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NMOP3PISdn

NMOP3PISdn

Member
Nov 5, 2021
66
I was planning on ctb by 2am today but I ended up getting caught up at work and broke my fast because I got so hungry and ended up working 2 more hours than my scheduled shift. I ended up eating because I needed the energy. I only have OTC meds to assist me on this as I do not have access to the suggested meds on STAN's Guide to SN. I am debating wether or not I should do it tonight or wait til tomorrow. My tolerance for pain is quite high and I think I can handle the pain that may go with not having the RX recommended. But I feel like it may take longer to take effect if I had something to eat. I can handle pain but I would rather have to suffer a shorter time of pain as much as possible if that makes sense. What do you guys think?
Also I want to save you guys the hassle of reading through what is making me want to CTB. I find it a bit pathetic (my reason) all I know is that I have been suffering from emotional pain for the last 4 months and I am tired of it.
I am however glad to have found this community. I have been on this site for the last 5 days reading about everyone's situation and I understand and can relate to most of what everyone is going through. I feel much more calm about CTB on my part because of this community and have found peace in knowing that some people will understand why I am doing it.
 
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_elliott

_elliott

sweet adeline.
Apr 24, 2021
148
SN won't give you pain, really. you'll feel gross and pukey but not pain. you should be fine. try to relax, hun, you'll be alright. take a deep breath, relax. maybe this just isn't the time to do something drastic like this in the first place. whatever you choose i wish you luck and a peaceful travel.
 
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NMOP3PISdn

NMOP3PISdn

Member
Nov 5, 2021
66
SN won't give you pain, really. you'll feel gross and pukey but not pain. you should be fine. try to relax, hun, you'll be alright. take a deep breath, relax. maybe this just isn't the time to do something drastic like this in the first place. whatever you choose i wish you luck and a peaceful travel.
I just finished reading a post from a member named icetea15 who documented his experience on taking SN and going to the hospital right after. It makes me confident that I can do it, maybe even going with a lower dose than what STANS GUIDE TO SN.
 
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S

Someone123

Illuminated
Oct 19, 2021
3,875
I just finished reading a post from a member named icetea15 who documented his experience on taking SN and going to the hospital right after. It makes me confident that I can do it, maybe even going with a lower dose than what STANS GUIDE TO SN.
The closer people stick to Stan's guide the better, from the posts I have seen. It's already not possible to do the recommended fasting window (or even close to it) so I would wait for another day. There out three main outcomes with SN: ctb with little distress, ctb with a lot of distress(which can alert people to rescue you from the noise so that you don't ctb), and for it to not work and to end up in the hospital for a while, which can make a person's life that much worse. I know you want relief from your pain as soon as you can get it, but there are many things in Stan's guide designed to get the results that some people want. The more shortcuts on fasting and supporting medications the less chance of it working, though I know of a recent case (@Cheers) where she seemed to ctb without meto but with an otc alternative (Meclizine), so this shortcut seemed to work out for her because she did everything else carefully very close to the plan. So many peope think they can will their way through shortcuts, but if your body wants to barf, it's going to barf, and many people just can not get themselves to take any more sn after barfing so they call an ambulance due to the pain.
 
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NMOP3PISdn

NMOP3PISdn

Member
Nov 5, 2021
66
The closer people stick to Stan's guide the better, from the posts I have seen. It's already not possible to do the recommended fasting window (or even close to it) so I would wait for another day. There out three main outcomes with SN: ctb with little distress, ctb with a lot of distress(which can alert people to rescue you from the noise so that you don't ctb), and for it to not work and to end up in the hospital for a while, which can make a person's life that much worse. I know you want relief from your pain as soon as you can get it, but there are many things in Stan's guide designed to get the results that some people want. The more shortcuts on fasting and supporting medications the less chance of it working, though I know of a recent case (@Cheers) where she seemed to ctb without meto but with an otc alternative (Meclizine), so this shortcut seemed to work out for her because she did everything else carefully very close to the plan. So many peope think they can will their way through shortcuts, but if your body wants to barf, it's going to barf, and many people just can not get themselves to take any more sn after barfing so they call an ambulance due to the pain.
I get it. The reason I am confident that i may be able to pull it off is because I am planning on doing it somewhere very secluded and at least an hour away from a hospital. Once I take it I know that if I don't go through with it and decide to call for help I will come to my senses and know that if i get help a little too late then I will most likely get brain damage. That alone will not make me want to live and try to call for help. I am a very critical thinker. Some people say I am stubborn but I see it as being realistic. I'm still not sure if I am going to do it a few hours from now but I definitely will be doing it either way.
 
