

Has anyone actually had one of those seemingly unicorn-like experiences with people where they both don't want you to commit suicide and have actually been suicidal before? Because to me, it seems as though the only people who give a shit are the ones who don't know what it's like to struggle so much in life and don't understand how freeing the process is.

You hear it a lot in the media.. people who say "it really gets better" after they attempted.

Well I might be only 24 but after 24 years of suffering I don't even want it to get better anymore. I don't want to grow old and live a happy life if that is possible.

 

[!!!!!julpet]

When you reach the tail end of life, looking back, it can seem quite short, relative to how long you thought it appeared to you to be when you were at the beginning of your life.

That said, and by comparison to some I'm still a youngster, 70 years is long enough to experience both pro and anti feelings. Merlot, beer, and 100 paracetamol. Obviously it didn't work since I'm still here writing. Before that, I had no patience or understanding for those who would deliberately kill themselves. But when the desire hit me, it opened up a completely different set of thoughts. Where once I could only understand one perspective, I could, as if instantly, understand and be sympathetic to a whole lot more.

There is no simple wrong or right here. Or, if there is, it is beyond our understanding. If there's an answer, we may get to know it when we are dead.

Or, since as far as I've seen in 70 years, there is ZERO evidence to point to ANYTHING conscious when a person is dead, I tend to believe, albeit without proof, that we'll never know; and that in the grand scheme of things, it doesn't matter too much.

But speculation is part of life. I think so I am, an all that jazz. It (thinking) passes the time, and takes your mind off other things less pleasant.