Do you pity those who after work just watch tv until bed every day?

[Ambivalent1]

What kind of shit life is that? Better to reign in hell than watch modern tv.

 

[lostforever77]

So honestly if I could find like happiness in it that would be pretty cool. And honestly I think I could if I had someone to watch it with, because then its not just watching a show but its also companionship. Honestly anything is better than how I am feeling right now.

 

[Ambivalent1]

So honestly if I could find like happiness in it that would be pretty cool. And honestly I think I could if I had someone to watch it with, because then its not just watching a show but its also companionship. Honestly anything is better than how I am feeling right now.

I don't understand you pfp. Explain it to me please

 

[4am]

that's just my life but without work

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

No because even when I didn't have work all I did mostly was watch shows or YouTube videos.

 

[Pluto]

 

[xinino]

Tbh, I missed those days, I hate technology I rather live like my grand grand grandparents. my biggest achieve of my life would be the day I get rid of the router and every things that work with electricity.

 

[escape_from_hell]

It's a shit life on paper.
I gave that stuff up and went traveling and filled my days with engaging activities, thinking it was superior (maybe an ego thing).
In some ways it was better to be active, but mostly for health reasons.

However, I now envy the ability to even do so. Anhedonia has taken away that possibility for me. To be able to enjoy that stuff is a bonus.
I won't scoff at someone able to get something out of vegging out in front of a TV. All activities I partake in are unfulfilling and the reward aspect is highly dulled. So it makes no sense for me to be an entertainment elitist.
After all, my life is pretty much vegging out in front of SaSu and it takes a lot out of me to even be able to do that. I force myself to go to the gym thinking it will have some kind of benefit but with anhedonia I'm not so sure, honestly--maybe slight reduction in overall pain/misery.

For me to shit on people having a kickass time watching TV is like a starving person calling people enjoying a five-star meal gross pigs.

I agree in principle. Just also I can't judge cuz their life is way better than mine in terms of well-being.

 

[Ambivalent1]

It's a shit life on paper.
I gave that stuff up and went traveling and filled my days with engaging activities, thinking it was superior (maybe an ego thing).
In some ways it was better to be active, but mostly for health reasons.

However, I now envy the ability to even do so. Anhedonia has taken away that possibility for me. To be able to enjoy that stuff is a bonus.
I won't scoff at someone able to get something out of vegging out in front of a TV. All activities I partake in are unfulfilling and the reward aspect is highly dulled. So it makes no sense for me to be an entertainment elitist.
After all, my life is pretty much vegging out in front of SaSu and it takes a lot out of me to even be able to do that. I force myself to go to the gym thinking it will have some kind of benefit but with anhedonia I'm not so sure, honestly--maybe slight reduction in overall pain/misery.

For me to shit on people having a kickass time watching TV is like a starving person calling people enjoying a five-star meal gross pigs.

I agree in principle. Just also I can't judge cuz their life is way better than mine in terms of well-being.

It's good to know that going outside and doing activities sucks when you have anhedonia. Might as well lay in my bed with my phone til death takes me.

 

[sserafim]

I pity those who have to work. What kind of shit life is having to work? Better to reign in hell than work. Work is modern day slavery. Being a NEET is the way to go. It's NEET or rope for me

 

[escape_from_hell]

It's good to know that going outside and doing activities sucks when you have anhedonia. Might as well lay in my bed with my phone til death takes me.

I still do it out of pure discipline. Going on two years now. Delusional cope that things will get better.
After how much time should one just call it quits is the cruel personal decision.

But yeah, there are worse things than enjoying mindless TV. Like looking at 'beautiful nature' and feeling fuck-all.

 

[Ambivalent1]

I pity those who have to work. What kind of shit life is having to work? Better to reign in hell than work. Work is modern day slavery. Being a NEET is the way to go. It's NEET or rope for me

I'm a neet and it's hell. There is no heaven for anyone.

I still do it out of pure discipline. Going on two years now. Delusional cope that things will get better.
After how much time should one just call it quits is the cruel personal decision.

But yeah, there are worse things than enjoying mindless TV. Like looking at 'beautiful nature' and feeling fuck-all.

I wanted to start going to museums, but I know I'll either feel self conscious or blah.

 

[escape_from_hell]

I'm a neet and it's hell. There is no heaven for anyone.

I wanted to start going to museums, but I know I'll either feel self conscious or blah.

I'd say give it a go still.

Especially if you have not done that stuff yet. Like if you have not gone to many museums or done a lot of hiking and stuff, you may still get something out of it.
Novelty is a powerful thing, so just seeing something fresh can kickstart things.

