Do you guys have a goodbye list you want to make before you die and go to the infinite nothingness?

[Braindead Atheist]

Heres my list

My friends:
Adri, morgan, Gracie, Joe, Noelle, ericka, Edan, Joe, Aj, Edan, michelle, maddy, Haleigh, Meg B, Meg. G, Derrell and, hannah. (not all of these are close friends, I have about 6 close friends)
My family and extended(well techinically I live with them so theres that)
My neighbors
My past teachers
Mrs.Brun, Mrs.Allen, Mrs.Henry, Mrs.Kinkade, Mrs.Bustillo, Mrs.Peacock, Mrs.Dziadosz, mrs.Lillis, Mrs.Burvee, Mrs.D, Mrs.Allstaut, Mrs.Petelin, Mrs.Tan, Mrs.Pearson, Mrs. Dougherty, Mrs.Oliver, and Mrs.Morgan
My mentor, Miss Amie,
Mrs.P, Miss susan, and Miss Carole, my therapist
Family friends like my aunt's best friend Mrs.Kemp and my mom's friends the knutsons. I know thats a lot of people to let down but you've red my story, you know how bad things are...I'm fat no matter what and pcos makes me feel shity, I'm retarded and life in my past has been awful, so why would my future be any better? Being retarded means you can't learn right. I will need more help than allowed and may not even succeed then. I accept that death is a void, iwish there was a heaven but theres not. its just too illogical.
my good bye list is long but i know i owe people that much.
-Thankyou

 

[Jumping_realms]

Rest easy, friend.

 

[Zvov]

I just made a list while driving home from work tonight. I don't think I could ever actually try to say goodbye to all of them without breaking down. I hope you are able to give all the goodbyes you want and have a peaceful journey.

 

[Apricity]

Said goodbye to my wife on Snapchat last night because I was going to attempt partial. Passed out drunk before I could attempt and woke with a message from her: "goodbye??" I was able to cover and say i meant goodnight because i was drunk. Everclear 190 is my new best friend.

 

[phoenixx]

Yes. I have already have a couple of suicide letters written out for when the day eventually comes. I have letters written out for my family, because I wanted to explain the way I felt and make sure they knew it wasn't there fault and of course, to say how much I loved them and to say goodbye. I also decided to write one to a teacher, who I haven't seen for almost 10 years (since I dropped out of high school). Back then, I was struggling really bad with my mental health and he came into my life and did all he could to help me. From taking me to hospital when I overdosed, to taking my to therapy when my mental health was especially bad. If I was doing bad during lessons, he would allow me to sit in his office to calm down. He'd let me talk, give me advice and just try his best to help me. I never got to thank him for everything he did, so I wanted to make sure I did. He went above and beyond for me, he was truly amazing. So even though in the letter I am saying goodbye, I'm also thanking him because without him, I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have made it past 15 years old (I'm almost 25 now).

 

[Braindead Atheist]

Yes. I have already have a couple of suicide letters written out for when the day eventually comes. I have letters written out for my family, because I wanted to explain the way I felt and make sure they knew it wasn't there fault and of course, to say how much I loved them and to say goodbye. I also decided to write one to a teacher, who I haven't seen for almost 10 years (since I dropped out of high school). Back then, I was struggling really bad with my mental health and he came into my life and did all he could to help me. From taking me to hospital when I overdosed, to taking my to therapy when my mental health was especially bad. If I was doing bad during lessons, he would allow me to sit in his office to calm down. He'd let me talk, give me advice and just try his best to help me. I never got to thank him for everything he did, so I wanted to make sure I did. He went above and beyond for me, he was truly amazing. So even though in the letter I am saying goodbye, I'm also thanking him because without him, I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have made it past 15 years old (I'm almost 25 now).

Good teachers are some of the kindest people. I really miss all of those that I listed.. Some of them are on facebook and we're friends but not everyone. I just wish I could get to see them one last time. and tell them that its nothing personal. life has just always been too much for me and I am sorry but I have to go. I will miss them until I can't any more.

 

[Alwaysbadtime]

You sound fairly young and have a lot of friends and people who care about you and you care about them. I would perhaps wait until you had less before thinking to do it. I don't know your story but I think if you have friends you are still a functional person with shit to offer.

 

[Amumu]

I have literally zero friend so it'd be completely weird for me. I wouldn't do a list, nor a note. People can go fuck themselves.

 

[Braindead Atheist]

I just made a list while driving home from work tonight. I don't think I could ever actually try to say goodbye to all of them without breaking down. I hope you are able to give all the goodbyes you want and have a peaceful journey.

i hope so too. I tried asking people to lunch but some of the most important(mrs.brun and mrs.allen0 don't want to because of covid. I want to save goodbye without actually saying it. you know, so i don't get "saved". I hope no one tries to convert me to religion because i don't want to get my hopes up and then disappointed when i start slipping into nothingness.

 

[stankboy421]

I just need to hug my parents. They both live in different cities to me so its a bit of a mission. I'll write my best friend a letter when I ctb, she lives on the other side of the world. That's all <3

 

[FuneralCry]

For me personally, I do not know many people and there is not many people I am close with. All the friends I used to have I am no longer in contact with. I plan to just write notes to family members saying now I am at peace and there is nothing you could have done and things like that. I couldn't ever actually say goodbye to anyone.

 

[Braindead Atheist]

You sound fairly young and have a lot of friends and people who care about you and you care about them. I would perhaps wait until you had less before thinking to do it. I don't know your story but I think if you have friends you are still a functional person with shit to offer.

Well I have no future ahead of me because I'm retarded. I was thinking of waiting it out until i actually get to that point but we'll see.

