Venting desperate times: desperate measures

[thronesick]

at my school there's an officer well two they carry real guns and as my ctb plan runs short ( hanging {no where to hang} carbon monoxide {too expensive too complicated} and jumping {might survive don't know how to get on the top of a building in a city.) i'm desperate and i'm running out of ways. i've been impulsively thinking of getting in a altercation with one and taking their gun to shoot myself but if it goes faulty i get expelled and admitted into a facility. i have no one to talk me out of it and i'm sorry it's a stupid a plan but i don't know what else to do my dads out of state he's the only person i'd be able to access a gun from or the police officer that's my neighbor.