Ctb is one of the toughest things to ever do.

[Someone123]

Especially if you had real hope that your life could turn out better. It's not easy to think of many bigger challenges in life.

 

[bed]

To completely go against your biological survival instincts - can't think of anything more challenging than that.
Always thought, that having a plan and going through with it in a highly emotional impulsive state was the easiest way in the hope to circumvent your brain's ingrained self-preservation.

 

[Someone123]

To completely go against your biological survival instincts - can't think of anything more challenging than that.
Always thought having a plan and going through with it in a highly emotional impulsive state was the easiest way in the hope to circumvent your ingrained self-preservation.

Some people who have done very careful planning have gotten themselves to go through with it, based on their goodbye threads- but survival instinct, as you mentioned, can keep people from focusing enough to see it through.

 

[sewercide]

Yeah. I also have underlying hope but getting gut punched by dissapointment all the time makes me believe that ctb will truly be the way out.

 

[Eternal Soul]

There is a part of me that crave to be here and live a happy life, but this part of me constantly crashes into the pit of depressing reality.

After spending so many years in this situation, I had to come to the realization that that my life wasn't going in a good direction., and I must to take control of my own destiny.

 

[Idontmatter]

I once had hope my depression would get better but that hope is over. For a while I didn't want to die. Now that I've lost hope and motivation I want to die and I'm ready . Each day is harder and harder to hold on until my target ctb date. I'm ready to go and failure is definitely not an option.

 

[Someone123]

I once had hope my depression would get better but that hope is over. For a while I didn't want to die. Now that I've lost hope and motivation I want to die and I'm ready . Each day is harder and harder to hold on until my target ctb date. I'm ready to go and failure is definitely not an option.

I keep missing target dates, though I see others stick to theirs. It's to get that focus to follow through, even though things keep getting worse, and something will have to be done sometime.

 

[Idontmatter]

I keep missing target dates, though I see others stick to theirs. It's to get that focus to follow through, even though things keep getting worse, and something will have to be done sometime.

I'm the same way. I keep postponing. I this time I have no hope left. Now im just curious what is after death… nothingness? Lol

 

[Someone123]

I'm the same way. I keep postponing. I this time I have no hope left. Now im just curious what is after death… nothingness? Lol

I think based on nde's that there is likely another life, that the soul lives on after the body dies, but of course many disagree- who knows for sure. My biggest fear in relation to ctb is a failed attempt.

 

[sewercide]

I think based on nde's that there is likely another life, that the soul lives on after the body dies, but of course many disagree- who knows for sure. My biggest fear in relation to ctb is a failed attempt.

There is a site that mentiones NDEs and how beings are tricked coming back by deceptful entities, aswell as tunnel of light trap at death; http://www.trickedbythelight.com/tbtl/index.html

 

[Idontmatter]

I think based on nde's that there is likely another life, that the soul lives on after the body dies, but of course many disagree- who knows for sure. My biggest fear in relation to ctb is a failed attempt.

We share that fear. I have things prepared so when I drink the sn everything will hopefully go as planned. Just have a couple of more weeks to go as long as I don't postpone again
It will also suck dying alone but it is what it is.,

 

[LaVieEnRose]

I'm the same way. I keep postponing. I this time I have no hope left. Now im just curious what is after death… nothingness? Lol

I don't think it's wise to kill yourself with the expectation of anything but nothingness.

 

[Eternal Oblivion]

Having a good method is very important in order to succeed. I'd only go by N, otherwise I'd have to be very, very underwhelmed.

I don't think it's wise to kill yourself with the expectation of anything but nothingness.

Couldn't agree more.

 

[FuneralCry]

I have never had any hope and I have no interest in a 'better' life, I would always be suicidal no matter what and to me non existence is always preferable to living. I do agree with the title but I think that for me it would depend on the method used, if I had N I would have no problems in leaving this world, but the more easily accessible methods sound risky and horrible so ctb certainly is very difficult for me. The fact that it's so hard to leave this world is the only reason as to why I am still alive. It does make hanging sound so much easier when you hear about all these people dying from it, but in reality it's not easy at all.