Just careful not to overdo it?
May have fucked myself by too much YOLO and making the most of the moment carpe diem stuff in youth. Ironically. Too much gratitude and trying to milk every situation. Now every hike is the same. All waterfalls are just dripping water at different scales. Every museum is just a bunch of shit on display big whoop, etc.
Like a drug addict gets tolerance after too much cocaine or something maybe I fucked my brain up with too much travel, too much hiking, too many beautiful paintings?

My brain has generalized all these things, and am too socially distant to reconnect with this stuff. It all got way worse when I fucked up my loving long term relationship two years ago, probably not a coincidence.

So if you are able to cultivate meaningful relationships, I think that will help a lot. Many people vegging out in front of TV feel comfortable in those homes with family. Many people enjoy hikes and visits to the museum with their loved ones etc. Because it's not always just about the thing but the social bonding is a big enhancer. Being introverted caused me to think I ALWAYS preferred eating alone, visiting museums alone, that kind of thing. I just needed the time to myself therapeutically, but getting too far away from humanity has been equally devastating.

 

[sserafim]

I'm a neet and it's hell. There is no heaven for anyone.

I wanted to start going to museums, but I know I'll either feel self conscious or blah.

I'm a neet and it's heaven. I don't have to talk to or interact with other people. I can just be alone in peace. I hate socializing. The only job I would ever tolerate is a remote one, like a WFH programmer or something. I hate social interaction and being around people. I hate how there's an expectation to

I'd say give it a go still.

Especially if you have not done that stuff yet. Like if you have not gone to many museums or done a lot of hiking and stuff, you may still get something out of it.
Novelty is a powerful thing, so just seeing something fresh can kickstart things.

Just careful not to overdo it?
May have fucked myself by too much YOLO and making the most of the moment carpe diem stuff in youth. Ironically. Too much gratitude and trying to milk every situation. Now every hike is the same. All waterfalls are just dripping water at different scales. Every museum is just a bunch of shit on display big whoop, etc.
Like a drug addict gets tolerance after too much cocaine or something maybe I fucked my brain up with too much travel, too much hiking, too many beautiful paintings?

My brain has generalized all these things, and am too socially distant to reconnect with this stuff. It all got way worse when I fucked up my loving long term relationship two years ago, probably not a coincidence.

So if you are able to cultivate meaningful relationships, I think that will help a lot. Many people vegging out in front of TV feel comfortable in those homes with family. Many people enjoy hikes and visits to the museum with their loved ones etc. Because it's not always just about the thing but the social bonding is a big enhancer. Being introverted caused me to think I ALWAYS preferred eating alone, visiting museums alone, that kind of thing. I just needed the time to myself therapeutically, but getting too far away from humanity has been equally devastating.

Why do people want relationships? Maybe I'm schizoid but I could not care less about relationships and connection. Why do they want social bonding? I want to get as far away from humanity as possible

 

[Ambivalent1]

I'm a neet and it's heaven. I don't have to talk to or interact with other people. I can just be alone in peace. I hate socializing. The only job I would ever tolerate is a remote one, like a WFH programmer or something. I hate social interaction and being around people. I hate how there's an expectation to

Why do people want relationships? Maybe I'm schizoid but I could not care less about relationships and connection. Why do they want social bonding? I want to get as far away from humanity as possible

You need to realize that you are a deviation from the norm. Your brain is unlike that of others. You're supposed to want to be around people at least half the time. Introverts aren't shut-ins. They do socialize but about half as much as extroverts do. Trauma is an example of something that causes extreme introversion due to distrust and fear of more trauma.

 

[EmptyHeaded]

You're supposed to want to be around people at least half the time. Introverts aren't shut-ins. They do socialize but about half as much as extroverts do.

To be fair, that entirely depends on the person. There's no "guideline" for it, no "you're supposed to". It's usually personal preference, but can of course be caused by something else.

 

[AmericanMary]

Before finding this form all I did was go to work, come home, and cuddle up watching TV in bed with my cat.

 

[escape_from_hell]

I'm a neet and it's heaven. I don't have to talk to or interact with other people. I can just be alone in peace. I hate socializing. The only job I would ever tolerate is a remote one, like a WFH programmer or something. I hate social interaction and being around people. I hate how there's an expectation to

Why do people want relationships? Maybe I'm schizoid but I could not care less about relationships and connection. Why do they want social bonding? I want to get as far away from humanity as possible

Did you post that you have Asperger syndrome in other threads? Not 100% sure so please forgive me if that not correct.
I do not have that particular diagnosis, but am an extreme introvert. However I think your condition can affect your specific social needs.

