Venting Dating sucks now

[ClownW0rld]

To be honest, it really doesn't even seem worth the effort. I'm a male and about 2 years ago I hooked up girl and the whole process felt very awkward. I would prefer a relationship, but I'm not opposed to the idea of hookups/casual sex, but it has to feel organic. I feel like I have to get to know someone somewhat well before I could feel comfortable being intimate with them. It seems like nowadays though, nobody does this. The more time goes by, it seems that nobody really dates at all and just engages in short term dating/casual sex. It appears most guys just want easy to access to sex and most girls grow accustomed to or perhaps even prefer these toxic and irresponsible men, and it destroys their ability to pair bond and distorts their view on men. Ideally, I would like to meet someone I could build a life around or at least spend a few quality years with, but it doesn't seem like my generation (I'm 21) appreciates or practices this form of dating. I don't struggle to attract women. I look decent I guess and I don't have Asperger's or any behavioral hindrances like that. I just feel like my standards for intimacy are a lot higher than most people's.

Just to let everyone know in advance, I don't intend whatsoever for this to be an incel type of post. I don't specifically hate women, I hate all people, men and women included and feel men and women bear equal responsibility for the shitty state of modern dating.

 

[bijou]

i also think the way that we try and meet people now a days is really inorganic and contributes to that as well. i've never enjoyed the format of interacting with people on dating apps. it feels…desperate and weird, we are told all our life not to meet up with strangers online, and now it's so highly encouraged! i guess i'm lucky in the fact i met my boyfriend in an irl by-chance kind of way.

now that i have experienced long-term love and partnership, i can never go back to that complete lack of emotional intimacy. it just opened me up to being take advantage of. i'm ur age as well and i can agree with a lot of what you're saying. hook-up culture blows!!!

 

[Spiked_Coffee]

To be honest, it really doesn't even seem worth the effort. I'm a male and about 2 years ago I hooked up girl and the whole process felt very awkward. I would prefer a relationship, but I'm not opposed to the idea of hookups/casual sex, but it has to feel organic. I feel like I have to get to know someone somewhat well before I could feel comfortable being intimate with them. It seems like nowadays though, nobody does this. The more time goes by, it seems that nobody really dates at all and just engages in short term dating/casual sex. It appears most guys just want easy to access to sex and most girls grow accustomed to or perhaps even prefer these toxic and irresponsible men, and it destroys their ability to pair bond and distorts their view on men. Ideally, I would like to meet someone I could build a life around or at least spend a few quality years with, but it doesn't seem like my generation (I'm 21) appreciates or practices this form of dating. I don't struggle to attract women. I look decent I guess and I don't have Asperger's or any behavioral hindrances like that. I just feel like my standards for intimacy are a lot higher than most people's.

Just to let everyone know in advance, I don't intend whatsoever for this to be an incel type of post. I don't specifically hate women, I hate all people, men and women included and feel men and women bear equal responsibility for the shitty state of modern dating.

I feel the same way, i have this thing that i love everything what is natural, for example i love when girls dont wear make ups, or when thay have natural colored hair and its the same with all the other stuff and as you said with relationships also.

Its sad that we got to this with all the technology and availability to all those stimulus you couldnt imagine before. All that porn, all those instagrams tick tocks, people just want more and faster of everuthing and thats a problem with our generation (i am 20). I think the problem is not only in people but in the system which we built and by the "system" i mean all the corporations like instagram, facebook, pornhub, onlyfans etc. which are destroying our minds and our society. Technology which was made for studying, for connecting whith other people, for educational purposes is instead mostly abused and destroying us as society. In my opinion the worst is that corporation are gaining lots of money from it and they wont stop in growing this evilly used technology. Dont get me wrong, i dont say technology is bad, no, its just a tool like a knife with which you can harm someone or just cut a vegatable. And a very bad thing is that people dont understand this, they dont know how badly it influence them and when they start to understand its mostly too late, because their brain is just addicted to it.

I really hope there will be someone or something that will change that evil system in which we are stuck now.

 

[cassxtho]

I feel like I have to get to know someone somewhat well before I could feel comfortable being intimate with them. It seems like nowadays though, nobody does this. The more time goes by, it seems that nobody really dates at all and just engages in short term dating/casual sex.

I'm a girl and I've had this issue as well. My rule is we have to have been dating for at least 6 months before even thinking about that type of thing. I would say a year, but I know most guys won't hold out that long. I don't feel good about giving myself up in that way to somebody so easily like I'm a slut.