CTO Extended. Psychiatrists Are Disillusioned Idiots.

[timechained]

I have attempted to CTB on medication and off medication, so medication clearly doesn't play a factor.

Failing after many methods is what has made me more cautious in selecting the next method because I don't want it to fail and then be left in a worse state, thus becoming a burden on others.

According to my psychiatrists medication has lessened the severity of those feelings; bullshit.

They take this period of time of no attempts to mean I'm doing well on medication, disillusioned idiots.

That they are the gatekeepers of those of us who want to die and force useless medication is just wrong.

They just make me want to CTB even more...

 

[User111885]

This is a common experience.

Psychiatrists will often prescribe something, then write down after you are doing better on it. It justifies their usage and the expense of the visit and is helpful for insurance purposes. The problem is, often what happens is if you say 1 thing, like have a visit and say "yeah i had a good day" they take it out of context to justify their assessment or just assess you without even your input on how you are feeling. There's also a certain amount of confirmation bias: they select medication X based on their training and they think it will help, they next time they see you they will look for signs that it's helping. Even beyond their desire for money and control, some psychiatrist are also just biased. It's impossible to even assess without bias but what sucks about these records is there is no way to clarify them later with your addendum, at least not easily.

Adding insult to injury, once they do this and say the meds are helping and you are mentally ill, if you stop then you are "non-compliant" and "in denial" and "lack insight" and so then you're an idiot who isn't taking meds that are clearly helping you because you are crazy, according to their notes. And with their education, and labeling you as crazy in one form or another, your words and opinion become meaningless.

It's awful.