Leiot

Leiot

Coming back as a cat
Oct 2, 2024
309
I don't hate them as much as feel sorry for them. Most of them are just freaking clueless.
 
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Dr Iron Arc

Dr Iron Arc

Into the Unknown
Feb 10, 2020
21,012
I said I resent THE FACT they want me to fit in. Tbh I don't really care about them I just wish I didn't take part in any of that and that's one of the reasons I need to go
That's fair. Sorry about that.
 
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oneeyed

Specialist
Oct 11, 2022
330
I'm very reclusive and dislike most people. It's mentally exhausting talking to people. Co-workers ask what my weekend plans are and it's always the same, stay in and work on personal projects. They always seem to have something planned to do something, they probably think I'm a serial killer lol. Sucks in the romantic department as well. Oh well. Too bad my ctb attempts in the past failed, I wouldn't have to work about this.
 
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Surai

Surai

Student
Mar 26, 2024
128
If not most of my interaction with my familly will leave me in a more hatred state. I try to stay away as much as I can
 
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L

lnlybnny

Arcanist
Jan 25, 2024
498
If not most of my interaction with my familly will leave me in a more hatred state. I try to stay away as much as I can
Same. I isolate as much as possible, I get frustrated when I'm obligated to interact with relatives. They truly steal the little bit of energy I have, I can feel myself getting even worse when I'm around them
 
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BeijaFlor

BeijaFlor

Dreamer
Oct 17, 2024
35
I feel like I hate every person around me. And it's not easy having to live around them.

I hate their ideas. I hate their meaningless small talk, gossip about trivialities, their stupid ambitions, I hate the fact that they think they need a purpose. I hate their houses, cars, doctors, trips, restaurants, the stupid ways they find to numb themselves. I hate the fact that they only think you have value based on what you can provide them with. What is purpose anyway? I don't have one, not in the way they accept it. I'm incapable of fitting in, and that's neither beautiful nor romantic, because I don't like the person they project onto me, the simplistic version they see when they look at me. I hate it so much.

hate is a strong feeling... i've felt it several times through life but, honestly, nowadays...

it sorta grew into apathy, i feel

when you seriously begin to consider CTB for real, planning etc, theres a chance you might stop giving as much of a fuck about people, society etc

all thats been on my mind lately is, how am i spending my last days? coz my date is due in acouple months from now so...

do i have the time, patience or care to even bother?

i get the feeling... its just, im trying to have the most meaningful/enjoyable time that i can for now, but again, perspective changes when your mind is set

i feel this SO much. wouldn't say i'm a true misanthrope, but my baseline for any stranger is always pure hate and distrust, until they "prove" to me they're kind/"worth keeping around", which is usually like 1 out of every 1000 for me.
i've trying to trying to rewrite my brain to stop be so absurdist, and at least let it be nihilistic, so i'm not so crushingly lonely all the time, but it's hard. therapy sucks. dysphoria/dysmorphia/mental illness makes it all nearly impossible, but it does make me feel better momentarily when someone does let me in, though it's only a matter of how long until i scare them away, and it's back to square one. you're defs not alone.

also used to be like that, n everytime i let someone new into my life, n either scarem the hell away or burn bridges, i tell myself for fucks sake, it the last time

i do enjoy my time alone, wont deny. live by myself, spending my remaining time at home.

but, sometimes i still feel like interacting, i guess, at least with like-minded individuals such as in here.

they say im bipolar n borderline, w ADHD n cronic depression

therapy sucks for me, simply bcoz they cant fix the root of the problem, which isnt me, its this fucking world.

therapists are just there to leech off your money, play their role in the pharma industry, n try to squeeze you out of every dime for as long as they can

but yeah... letting people in

i mean, i used to avoid that in the past but, since im set on my goals, who cares?

if we're ever gona find anybody to share any true thoughts n feeings about any of this, its probly here
 
ElVato

ElVato

Life is absurd.
Nov 9, 2024
27
I've come to dislike humanity as a whole. I truly believe people are bad. I wouldn't go as far as to use the word evil, because I don't think psychopaths are all that common, but I do wholeheartedly believe that people are inherently selfish and conflictive.

As much as I dislike Jung and behaviorists, I do like his concept of a collective consciousness/unconsciousness that perpetuates creation. I love to see people creating: artists, musicians, writers, etc. But artists can be extreme assholes, no matter what their works might suggest. I'm truly surprised when I meet a nice person, and even then, it takes me a good while to be convinced they are not just putting up an act (let alone trusting them). It's also kinda related to how a person can be very professional and efficient at their job but be a complete piece of shit as a person.

For a long time, I couldn't compromise over this. I refused to believe that people were just shit, I really wanted to believe that "rotten apples" were just so shit that they muddied the waters. And this made me suffer for free. Maybe, because I was so young, I believed deep down that I could make a change, or maybe it was just the eternal illusion of "if I'm good, people will be good with me". In any case, I freed myself of that pointless torture by just accepting that's just how humans are.

And I'm not even talking about the whole "in situations of power everyone becomes corrupt" and the plethora of experiments that "prove" human evilness. I'm just saying that it's in our nature to be selfish, despite being social beings.

I do hold grudges against certain people though. Maybe not the kind that keeps me thinking about them everyday, but certainly some that have been shit people without any apparent reason and, in some cases, I recognize I'm just being petty, which further proves that it's just a human thing, I suppose.

But there is always that one person you can talk with. Everybody has one. Be it a friend, a therapist, a SO or a friend on the internet. We always benefit from talking with someone, even just from listening to them.

When I was in college, I went through a very dark moment, but there was this friend from highschool. He himself was going under some deep shit, but all of a sudden, he came up with this dynamic in which he would send me a youtube video, a "fail compilation" or similar funny content and we would watch it together. We would count to three and hit play, so that we could react in real time at the same stuff. Sometimes it was just a couple of vids, sometimes we would stay up late. Other times, these voice calls would turn into debates about whatever.

I don't think either of us knew it back then, but we were saving each other just by interacting.

So yes, I think your disdain for humanity as a whole is completely legit, justified even. But the individual? There surely is an individual you can, at the very least, tolerate, I'm sure. Not saying this to disregard your feelings or to plant myself as some sort of victor over a philosophical debate, but rather... Maybe you could find solace in that.
 
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lnlybnny

Arcanist
Jan 25, 2024
498
hate is a strong feeling... i've felt it several times through life but, honestly, nowadays...

it sorta grew into apathy, i feel

when you seriously begin to consider CTB for real, planning etc, theres a chance you might stop giving as much of a fuck about people, society etc
I feel hate for what they want to turn me into. I feel numb and apathetic most times I just get angry when they come at me thinking they know what's best for me, they don't even know me
artists, musicians, writers, etc.
I understand you. That's why I put the (almost) in the tittle haha. My favorite artists help me navigate and they show me how life can be beautiful, which contributes LARGELY to my SI
 
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Life'sA6itch

Student
Oct 29, 2023
141
There's a lot of people I don't like and a growing number who I truly hate. Like you, I hate the trivialities and needless offenses as well. For instance, when people ask how are you, but continue to talk even if you simply say fine or well. Or, the people who cause you danger or inconvenience yet, do not want to be held accountable and instead act wildly aggressive when if not for their actions there would be no issue. The problem is, there are many, many people who do things of this nature and I find the more people I interact with offline, the more reasons I am confronted with to hate them. So, isolation it is. I can't change effed up people and I have enough problems to deal with rather than venturing out and needlessly finding more.
 
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