Venting Demonized for not seeking “help”

[Ghost2211]

I told my therapist I'm done talking. I tried to talk to her about how I'm feeling and I got threatened with cps and well checks. She told me I'm required to get a psych evaluation if to continue therapy. I feel anxious and like it's invasive to be pressured into talking to people I don't want to, and if I just bs my way through it it will result in end of therapy anyway. My ex told me I'm not trying hard enough to get help and recover. The fact that I get up and get everything done and am still alive means I'm "trying hard enough".

All I learned from asking for help and trying to talk to people around me that supposedly care was to shut up and smile. Asking for help got me guilted, shamed, threatened, and yelled at. Fuck them all, and fuck their help which is nothing but control and manipulation.

Thank you all for existing. Without you guys I would be alone.

 

[oopswronglife]

It's wrong and unfair you have to suffer that. It's a hard lesson to learn that most people come at everything for their own benefit and control. Once you acknowledge though that it frees you a bit because you can see very quickly if someone is genuine or not and know how to proceed. It doesn't make it feel better or any less unfair...but rather than wasting time trying to convince, reason, fight the unfairness you can choose to play the game and extract yourself if they are like this...or to relax and be honest in the rare times you get a good person in your path. It's not easy...I laid awake most of the night ruminating about a crappy family member no matter how much I tried to refocus my attention...sometimes it just gets you...but it's also saved me many times when I felt the urge to argue, fight back, explain, reason...but the angel on my shoulder was tapping me and saying "not going to help...not worth it...breathe and move on." I have spent so much time and energy on immovable objects known as egos. Actively trying my best not to is the only way I have lasted THIS long.

 

[Lostnotfound]

Ive been through the evaluations, and the therapy .... many times and many different types and its just wasted my time. Granted I had nothing better to do but it made not one ounce of difference so the best advice I can offer is to do what's right for you there and then at that moment in time. Fuck the rest of it, you know how you feel and unless they can change your feelings (they cant) they dont know.

Do whats right for you!