When mine was regular I lost interest in stuff, things felt meaningless. I lost interest in video games, it felt like a chore. But I was still free to do what I wanted to do, essentially. And I did. I got re-educated, I worked in my dream job for 2 years. I spent a lot of time biking, and watching TV shows. When depression reaches a certain point, it becomes impossible to do things. When the feel-good chemicals in your brain shuts down to that extent, it feels like you're in a permanent heroin withdrawal. You can't even watch a movie anymore. I'm reduced to laying in bed and doing nothing, or being here (which requires a lot from me because it feels horrible), and I can't even lay still in bed. I can't think of many fates worse than this, because this isn't even a terminal illness. I could live to an old age with this, for all I know.