Damn i hate the feeling of hope

[anh tran]

I thought i am so ready that i set up perfectly nitrogen method with eebd hood and did hire somebody to remove everything to make it look like natural death but damn . The hope feeling came back and recently the date that I want to do it all the relatives just barely show how much they love me and especially my girlfriend , i feel deeply guilty if I pursuit. I think that I gonna quit my plan and try it 1 more time even deeply I hate the repetition and hate the world. I love you guys I hope that after 3-5 years I will come back this forum and be a better version.

 

[hhtroc]

please do me a favor and exhaust all your options before you make your decision. I know this is the wrong site to say this but you have a girlfriend and a family that i guess kinda cares. But I relate to the hope but I am starting to realize that I dont even have a family that cares and the longing for death feels more calm than a small hope blossoming and being crushed by the devastating reality. Take care and you are in my thoughts.

 

[worthless creature]

i wish the best for you and your journey.

 

[HighwayToRockBottom]

Good luck ♡ I believe in you