B
Beachedwhale
Mage
- Mar 3, 2021
- 526
Does anyone else have broken dreams?
I had dreams in my last year of school but due to various personal reasons didn't obtain them... Then buried them deep down when I went off to uni. Just buried the whole past. Confidence meanwhile continued to plummet and now, a decade later, having unearthed the memories of that time and my childhood, my dreams have caught up to me, only I have failed to obtain them and am materially in a much much shittier position than back then.
And it wasnt even that difficult to obtain, but due to my extreme social phobia and depression and ignorance I did what I've always done, just avoided life and its sweet fruits even when they were ripe and hanging low begging for me to pick them.
I could still kind of salvage small bits of them, but it's a bit uncertain, it'll take much more effort and energy now than then as my issues have gotten worse, and I'll have spent my whole 20s unhappy, and I cannot live with my parents anymore but can't move out. I just can't be bothered anymore.
I had dreams in my last year of school but due to various personal reasons didn't obtain them... Then buried them deep down when I went off to uni. Just buried the whole past. Confidence meanwhile continued to plummet and now, a decade later, having unearthed the memories of that time and my childhood, my dreams have caught up to me, only I have failed to obtain them and am materially in a much much shittier position than back then.
And it wasnt even that difficult to obtain, but due to my extreme social phobia and depression and ignorance I did what I've always done, just avoided life and its sweet fruits even when they were ripe and hanging low begging for me to pick them.
I could still kind of salvage small bits of them, but it's a bit uncertain, it'll take much more effort and energy now than then as my issues have gotten worse, and I'll have spent my whole 20s unhappy, and I cannot live with my parents anymore but can't move out. I just can't be bothered anymore.
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