Do you hate yourself?

[eternalmelancholy]

Self hatred can come in many forms. The most common being self sabotage because you don't feel worthy. I don't think I could live with the shame and guilt of my past even if all my other problems were some how magically fixed.

Somewhere along the line you cross a point of no return. Once you cross this point there is no hope for a normal happy life. You cannot undo what happened to you. You can't unknow what you know.

 

[motyxia]

Yes. I wish I could create a clone of myself just so I can beat the shit out of him. Normal hurting yourself isn't enough, I want to hurt myself from the perspective of someone else to really get my anger out. I imagine that'd be the most therapeutic thing.

 

[FuneralCry]

No, not really. I do hate this life and being myself. However my hate is not directed towards me, but existence in general. All my problems are caused by the fact that I was born in the first place. I hate how I was forced to live. I hate the society that takes away the peaceful methods and denies us a right to die. I know I deserve better than this life. I deserve true peace which can only be found in death.

 

[eternalmelancholy]

No, not really. I do hate this life and being myself. However my hate is not directed towards me, but existence in general. All my problems are caused by the fact that I was born in the first place. I hate how I was forced to live. I hate the society that takes away the peaceful methods and denies us a right to die. I know I deserve better than this life. I deserve true peace which can only be found in death.

I don't think there is anything wrong with recognizing that you were dealt a shitty hand. What is so wrong with folding? None of us chose to be born. Life was imposed on us. I don't need empty platitudes or condescending judgements. I just want death. Nothing can change my mind.

My inability all these years to ctb has only added to my suffering. It kills me knowing I am partly responsible for being in this mess. The other part being my parents for cursing me with existence in the first place.

 

[narval]

Yes.
/10chars

 

[Futile]

Not really, my problems stem more from the outside. Surely I'm not perfect by any chance, but I do not think I hold any big responsibility for how my life has gone

 

[kurisutinabestgirl]

Yes very much so. It's hard to really explain it all and my reasons, but my ctb not only would be my escape from this shitty world, but also a way to get rid of myself.

 

[Angst Filled Fuck Up]

Sure do. Hate what I've become, especially. But I do acknowledge it's not really my fault. Or at least not entirely.

 

[eternalmelancholy]

Sure do. Hate what I've become, especially. But I do acknowledge it's not really my fault. Or at least not entirely.

Every passing day I can't ctb is another day filled with misery and torment. It is a painful realization that you are doing this to yourself. The original reasons why you want to ctb doesn't even matter after a certain point. The fact that you can't do it means adding more misery ontop of it.

Maybe that's the price to pay for an early exit. All the future pain and fear you get to avoid has to be paid upfront when you ctb.

 

[Anathema]

I do. There's so much I would change if I could go back.

 

[WrongPlaceWrongTime]

If the laws of time allowed it, I would go back and strangle myself with my umbilical cord to undo all the burdens I would bring.

 

[sadbadpsychogirl]

no

 

[eternalmelancholy]

If the laws of time allowed it, I would go back and strangle myself with my umbilical cord to undo all the burdens I would bring.

If you went back in time to kill yourself in the womb, you would have never made it into adulthood to travel back in time. Hence you will still be born without interference. The universe is too crafty to trick with our feeble minds.

 

[Scribble Fan]

Yes, a lot of the time I wish I was somebody else. I know none of this is my fault but that doesn't change who I am. I'm still broken as ever.

 

[LonelyBrazilian]

Yes, I hate myself for having a shitty mental health, a shitty personality and a shitty ugly face.

 

[wanttodie]

Yes, I hate myself and living that's way I want to die

 

[TriggerHappy]

Self hate like self harm is Intense :: it's confusing... I kinda like myself (personality etc) to a degree but dislike my character borne from addictive manipulation.
♡ I used to have 2do this recovery affirmation thing :: look in the mirror and say :: "if I loved myself enough I'd.... " man, was that difficult! ♧
My consequences are shared, I'm tired of dissapointing, hurting and burdening those that love me. I don't see a happy magical recovery, I'm too far gone. All my life i was told i was less-than /defective... I gues i believed em... I often wish I could erase my existence, it would improve everything for everyone.

 

[Idontmatter]

I hate myself every day. It's hard for me to even look in the mirror.

 

[Enigmatic Sailor]

I don't hate myself. I hate parts of myself that are very negative.

 

[it's_all_a_game]

I don't hate myself, even though I freely admit I'm not the best person in the world & the things people say to me imply I should despise myself. I mostly hate our society and the awful animals called "humans".

 

[deflationary]

Not in most moods. I usually direct my hatred outward.

 

[Snake of Eden]

Yes i hate myself with passion. I used to get baffled why ex partners and friends will turn against me in the past. It is not until recently that I was able to see how toxic and negative I am. The worst part is I could never change no matter how much i try just like I cant change my autism or my severe skin disease. I even tried becoming religious and be strict about it and pray for be a better person but I became worse as a religious person. My hate now is directed towards God as he allowed me to exist in first place.

 

[WhisperingCave]

I lot of the time I feel like I hate myself for having depression. But, when everything is said and done, I know most of my problems situational and I don't think I hate myself.

 

[DeathBecomesMe_2021]

I hate myself every day. It's hard for me to even look in the mirror.

Same here.

 

[Thaneem]

Honestly, I don't think I do. I hate the choices I've made that have brought me to where I am and I hate my physical weaknesses, but I rather like my essential nature.
For me, its more just knowing that the best days are behind me and any future I might have will only turn the already shitty present worse.

 

[ascetic_]

I hate myself because of what I become when I'm angry.

 

[motel rooms]

No. In fact, I'm making love to myself at this very moment.

 

[MeltedJello]

Yes, I have a lot of self hatred. Somedays, I love some of things that I do, however, I don't think I can ever love myself at all. I see myself as a mistake who never should've been born, and a weak person who can't live in this world.

 

[rationaltake]

I sort of do.

 

[avoid_slow_death]

More than anyone else.