For me personally, I do not know many people and there is not many people I am close with. All the friends I used to have I am no longer in contact with. I plan to just write notes to family members saying now I am at peace and there is nothing you could have done and things like that. I couldn't ever actually say goodbye to anyone.

I am just going to catch up with them over lunch as a goodbye. They'll have no idea.

 

[phoenixx]

Good teachers are some of the kindest people. I really miss all of those that I listed.. Some of them are on facebook and we're friends but not everyone. I just wish I could get to see them one last time. and tell them that its nothing personal. life has just always been too much for me and I am sorry but I have to go. I will miss them until I can't any more.

I agree with you. I wish I could do the same with the teacher I mentioned. I haven't seen him in almost ten years, I'd do anything to speak to him one last time and thank him in person. Maybe I'll get the chance before my times comes. And maybe you will too.

 

[Braindead Atheist]

I agree with you. I wish I could do the same with the teacher I mentioned. I haven't seen him in almost ten years, I'd do anything to speak to him one last time and thank him in person. Maybe I'll get the chance before my times comes. And maybe you will too.

I saw my past principal (mrs.Morgan) from the school i got academic help at and she waved at me. She was directing traffic so I couldn't say anything. I don't think I could have said anything without crying and then of course she would find out and i'd get saved and I don't think i want that. The two hours a day that I spent at her school with my second favorite teacher(my first favorite is mrs.brun), Mrs.Allen was the best part of my childhood. They went out of their way to help me and when I had a hard time mrs.Allen would say, "don't beat yourself up" or "don't be so hard on yourself" and would remind me that I've come a long way. Or if I was really upset or crying or something she called mrs.Morgan and she would take a walk with me and talk things over to calm me down. I had to miss my afternoon recess to go to their school and it really bothered me. I also dealt with dream anxiety disorder most nights and it got to be too much one day. Mrs.Morgan asked me how I was and I cried and told her about everything and how I needed recess and she said, "There are somethings in life that we can't control. I agree with you,it is unfair. Lets see what we can do about that." and the next day, ms Allen said, "Guess what? I have a suprise for you! Ms.Gill(which was mrs.Morgans old name) said you can go outside and play for 20 minutes, but just this once." Mrs.Allen and I became super close my last year at her school. She said, "Isabelle, I think it was by fait that I met you, promise me no matter how old you grow that we will always stay in touch?" and i asked, "what about after 6th grade and you're not my teacher anymore?" and she said, "Isabelle, I think you and I will always find a way." and now we're friends on social media. i just wish i could say goodbye to them in person, but with out indicating that i'm going to kill myself. I think I would cry too much though and then they'd know. I just can't have that happen. i already thanked them with artwork but i will say good bye to them and mrs.brun if its the last thing i do.

 

[Jumping_realms]

No.

 

[Braindead Atheist]

I saw my past principal (mrs.Morgan) from the school i got academic help at and she waved at me. She was directing traffic so I couldn't say anything. I don't think I could have said anything without crying and then of course she would find out and i'd get saved and I don't think i want that. The two hours a day that I spent at her school with my second favorite teacher(my first favorite is mrs.brun), Mrs.Allen was the best part of my childhood. They went out of their way to help me and when I had a hard time mrs.Allen would say, "don't beat yourself up" or "don't be so hard on yourself" and would remind me that I've come a long way. Or if I was really upset or crying or something she called mrs.Morgan and she would take a walk with me and talk things over to calm me down. I had to miss my afternoon recess to go to their school and it really bothered me. I also dealt with dream anxiety disorder most nights and it got to be too much one day. Mrs.Morgan asked me how I was and I cried and told her about everything and how I needed recess and she said, "There are somethings in life that we can't control. I agree with you,it is unfair. Lets see what we can do about that." and the next day, ms Allen said, "Guess what? I have a suprise for you! Ms.Gill(which was mrs.Morgans old name) said you can go outside and play for 20 minutes, but just this once." Mrs.Allen and I became super close my last year at her school. She said, "Isabelle, I think it was by fait that I met you, promise me no matter how old you grow that we will always stay in touch?" and i asked, "what about after 6th grade and you're not my teacher anymore?" and she said, "Isabelle, I think you and I will always find a way." and now we're friends on social media. i just wish i could say goodbye to them in person, but with out indicating that i'm going to kill myself. I think I would cry too much though and then they'd know. I just can't have that happen. i already thanked them with artwork but i will say good bye to them and mrs.brun if its the last thing i do.

okay, here's an update: mrs.Brun and Ms.Allen are too afraid of covid to go to lunch, so now I'm going to see if Mrs.Morgan will go. I'm emailing her first thing tomorrow. Tbh, I doubt she'll reply because she never did in the past. Also, she doesn't have an associate principal to help her with any of the work, so she's extra busy. I don't even know if I should bother. I bet you like 50 bucks she never responds. ***Huff*** I guess if people don't want to say good-bye to me then, they won't see me before I die. And theres no life after death, so they'll never see me again for the rest of eternity. Or maybe thats what they want? What does everyone think?

 

[Braindead Atheist]

Ok guys, so heres my update on saying my goodbeyes, i said goodbye to Mrs.Kinkade and Mrs.Petelin. Mrs.Dziadosz and mrs.Lillis never responded to my request to go to lunch , but i can ask again. Mrs.Brun and Ms.Allen are too afraid to go to lunch because of covid. I'm asking Mrs.Morgan to lunch via email in a few minutes, I bet like a million bucks she doessn't even reply or give lunch a second thought. I doubt she even cares enough to go even without covid. What do you guys think? Should I even bother trying? Should I just give up on the list all together? I'll let you know what happens. It will be one more reason to kill myself if people don't even want to say goodbye.