 

[Someone123]

I don't think it's wise to kill yourself with the expectation of anything but nothingness.

Well, it's not based on this expectation, the purpose of ctb is to escape things here, but it is not a bad thing for me to hope that it will be better- if it is nothingness we won't know anyway.

 

[Hypocrite_]

I don't think it's wise to kill yourself with the expectation of anything but nothingness.

I don't understand why I hardly ever see any post citing the fear of oblivion as the main reason why they can't CTB.

The ego's primary job is self preservation. What can be more frightening than self-obliteration?

Maybe most are too indoctrinated by religious dogma?

 

[Someone123]

I don't understand why I hardly ever see any post citing the fear of oblivion as the main reason why they can't CTB.

The ego's primary job is self preservation. What can be more frightening than self-obliteration?

Maybe most are too indoctrinated by religious dogma?

I'm not religious but a lot of non religious people have had nde's that are good experiences that seem to connect with a god without and religion being involved. If it is going to be nothingness then that's what it was going to be anyway, so it doesn't change anything over the long term.

 

[Hypocrite_]

I'm not religious but a lot of non religious people have had nde's that are good experiences that seem to connect with a god without and religion being involved. If it is going to be nothingness then that's what it was going to be anyway, so it doesn't change anything over the long term.

I guess for me, the fear of an afterlife of eternal damnation was never a factor of consideration.

I am more afraid of oblivion and the end of my own consciousness, which is subjectively everything.

Even though I am experiencing despair every single day, I guess I can still find some brief respite.

If I'm experiencing unrelenting physical/psychological pain then the end of consciousness wouldn't seem like such a bad thing. Then the main concern would be for whether there is an afterlife in which to feel more pain.

I guess I answered my own question somewhat by replying to you. Thanks.

 

[Someone123]

Maybe thinking of it as it taking courage to leave that would help, but I'm not sure that's exactly right. The body wants to stay, there are still some good ssensations, but the mind wants to leave asap, and the mind knows it would have been better to do this sooner. I overcame some obstacles but not enough of them in time.

 

[LaVieEnRose]

Well, it's not based on this expectation, the purpose of ctb is to escape things here, but it is not a bad thing for me to hope that it will be better- if it is nothingness we won't know anyway.

Well, I get where you're coming from and we can hope for whatever scenario we think is preferable but we still have to expect nothingness. Otherwise we are squandering our chance to experience things. Even though my life is not worthwhile there are still things I like or enjoy or appreciate and I accept that I'm giving those up.

I don't understand why I hardly ever see any post citing the fear of oblivion as the main reason why they can't CTB.

The ego's primary job is self preservation. What can be more frightening than self-obliteration?

Maybe most are too indoctrinated by religious dogma?

Is that not implied by the term survival insrinct? Because people talk about that getting in the way all the time. Even if oblivion is what they say they truly want (because there is a sort of contradiction that we often experience, fear of/aversion at not existing and the desire to no longer have to experience life).

 

[notlongnow]

You're telling me!! I'm so so ready.

Had the day from hell and literally feel like walking of a ledge. I live right next to an infamous cliff that is literally all what one would need but i can not bring myself to do it. I need/want a peaceful finish. My life has been messy enough! I owe myself that much at least.

I have no access to anything remotely dangerous that could make today the day but boy do I want it to be!! I'm angry. I'm upset. I'm a wreck there days!!

 

[bmw8]

Yes survival instinct is nearly impossible to avoid. The human mind will always find a way to stop harm

 

[GhostNote]

Definitely the biggest challenge I have ever faced.

 

[theboy]

So true

 

[Forever Sleep]

Well, I get where you're coming from and we can hope for whatever scenario we think is preferable but we still have to expect nothingness. Otherwise we are squandering our chance to experience things. Even though my life is not worthwhile there are still things I like or enjoy or appreciate and I accept that I'm giving those up.

