Do you need a reason to CTB?

[sometimesoon]

I wish I had a reason to CTB, but all I know is that I feel it's the right thing for me to do. I could give you some reasoning, but in the end its just a feeling. It's a feeling ever since I was a teenager that I would some day cancel my life

 

[Edpal247]

I wish I had a reason to CTB, but all I know is that I feel it's the right thing for me to do. I could give you some reasoning, but in the end its just a feeling. It's a feeling ever since I was a teenager that I would some day cancel my life

I think it should be more than just a "feels". Sorry it has haunted you so long. For 63 years I would have SWORE I would never do it unless I was in a burning building or such. Things are different now. Now I really need to escape this mess I am in. And a few progressive medical issues that are driving me bat-sh** crazy.

 

[lostintheloop]

I think that only you can no whether your reason is 'enough' for your own ctb. Even if you feel you don't have a reason, that feeling you're having is still one. But I do think there is no harm in trying to unpack it. Obviously idk your situation but in most cases there is something underlying that urge. I think it's good to explore and understand that before you act on any feelings. Just a suggestion, you know what's best for you and i wish you well

 

[sometimesoon]

I think it should be more than just a "feels". Sorry it has haunted you so long. For 63 years I would have SWORE I would never do it unless I was in a burning building or such. Things are different now. Now I really need to escape this mess I am in. And a few progressive medical issues that are driving me bat-sh** crazy.

I agree it shouls be more than just feels. But I think I was trying to say it is so hard to describe why I will CTB that it comes down to a feeling. But I do think people have the right to completely control their life and when to cancel it. They don't need to explain it if they don't want to

I think that only you can no whether your reason is 'enough' for your own ctb. Even if you feel you don't have a reason, that feeling you're having is still one. But I do think there is no harm in trying to unpack it. Obviously idk your situation but in most cases there is something underlying that urge. I think it's good to explore and understand that before you act on any feelings. Just a suggestion, you know what's best for you and i wish you well

I agree unpacking it has some benefits - but sometimes you just get tired of life - and want to cancel it. Nothing is sometimes just better than something

 

[randal_bond]

Isn't the reason is you want to die? For me it seems like reason enough.
If not, here's another one.
You don't enjoy life - that's a very good reason. I knew somebody who just couldn't experience joy. They even traveled the world to discover what ticks them. But they still had this dysforia. Nothing was sweet for them, they enjoyed nothing. I don't know where this person is now and whether they went through with CTB.

 

[sometimesoon]

Isn't the reason is you want to die? For me it seems like reason enough.
If not, here's another one.
You don't enjoy life - that's a very good reason. I knew somebody who just couldn't experience joy. They even traveled the world to discover what ticks them. But they still had this dysforia. Nothing was sweet for them, they enjoyed nothing. I don't know where this person is now and whether they went through with CTB.

It's less about wanting to die, but wanting to be dead - to non-exist.

I did a serious attempt recently with a partial suspension. I would have died, if the anchor had not given way.

But I remember just before I passed out I just told myself "let it happen" and I had this real sense of satisfaction as I was heading to death, and a sense of disappointment when I came too.

 

[randal_bond]

It's less about wanting to die, but wanting to be dead - to non-exist.

I did a serious attempt recently with a partial suspension. I would have died, if the anchor had not given way.

But I remember just before I passed out I just told myself "let it happen" and I had this real sense of satisfaction as I was heading to death, and a sense of disappointment when I came too.

Well, let's say you had a practice. Now you're aware of what can go wrong and how you should do it better.

 

[sometimesoon]

Well, let's say you had a practice. Now you're aware of what can go wrong and how you should do it better.

it puts in my head that there is no more testing - I have a method and it is lethal -