Did I have a panic attack?

[Wolframium]

For context, I had been clean from sh for about 4 months. But a couple of weeks ago I started again, and I do it when my mind decides to ruin my day. And I want to point out that I'm not afraid of blood, so it's probably not because of that.

So when I was taking a shower my mind again threw everything worst at me, including more suicidal thoughts. So when I was already somewhat dry, I did what I always do in such situations and played some music to calm myself down. But it didn't help and in the end I did it. A few cuts on my thighs and one deeper one on my stomach. I immediately felt better and calmed down for a moment. But when I wanted to clean up the mess I had made, I experienced a strange feeling. Suddenly I felt terrible, my breathing was fast and everything seemed unreal. As if my vision was drifting away and I felt like I was going to throw up. When I stood up, my head spun even more and I felt even worse. I barely grabbed the handle and left the bathroom, then fell to my knees and fainted for a few seconds. When I came to, I felt incredibly exhausted and barely made it to my bed and lay down for a few minutes trying to calm down. I held my phone to my ear and tried to focus on the music, and after a longer while I finally calmed down. I had never been so scared before.

A few months ago I had something similar, but back then it was more like derealization, illogical fear and exhaustion. It hit me on the bus and it was awful, I couldn't think, I was numb and I could barely get home. But then I've cut myself after this ?attack?, I think. This time it was the opposite, and I don't know what to think about it anymore.

So my question is: could it actually have been a panic attack? If these really were panic attacks, I have no idea what to do about it. I guess I just want to know what's happening to me.
I would appreciate any information.

 

[astr4]

illogical fear and exhaustion sounds like a panic attack. but just the dizziness and derealization and fainting sounds more like a medical condition, to be honest.

in my experience panic attacks do have the heavy fast breathing, hyperventilating, panic, i felt like i couldn't breathe properly no matter how much air i was getting, i thought i would suffocate on air even though that wasn't realistic.

I AM NOT A DOCTOR THIS IS NOT MEDICAL ADVICE but i am curious what your day looked like. did you eat anything that day? you said you had just gotten out of the shower, was it particularly hot water? and you mentioned feeling worse when you stood up, that makes me think blood pressure. does seeing blood ever make you faint? you mentioned not being afraid of it but i've heard people who will pass out despite not feeling any fear of blood. the cutting sounds almost unrelated to the dizziness but again i'm no expert.

 

[Wolframium]

It was Sunday. I ate breakfast and immediately went to take a shower, and the water was rather lukewarm. As for the blood, well i've seen it more times than I can count. Especially when I cuts myself and it didn't cause such effects. And I haven't mentioned if before, but before I stood up I have feel some kind of fear. But it fade out when I fainted.

 

[Worndown]

Short term, semi-medical advice the has been circulating...eat a few Sour Patch Kids.
The taste "shock" is strong enough it makes your brain focus on what you just put in your mouth.
Not a solution, but it might be enough for you to get out of this situation unscathed.

 

[Wolframium]

That's a really interesting idea. I'd never thought of that. I have quite a bit of citric acid lying around, which I think is in those candies. I hope I won't have to use it, but thanks so much for the tip.