That's interesting- I had a different take on that. I have this awful fear that even if- whatever comes next isn't a real experience- heaven/hell/purgatory- the brain will conjure it up in the moments before it dies. So- you get what you think you'll get. Bad news if (like me) you worry about the possibility of hell/purgatory. In which case- it would be ideal to convince yourself there was either nothing or heaven- if harps are your thing (really, I'm even becoming disillusioned by the idea of heaven now).

But yeah- that makes sense- to try to make the most out of human experience in case this is truly all we get.

 

[Someone123]

You're telling me!! I'm so so ready.

Had the day from hell and literally feel like walking of a ledge. I live right next to an infamous cliff that is literally all what one would need but i can not bring myself to do it. I need/want a peaceful finish. My life has been messy enough! I owe myself that much at least.

I have no access to anything remotely dangerous that could make today the day but boy do I want it to be!! I'm angry. I'm upset. I'm a wreck there days!!

I know for me I'd be over the cliff in no time, but this has been going on so long that I need pace badly.

That's interesting- I had a different take on that. I have this awful fear that even if- whatever comes next isn't a real experience- heaven/hell/purgatory- the brain will conjure it up in the moments before it dies. So- you get what you think you'll get. Bad news if (like me) you worry about the possibility of hell/purgatory. In which case- it would be ideal to convince yourself there was either nothing or heaven- if harps are your thing (really, I'm even becoming disillusioned by the idea of heaven now).

But yeah- that makes sense- to try to make the most out of human experience in case this is truly all we get.

It's an interesting perspective- some people think that what they think and do will change their afterlife experience, and some people this it just it what ist is and we'll find out what it's like when we get there, and we have no influence on what that will be- it already exists and once we leave here we go there and find out what it's like. I just don't think we'll know until it happens, no matter how sure people are that it will be one way or another.

 

[notlongnow]

I know for me I'd be over the cliff in no time, but this has been going on so long that I need pace badly.

It's an interesting perspective- some people think that what they think and do will change their afterlife experience, and some people this it just it what ist is and we'll find out what it's like when we get there, and we have no influence on what that will be- it already exists and once we leave here we go there and find out what it's like. I just don't think we'll know until it happens, no matter how sure people are that it will be one way or another.

I was there some 6 weeks ago procrastinating near the edge. Courage wasn't found! Different level when faced with the reality (imo ofcourse)

 

[Someone123]

I was there some 6 weeks ago procrastinating near the edge. Courage wasn't found! Different level when faced with the reality (imo ofcourse)

Part of it depends on your whole situation- is there a pressing reason to do it soon. Then for me pretend like you're jumping in a pool for a few seconds and get out as far as you can, and then it's a done deal. Of course I might find out I couldn't do it, but time pressure to avoid things that will be even worse can be a factor. Some people get themselves to do it, not looking down might help.

 

[notlongnow]

Part of it depends on your whole situation- is there a pressing reason to do it soon. Then for me pretend like you're jumping in a pool for a few seconds and get out as far as you can, and then it's a done deal. Of course I might find out I couldn't do it, but time pressure to avoid things that will be even worse can be a factor. Some people get themselves to do it, not looking down might help.

Ohh the reasons are there. I'm done failing my family! Its a repeat process that eats me up the more it happens. We all lose battles, ive admitted defeat. I take some comfort in that admittance

I just feel I owe them 2 things. A note of admittance and regret giving them closure, plus a possibility of saying goodbye to a viewable me. Not mangled to pieces. Hence the backtrack!

 

[LaVieEnRose]

That's interesting- I had a different take on that. I have this awful fear that even if- whatever comes next isn't a real experience- heaven/hell/purgatory- the brain will conjure it up in the moments before it dies. So- you get what you think you'll get. Bad news if (like me) you worry about the possibility of hell/purgatory. In which case- it would be ideal to convince yourself there was either nothing or heaven- if harps are your thing (really, I'm even becoming disillusioned by the idea of heaven now).

But yeah- that makes sense- to try to make the most out of human experience in case this is truly all we get.

I understand your fears and concerns. There's just nothing in the real world to suggest anything but nothingness awaits. That's not necessarily what I would like, but I know reality doesn't stop being reality just because you don't like it. The way life on this planet has always worked implies that an individual organism's existence is of little importance.