My dream is for this dreadful, torturous existence to be erased so it's like I never suffered at all, all I want is to cease existing, I just want all to be gone and forgotten for me in the peace of non-existence with no more pain and no more suffering and for me non-existence is just all that's positive in this existence I always saw as a mistake.
I'd never wish for the abomination of existence rather all I want is some peace, I find it the most terrible, dreadful tragedy how this existence was imposed causing all this harm and suffering as a result and I'll always prefer to not exist no matter what than suffer.