Venting desperation to die keeps kicking in

[true-ending]

sorry for the amount of vent posts lately, LOL. been going through it. anyway.

gotta live for at least another month 'cause my brother has something he wants to do with me, you see, and it'd be terribly cruel to leave him before then, but christ am i fucking suffering. i dont even have SN lined up so chances are ill have to live well into 2024. i just don't want to do this anymore.

it hurts and i spend every day dreading and anxious. whats even the fucking point, man? im so tired all the time. i hope i die in my sleep soon so that i can finally fucking die, but i wont have to feel guilty about ditching my brother and all that shit. he'll get over it, i hope. i really fucking hope.

 

[SVEN]

Vent all you want here, though we can't help, we do get how hard each and every day can be.

 

[heavyeyes]

Hey don't feel bad for posting a lot. That's what this forum is here for.

I'm sorry you're suffering so much. The desperation to die gets to be unbearable for me too. Also the guilt

 

[FuneralCry]

I understand that it really can be so torturous and dreadful feeling trapped here when you just wish to leave but anyway best wishes. I certainly hate how there isn't the option to just choose to never wake again.

 

[XXXWRLD]

I read about people running into the fire at burning man to ctb, but also how that was hard for some to witness.

Ngl I wish we hosted a burning man type event where we could get together and have a giant fire to run into and a safe space in general where we could ctb in peace.