dogemn

dogemn

All the nights I don't die
May 30, 2023
70
After finding out about all the resources from this site, were you more willing to CTB?
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
37,160
Simply just existing here made me aware of the fact that suicide will always be the desirable option, to me it's always preferable to not exist, the fact that existence is full of suffering, is unappealing and is a futile process of slowly decaying from age made me come to that conclusion. Existence is what would make me choose suicide, we are all destined to die anyway so I would always see it as being preferable to exit on my own terms to take control and escape from all unnecessary suffering, the reality is that to me existing could never be worth enduring, I see the existence of life as being a horrific mistake in the first place.
 
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isthisit?

isthisit?

The name's Cedrik
Jun 23, 2023
134
After finding out about all the resources from this site, were you more willing to CTB?
I wouldn't say that it made me more willing to ctb but it sure helped me with picking out which way to go.
 
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girlsboysthems

girlsboysthems

no i dont have a gun
Dec 19, 2022
417
no, not really. ive been suicidal for so many years and ive been searching for a forum like this on the dark web and i found it on clear net. it doesnt change much, but it does give this harm reduction vibe, like finding ways that are less painful, incase the person survives leaves less damage and finding a community.
 
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A

anonaon

Student
Feb 26, 2023
184
Nope, if anything it saved me from jumping to my death
 
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meowingnomore

meowingnomore

Member
Jun 24, 2023
29
this site was actually really hard to find for me with how hard sites like google try to bury it, i cant imagine many people would come upon this site without already really wanting to ctb in the first place
 
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J

jar-baby

Arcanist
Jun 20, 2023
482
No, being suicidal led me here. It didn't even help that much with picking a method— I found out about SN before I came here through a browser search and subsequent reading of the PPH. If anything, this site's brought me comfort since I've found people to relate to and I get to hear about philosophies surrounding suicide that don't just boil down to the circular notion that death is bad because life is intrinsically good.
 
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J

Jolene79

Experienced
Jun 16, 2023
205
I'm a 'typical' moral, decent member of society who has been dealt an incredibly cruel hand. Continuing to decline in a horrific way because of my poor health terrifies me and causes extreme upset. I came here looking for the most non violent methods so not to add even more pain for me and those around me.
Being able to openly say how I feel, how I am terrified of carrying on like this and all the other opportunities to discuss peaceful methods has helped keep me going! Telling people not to be silly, not to mention it and hope they get saved is cruel and naive. No one is helping me. I have begged and begged and with resources as they are along with complete apathy, we are left to it. I've spent months in hospital watching how the elderly are treated. Trust me when I tell anyone reading this, your absolute worst nightmare. I have never once seen anything here encouraging suicide. All I see is the opposite. Support and understanding for the most part.
 
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Sapphire

Sapphire

Student
Nov 22, 2022
186
I was already suicidal before I found the website. I found this site by accident when I was trying to research methods online. I joined to find a more reliable method. Being on this site hasn't made me more or less likely to do it. It's a myth that talking about suicide will plant the idea in someone's head and make them more likely to do it. You can't brainwash someone into killing themselves.
 
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locked*n*loaded

locked*n*loaded

Archangel
Apr 15, 2022
7,262
Not at all. The only thing this site did was help me with my method. I was suicidal long before finding Sasu. This site doesn't make me more, or less likely, to CTB. Life circumstances brought me to wanting to CTB. SaSu had nothing to do with that.
 
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PinkyStat

PinkyStat

It’s killing me
Jun 4, 2023
143
Nope, It makes me more confortable to relate to people stories here, I also have been suicidal before finding this site
 
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Fktw0rld

Fktw0rld

An end with suffering > Suffering without an end
Aug 29, 2022
404
Nah, I chose suicide long before this site existed. This site has kept me alive for an additional 2 years. Finally found like minded people and a place where I can talk without being shot down, shunned or judged for my depression and DiD.
 
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H

hananover

Member
Jun 27, 2023
13
I've wanted to die for ages, but finding this site feels like confirmation that I'm making the right choice. It's comforting to finally find people that are also seeking a way out of this life.
 
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Lost Magic

Lost Magic

Illuminated
May 5, 2020
3,052
I wanted to go before I joined the site, but it has been a great support network for me amongst other things.
 