So I can only speak to the circumstances of how I as an introvert came to be in social bonds and have felt pain from their deprivation, despite seeking to avoid it most of the time.
The first driver was that I was not in a position to become a neet leaving high school, which was a long time ago. I also was still under the illusion that life may have good things to offer. At times it was okay, however, it was not worth the effort put forth. Well, I ended up joining the military thinking it would straighten me out, pay for college, all that shit. As a shy person it's not a good choice really. Was forced to be in many social situations, engage in a lot of interpersonal politics type shit to not get fucked over...at least by my own standards, trying to remain under the radar as much as possible but there are definitely limits in that environment.
So you develop a big phony friend circle that dissolves quickly (band of brothers my ass, unless you are a worthy social being maybe unlike me). Then the college thing and career. Again, neeting was not as luxury I had.

I am not totally asexual and was dealing with a lot of social stresses daily (work) so pursuing relationships was a way to find a partner where social interactions would have some kind of positive attribute other than being a soulless labor machine at the office and imbibing a lot of alcohol and listening coworker 'buddies' have perplexing orgasms over sportsball at bars.

Relationships tended to last longer for me I think because I am not big on constant bickering and dramatic fights. However, I therefore had a series of partners that treated me like absolute dogshit. I eventually came upon a relationship with a person where things clicked. That lasted a long time. Over that time, bonding becomes something to which one is accustomed. They became a family member to me. But owing to past abuses and my continual need for alone time anyway, I took it for granted and tried to stay aloof and figured I could go without and still enjoy the things in life the same. I moved to another country thinking it was for the best and suffered extreme consequences mentally.

So bonds can sneak up on you. If you are truly feeling pretty good, maybe it's best to avoid forming real relationships. That would have worked for me I think. Once I lost someone that became a genuine family force in my life, especially because of my obliviousness, it has been far more painful than just not having it from the start even though I specifically thought I was avoiding attachment.

Consider whether you truly have absolutely ZERO social needs. I am extremely, extremely introverted to the point that up until my join date, I hardly typed anything on the internet. Instead it was a voyeuristic kind of internet usage. Never been one to post to forums and shit much despite using the internet for decades.

So what little social needs I had, my long-term partner was there in life. It was not happening online where I would never share anything (look at how words are weaponized against people for things they say online as an example, a permanent source of ammo to condemn one with). Then going for years where the ONLY social interactions you have that are not reading other people's thoughts on a screen are bums begging you for money and employees telling you how much to pay at stores with artificial smiles, and generally hostile or zero acknowledgement otherwise, the only thoughts are one's own. Sounds like heaven and peace. In practice, mind and body were deteriorating even more. Painful emotions. I don't want to be social. But I am human. I don't want to eat food either, but these needs are foisted on me.

Consider that you DO have some kind of social aspect to your life. It maybe takes on a different character than others. For example, my introversion typically reaches into my online life as well. I post here from pain and desperation. Even still, you are averaging >30 posts/day based on your join date, and I am averaging about 3 posts/day since mine (and that three takes a lot out of me).
That's not good or bad, it's just a different style of socializing. I am also old and battered by life now, and had a caring partner before, so words on the screen don't do it for me as much anymore. It also leads to me making these long ass posts to try and explain myself because I feel like it is easy for others to misunderstand me and I suck ass with words from lack of using them.

Although you say you do not care at all about social connections and bonding, you are doing it online to some extent. It's not the same as attending weddings and chatting with BFFs at school or attending the game or whatever people do these days, but it is some form of communication.
It is entirely possible you could go without as well. You can try and use the internet in 'read-only' mode for a year or so to see how you feel. However, even though you've expressed conflict with your parents, even as a neet they are still a social presence in your life, so it's hard to understand the full tamale of absolute solitude--which may sound heavenly, but the mind has a way of punishing in this shitty life. Unfortunately, we don't know if we have social needs till we don't even have the choice anymore.

 

[Unicr0n]

To be fair, that entirely depends on the person. There's no "guideline" for it, no "you're supposed to". It's usually personal preference, but can of course be caused by something else.

There's a reason people call things 'normal'. Why scientists generalize. Because the majority of people follow a certain pattern of behavior. Yes, there is "supposed to". Humans are supposed to crave social interaction, because we are a social species, and for millions of years being social is what allowed the species to survive to this point in life. Being social improves mental health. Solitary confinement in prison shows a huge reduction in mental health afterwards. Humans are supposed to be social. It doesn't mean all are. Those that don't are a minority, an exception to how humans are. It doesn't make them wrong for doing so. The fact that people are on here, talking to others online despite claiming they're antisocial, don't need social interaction, etc, proves that. This is just as much social interaction as driving [which is also another social interaction with other people]. Just because it's not talking directly to their face doesn't mean that it's not talking. You're still craving that socialization just in another format.