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Someone123

Illuminated
Oct 19, 2021
3,875
I get it. The reason I am confident that i may be able to pull it off is because I am planning on doing it somewhere very secluded and at least an hour away from a hospital. Once I take it I know that if I don't go through with it and decide to call for help I will come to my senses and know that if i get help a little too late then I will most likely get brain damage. That alone will not make me want to live and try to call for help. I am a very critical thinker. Some people say I am stubborn but I see it as being realistic. I'm still not sure if I am going to do it a few hours from now but I definitely will be doing it either way.
I know what you mean about definitely doing it either way, I understand some people, myself included, really just need to stop their pain somehow. But even if you are in a remote location if you throw up it is very unlikely to work- the 12 hour fasting window, including the last 2 hours without water, seems very important to reduce the risk of vomiting.
 
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NMOP3PISdn

NMOP3PISdn

Member
Nov 5, 2021
66
I know what you mean about definitely doing it either way, I understand some people, myself included, really just need to stop their pain somehow. But even if you are in a remote location if you throw up it is very unlikely to work- the 12 hour fasting window, including the last 2 hours without water, seems very important to reduce the risk of vomiting.
There is a post from a member named "icetea15" about his experience on taking SN but not taking 20-25mg that STANS guide suggest. He took just the lethal amount which is 2mg. I don't plan on taking just 2mg but I feel that if I take 10-15 it will make it easier for me to keep it in. I recommend reading it as it may shed some light as to why I think this way.
 
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S

Someone123

Illuminated
Oct 19, 2021
3,875
There is a post from a member named "icetea15" about his experience on taking SN but not taking 20-25mg that STANS guide suggest. He took just the lethal amount which is 2mg. I don't plan on taking just 2mg but I feel that if I take 10-15 it will make it easier for me to keep it in. I recommend reading it as it may shed some light as to why I think this way.
Thanks for the recommendation- I did read most of that post- it was so long I didn't read every detail, but I do know that 2g didn't seem to come close to working. I guess it wa ok for him to have a failed attempt, but I really want to try to avoid this. Lethal doses are tricky, 10 - 15g could be ok, but I have heard of people surviving 10g because it wasn't enough, I'm pretty sure. A very interesting case is a member named Cheers who seemed to ctb 9 days ago. Her posts from October 30th are very helpful for a protocol where a person doesn't have meto. She said she was slender and she took 20g of SN. She posted details as she went through the process. She has a previous post about her protocol that was also helpful. I think she was in Europe so for some medications I did need to look for the U.S. comparables. I have looked at pretty many SN posts and so far I have found hers to be the most helpful.
 
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NMOP3PISdn

NMOP3PISdn

Member
Nov 5, 2021
66
I've read quite a few myself. There was someone who posted a spreadsheet of success stories from SS. I read basically all of them that night I saw it. The most interesting one was the one that has video called one of the SS members and sh was documenting what was goin on during the attempt, which seemed to be a success btw.
Are you from the US?
 
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marinekiwi

marinekiwi

Student
Oct 28, 2021
148
I've read quite a few myself. There was someone who posted a spreadsheet of success stories from SS. I read basically all of them that night I saw it. The most interesting one was the one that has video called one of the SS members and sh was documenting what was goin on during the attempt, which seemed to be a success btw.
Are you from the US?
Yeah, that case you mention is a pretty well documented success with SN. As you can read, there was no major discomfort. Mostly heavy breathing which given that you'll get knocked out pretty fast is not that big deal.
SN is rated 7/10 on the scale of peacefulness by the PPH (10/10 being N, way harder and expensive to obtain). So that means (and you can read in first hand experiences at this very forum) that the SN causes some discomfort in the first few minutes. That discomfort can be reduced by taking painkillers, benzo and AE.
Either way, most people seem to fall unconscious within 15-20 minutes from ingestion. I sure can endure 15-20 min of slight discomfort, knowing i'll soon pass out and there will be no more feelings after that.

Take your time to research, so you can have a most peaceful exit when time comes. Hope you can someday find relief from this hellhole.
 
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blueclover_.

blueclover_.

Better Never to Have Been: 2006, David Benatar
Oct 11, 2021
668
The closer people stick to Stan's guide the better, from the posts I have seen. It's already not possible to do the recommended fasting window (or even close to it) so I would wait for another day. There out three main outcomes with SN: ctb with little distress, ctb with a lot of distress(which can alert people to rescue you from the noise so that you don't ctb), and for it to not work and to end up in the hospital for a while, which can make a person's life that much worse. I know you want relief from your pain as soon as you can get it, but there are many things in Stan's guide designed to get the results that some people want. The more shortcuts on fasting and supporting medications the less chance of it working, though I know of a recent case (@Cheers) where she seemed to ctb without meto but with an otc alternative (Meclizine), so this shortcut seemed to work out for her because she did everything else carefully very close to the plan. So many peope think they can will their way through shortcuts, but if your body wants to barf, it's going to barf, and many people just can not get themselves to take any more sn after barfing so they call an ambulance due to the pain.
Something about this makes me feel angry. Our bodies want to live even at the cost of torturing our minds. Fuck this world.
 
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