Delivery concerns (SN)

[Caspers]

I bought SN online from a Polish seller and I'm worried that when the package turns up, mum will ask questions. She's been searching my room and asking a lot of questions recently, and has threatened to call the police on me. What kind of excuse could I give her for the SN which may have Polish writing? Also I'm hopefully moving out soon and am planning on installing a lock this weekend, so I don't need to worry about her searching again, although I will try to hide it as best I can.

 

[HeavensOpenDoor]

Installing a lock on your door is a definite red flag!

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

She already has red flags. She doesn't have a right to go through the belongings of another adult, whether it's under her roof or not.

Not arguing with you, I just get pissed at that kind of stuff. I had a mother who always self-justified a variety of controlling and intrusive behaviors because I was under her roof, even when I paid rent.

@Caspers can you hide it off the property? Bury it somewhere? If she asks questions, can you tell her it's not open for discussion and ride out all of the bullshit that will follow?

 

[Sinai Silence]

Same has happened to me Casper its difficult to deal with someone like that. You are completely right, she shouldn't go through your belongings.

Since mine had Russian writing she questioned me about it. I just said I was an agent working for the KGB and that's all I told her.

You can come up with any excuse you see is fit, if she presses you further just tell her you don't need to explain yourself. Its your mail and she should respect your privacy.

If you don't feel comfortable having the package delivered to your house is there anyway you could have it delivered to your local post office or depot?

 

[Caspers]

She already has red flags. She doesn't have a right to go through the belongings of another adult, whether it's under her roof or not.

Not arguing with you, I just get pissed at that kind of stuff. I had a mother who always self-justified a variety of controlling and intrusive behaviors because I was under her roof, even when I paid rent.

@Caspers can you hide it off the property? Bury it somewhere? If she asks questions, can you tell her it's not open for discussion and ride out all of the bullshit that will follow?

I'm currently considering all the places I could hide it, just the problem is that if I think it's a good hiding place, she might look there, like in shoe boxes (just thought if it's small enough, I could put it in a shoe. That might be good). My concern is she may have read my diary, which has all my plans to ctb including the website that has the instructions. I've put some coloured sellotape around it that I have hidden so hopefully that would make her less likely to try.

Same has happened to me Casper its difficult to deal with someone like that. You are completely right, she shouldn't go through your belongings.

Since mine had Russian writing she questioned me about it. I just said I was an agent working for the KGB and that's all I told her.

You can come up with any excuse you see is fit, if she presses you further just tell her you don't need to explain yourself. Its your mail and she should respect your privacy.

If you don't feel comfortable having the package delivered to your house is there anyway you could have it delivered to your local post office or depot?

Yeah it really hurt me and broke a lot of trust (both with her and in general), thankfully my father is helping me install a lock this weekend. I really can't think of an excuse, especially if she's seen my diary. Thankfully she decided to leave home for a while, but my dad is concerned too, but he's pro choice and he understands that sometimes demons are too hard to tackle. He wants me to stay though of course, but he doesn't agree with my mother. Also I bought it nearly a month ago, so unfortunately I can't get it to go to a different address.

 

[autumnal]

[...]
My concern is she may have read my diary, which has all my plans to ctb including the website that has the instructions. I've put some coloured sellotape around it that I have hidden so hopefully that would make her less likely to try.

You keep a diary where you've listed all your plans to suicide, and you think some sellotape is going to protect it?!

If you are serious about suicide, you also need to get serious about not being detected. Keeping an unsecured diary is an incredibly bad idea. Not only will it tip off your mother, but she can easily show it to authorities for the purposes of justifying you being committed to hospital involuntarily. If you must keep a diary, type it on your computer or phone and protect it with a secure password that you don't use anywhere else.

'Some coloured sellotape'. God help us

[...] Also I bought it nearly a month ago, so unfortunately I can't get it to go to a different address.

In most postal services, you can request a redirection or hold of your mail. It's typically used by people going on holiday or moving house etc. Might be worth looking into. You can typically request it based on the individual names of the recipient, rather than for the entire household.