 

[EmptyHeaded]

There's a reason people call things 'normal'. Why scientists generalize. Because the majority of people follow a certain pattern of behavior. Yes, there is "supposed to". Humans are supposed to crave social interaction, because we are a social species, and for millions of years being social is what allowed the species to survive to this point in life. Being social improves mental health. Solitary confinement in prison shows a huge reduction in mental health afterwards. Humans are supposed to be social. It doesn't mean all are. Those that don't are a minority, an exception to how humans are. It doesn't make them wrong for doing so.

If you say "supposed to", it implies that something is wrong with those that aren't that way. Nothing is wrong with people who don't want social interaction; it's personal preference. Being social only improves mental health if you like being social.

 

[greebo6]

That was me every time I had a job (which wasn't for long as it always went wrong) . It almost as soul destroying as not working and watching T.V all day. Either way its empty ,unbalanced and its not really living .Its just existing.

 

[Ambivalent1]

To be fair, that entirely depends on the person. There's no "guideline" for it, no "you're supposed to". It's usually personal preference, but can of course be caused by something else.

Her surprise that people want to be social is also not typical. It shouldn't be surprising that we are social creatures and have made it this far due to social bonding. She is bonded to her family. Otherwise she'd be homeless. The family unit is the first bond we make and it's the most important.

If you say "supposed to", it implies that something is wrong with those that aren't that way. Nothing is wrong with people who don't want social interaction; it's personal preference. Being social only improves mental health if you like being social.

There is something wrong with us. I'm a shut-in due to trauma. She's averse to being social due to autism. We deviate from the norm by not being like the majority.

 

[thenamingofcats]

This was me at one point and my quality of life was better then it is now. I don't pity them. Sometimes it's the best a person can do at the time.

 

[EmptyHeaded]

Her surprise that people want to be social is also not typical. It shouldn't be surprising that we are social creatures and have made it this far due to social bonding. She is bonded to her family. Otherwise she'd be homeless. The family unit is the first bond we make and it's the most important.

That's a different thing. Lack of understanding for social dynamics could be explained by her Asperger's.

There is something wrong with us. I'm a shut-in due to trauma. She's averse to being social due to autism. We deviate from the norm by not being like the majority.

Not to be rude, but that's just you. I avoid people and social interactions because I prefer it that way, nothing else.
Deviation from the norm isn't anything bad. You already deviate from the norm if you have a niche interest or hobby.

 

[Ambivalent1]

That's a different thing. Lack of understanding for social dynamics could be explained by her Asperger's.

Not to be rude, but that's just you. I'm a shut-in because I like it, nothing else.
Deviation from the norm isn't anything bad. You already deviate from the norm if you have a niche interest or hobby.

First point, I agree.

Do you have schizoid personality disorder?

Deviation from the norm is bad sometimes though.

 

[Unicr0n]

If you say "supposed to", it implies that something is wrong with those that aren't that way. Nothing is wrong with people who don't want social interaction; it's personal preference. Being social only improves mental health if you like being social.

Not really, no. We're supposed to have fun when we play games. Is it wrong when we don't always have fun? No. It's a natural part of life. It's not abnormal to not always have fun playing games even though we're supposed to have fun. That's the point of games.

And you're wrong about the social only improves mental health thing. Sorry, but that's wrong from a neurological standpoint.

 

[EmptyHeaded]

First point, I agree.

Do you have schizoid personality disorder?

Deviation from the norm is bad sometimes though.

No, I don't. I just don't like interacting with people (or going outside in the first place).

I should have clarified. I don't mean that it can't be bad for the person that's "different", but rather that it's not bad from a scientific point of view. People are bullied and put down sometimes for the smallest difference in personality.

 

[Ambivalent1]

No, I don't. I just don't like interacting with people (or going outside in the first place).

I should have clarified. I don't mean that it can't be bad for the person that's "different", but rather that it's not bad from a scientific point of view. People are bullied and put down sometimes for the smallest difference in personality.

Were you bullied growing up? Is that why you don't like interacting with people except online? If so, then your aversion to people also isn't normal. Bullying is trauma.

 

[EmptyHeaded]

Not really, no. We're supposed to have fun when we play games. Is it wrong when we don't always have fun? No. It's a natural part of life. It's not abnormal to not always have fun playing games even though we're supposed to have fun. That's the point of games.

No, you're not supposed to have fun. "Supposed to" means that you should, not could. If you're supposed to go to work, you aren't asked to go to work. You're ordered to go to work.
You can have fun playing games; you don't have to have fun and nobody tells you to have fun.