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dogemn

dogemn

All the nights I don't die
May 30, 2023
70
Nah, I chose suicide long before this site existed. This site has kept me alive for an additional 2 years. Finally found like minded people and a place where I can talk without being shot down, shunned or judged for my depression and DiD.
Same! Suicide is something that's been on my mind for years but I've only been able to open up about it through this forum. I love finding non-judgmental people here
 
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Sweet Tart

Sweet Tart

Arcanist
May 10, 2023
452
A curious question because no one finds this site unless they are looking for it, i.e. already thinking about suicide and seeking a community where it is okay to discuss this taboo topic in any way that feels relevant. I'm so relieved to have found the courage to come here, as I knew about it for a few years before joining but was too scared to be open with myself (and others) about how I felt.
 
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M

melwarson

Member
May 20, 2023
76
After finding out about all the resources from this site, were you more willing to CTB?
No. Not at all. I've been researching it for a couple of years. This site has been therapeutic to ask questions and to openly talk about it without being judged. 💕
 
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U

Unending

Enlightened
Nov 5, 2022
1,517
If anything, this site has played a role in influencing me to live. It's the offensive belief that I am irrational for being mentally ill that makes me want to die, among other things, but the point is that I find it uplifting for there to be at least one place where it is acknowledged that no one has the right to hold others captive without a very good reason, and the general consensus on what constitutes an individual to be unsound of mind is beyond irrational in itself.
 
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Livingvsdying25

Livingvsdying25

Enlightened
Dec 8, 2019
1,188
No. I came on here bc of how desperately I wanted to die. I came on here bc I had no one in my life at the time. This website has helped me stay alive & feel less alone.
 
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crimsonpool

crimsonpool

hikikomori
May 15, 2023
96
i wanted to do it before but yeah im more sure now
 
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Clut

Clut

Member
Feb 28, 2020
68
No, it gives me somewhere I can talk and read and discuss it openly and also is helping to find an ideal method that will be the most peaceful and least painful for me. Its not made me want it more its actually just giving me comfort that I might be able to find a way out that I can talk to people who won't either freak out or bite my head off for mentioning it. I appreciate it so much
 
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S

System28

Student
Oct 14, 2022
103
nop was searching for methods and found this site
 
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gottablast888

gottablast888

Student
Apr 15, 2022
171
I found this site because i want to ctb not the other way around
 
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MusicGuy

MusicGuy

We're just another statistic
May 28, 2023
118
Most people here we're already suicidal, this site just provides info and help.
 
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GrizzlyGrapefruit

GrizzlyGrapefruit

Student
Jun 17, 2019
121
I was already super suicidal by the time I found this site years ago. Funnily enough, this site is the reason why I'm still here today.

Still suicidal, but the community here made me realize that I wasn't 100% confident that I wanted to CTB yet, and if I was going to CTB, then I should be certain of it.

Still suicidal, but making sure I check all the marks off to ensure that this is the way I want things to go.
 
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LaVieEnRose

LaVieEnRose

Angelic
Jul 23, 2022
4,174
Yes. It threatened to kill all my family and friends if I didn't CTB.

/s
 
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InaudibleEcho

InaudibleEcho

Oh, it’s a reasonable sacrifice
Jun 23, 2023
45
There were a few reasons I refrained from attempting to CTB.
1-I was afraid of surviving
2-all the methods I knew were to difficult/brutal
This website solved both problems and deep down that's what I've been wanting. I thought of it as being locked in a boring game and I just wanted to exit and this website was the tutorial.
 
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A

Anonymous1997ES

Member
Jul 30, 2021
82
Already wanted to die a long time ago before finding out the website existed...
 
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L

leavingsoon99

I'm at peace... Finally.
Mar 16, 2023
722
Hardly. Life decided for me a long time ago. This site is just a good place to help me along to my ctb date. I love chatting with some of the people on here. This is a good place to be open and honest about my feelings.
 
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Her's

Her's

I can't say that I saw it coming.
Jun 27, 2023
17
It's comfy to know if everything goes wrong I have a way out, so yeah this site make me more prone to CTB in the future
 
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