Venting Cutting

[ag0raph0b1a]

After probably 2-3 years of being clean I self harmed again today. It seemed like the only thing I could do to get some release to how I was feeling.

 

[NeedAnEscape]

You're not alone. I was nearly four years clean, and I lost it last week. I feel so empty. If you want to talk about it, my PMs are open.

 

[Tefnu]

I cut sometimes, too, and it can feel like a huge personal failure when you relapse back into it. But you're doing what you need to do to cope. Sometimes we go back to bad habits and that's okay. This is how you controlled your emotions. We can always start that streak again. And while it's painful to look at your cuts and think of them as failures, it's better than not finding an outlet.

You're doing good, because you're still here. Even if it's not the ideal way to manage your emotions, you're another step closer. Cutting again doesn't bring you down to zero days 'sober,' It's just another step towards being okay.

Im rooting for you

 

[zeek]

i started today
doesnt make me feel any sort of way, but the cut looks ugly so i needa fresh it up
what is it supposed to feel like

 

[ag0raph0b1a]

You're not alone. I was nearly four years clean, and I lost it last week. I feel so empty. If you want to talk about it, my PMs are open.

It's nice to know I'm not alone in this. Thank you.

I cut sometimes, too, and it can feel like a huge personal failure when you relapse back into it. But you're doing what you need to do to cope. Sometimes we go back to bad habits and that's okay. This is how you controlled your emotions. We can always start that streak again. And while it's painful to look at your cuts and think of them as failures, it's better than not finding an outlet.

You're doing good, because you're still here. Even if it's not the ideal way to manage your emotions, you're another step closer. Cutting again doesn't bring you down to zero days 'sober,' It's just another step towards being okay.

Im rooting for you

Thank you for the amazing response, I'm rooting for you as well!

i started today
doesnt make me feel any sort of way, but the cut looks ugly so i needa fresh it up
what is it supposed to feel like

I wouldn't say that there's a certain way that it's meant to feel, but what I would say is consistent for most who self harm is a feeling of relief, Some people feel numb and want to feel anything even pain, some people feel so much pain that doing it in a controlled form that they can quantify is gratifying. I'm not even sure why I find it so helpful but after doing it today I felt much less suicidal than I did when I woke up.