And you're wrong about the social only improves mental health thing. Sorry, but that's wrong from a neurological standpoint.

I don't mean to be rude, but that's a ridiculous statement.
You're saying that someone who despises social interactions improves their health with them.
There is not a single study out there that determined that social interactions have a positive health effect on those who are averse to said interactions.

 

[sserafim]

Did you post that you have Asperger syndrome in other threads? Not 100% sure so please forgive me if that not correct.
I do not have that particular diagnosis, but am an extreme introvert. However I think your condition can affect your specific social needs.

So I can only speak to the circumstances of how I as an introvert came to be in social bonds and have felt pain from their deprivation, despite seeking to avoid it most of the time.
The first driver was that I was not in a position to become a neet leaving high school, which was a long time ago. I also was still under the illusion that life may have good things to offer. At times it was okay, however, it was not worth the effort put forth. Well, I ended up joining the military thinking it would straighten me out, pay for college, all that shit. As a shy person it's not a good choice really. Was forced to be in many social situations, engage in a lot of interpersonal politics type shit to not get fucked over...at least by my own standards, trying to remain under the radar as much as possible but there are definitely limits in that environment.
So you develop a big phony friend circle that dissolves quickly (band of brothers my ass, unless you are a worthy social being maybe unlike me). Then the college thing and career. Again, neeting was not as luxury I had.

I am not totally asexual and was dealing with a lot of social stresses daily (work) so pursuing relationships was a way to find a partner where social interactions would have some kind of positive attribute other than being a soulless labor machine at the office and imbibing a lot of alcohol and listening coworker 'buddies' have perplexing orgasms over sportsball at bars.

Relationships tended to last longer for me I think because I am not big on constant bickering and dramatic fights. However, I therefore had a series of partners that treated me like absolute dogshit. I eventually came upon a relationship with a person where things clicked. That lasted a long time. Over that time, bonding becomes something to which one is accustomed. They became a family member to me. But owing to past abuses and my continual need for alone time anyway, I took it for granted and tried to stay aloof and figured I could go without and still enjoy the things in life the same. I moved to another country thinking it was for the best and suffered extreme consequences mentally.

So bonds can sneak up on you. If you are truly feeling pretty good, maybe it's best to avoid forming real relationships. That would have worked for me I think. Once I lost someone that became a genuine family force in my life, especially because of my obliviousness, it has been far more painful than just not having it from the start even though I specifically thought I was avoiding attachment.

Consider whether you truly have absolutely ZERO social needs. I am extremely, extremely introverted to the point that up until my join date, I hardly typed anything on the internet. Instead it was a voyeuristic kind of internet usage. Never been one to post to forums and shit much despite using the internet for decades.

So what little social needs I had, my long-term partner was there in life. It was not happening online where I would never share anything (look at how words are weaponized against people for things they say online as an example, a permanent source of ammo to condemn one with). Then going for years where the ONLY social interactions you have that are not reading other people's thoughts on a screen are bums begging you for money and employees telling you how much to pay at stores with artificial smiles, and generally hostile or zero acknowledgement otherwise, the only thoughts are one's own. Sounds like heaven and peace. In practice, mind and body were deteriorating even more. Painful emotions. I don't want to be social. But I am human. I don't want to eat food either, but these needs are foisted on me.

Consider that you DO have some kind of social aspect to your life. It maybe takes on a different character than others. For example, my introversion typically reaches into my online life as well. I post here from pain and desperation. Even still, you are averaging >30 posts/day based on your join date, and I am averaging about 3 posts/day since mine (and that three takes a lot out of me).
That's not good or bad, it's just a different style of socializing. I am also old and battered by life now, and had a caring partner before, so words on the screen don't do it for me as much anymore. It also leads to me making these long ass posts to try and explain myself because I feel like it is easy for others to misunderstand me and I suck ass with words from lack of using them.

Although you say you do not care at all about social connections and bonding, you are doing it online to some extent. It's not the same as attending weddings and chatting with BFFs at school or attending the game or whatever people do these days, but it is some form of communication.
It is entirely possible you could go without as well. You can try and use the internet in 'read-only' mode for a year or so to see how you feel. However, even though you've expressed conflict with your parents, even as a neet they are still a social presence in your life, so it's hard to understand the full tamale of absolute solitude--which may sound heavenly, but the mind has a way of punishing in this shitty life. Unfortunately, we don't know if we have social needs till we don't even have the choice anymore.

Yeah I have Asperger's aka autism level 1, ADHD and social anxiety. I'm probably schizoid as well